Now that I’ve left my career and cut some dead weight out of my life, I feel ready to look back and have a laugh– or just finally be able openly bitch about it. So here’s my confession: I am a dentist who really didn’t love the dentist either being a dentist. A few months ago I came across a funny post titled, “10 Reasons I Hate The Dentist.“ It appeared right when I was in the thick of my career transition. It inspired me to write this, so, RedHead Chronicles, thank you for the inspiration.
10 Reasons Your Dentist Probably Hates You Too
1. The first thing you say when you sit down in my chair is, “I hate the dentist.” Really?!? Did your parents teach you any manners? Did they ever teach you that it is impolite to tell someone you hate them the moment you greet them? What I really want to say back is, “aww, I hate you too.”
2. You come to your appointment, and it’s obvious you haven’t brushed your teeth in days. I’ve had some people with great hygiene come in and apologize because they’ve just eaten lunch and couldn’t brush. This is not what I’m talking about. I mean food and thick plaque everywhere. After 10 years of seeing blood and rotten teeth and some really nasty things, this is still the 1 thing that makes me dry heave. You know when you come to us that we have to be in your mouth. Would you clean your home before having company? Additionally, I have spent hours literally bending over backwards repairing your teeth. Could you at least pretend that you are caring for the work that I have struggled to complete for you?
3. After we have spent hours of meticulously repairing your teeth, you complain about the bill. Would you walk out of the grocery store with a bag full of groceries and expect not to pay? I’ve just helped you to continue to smile and eat comfortably, two pretty valuable things that help your quality of life.
4. I tell you that you have a cavity and you need a filling, and you wait months or even years to get the necessary work done. Eventually the tooth starts hurting. Two weeks of pain go by, and you call me on a Saturday night while I am at dinner with friends because your tooth that needed a filling a year ago and that started hurting 2 weeks ago is suddenly an emergency.
5. You come to me so I can help you, but you make it hard for me to do a good job. You wince and make faces when it’s not hurting. The idea that I’m hurting you makes me just as uncomfortable and stressed as you are. If it hurts, please tell me, and I can help you with that. But if it’s because you don’t like the whole experience, you are only causing me to work in undesirable conditions, making it harder to do my best. And when you push your tongue in the way, or you don’t open wide enough, it makes it physically impossible to get my work done. Don’t you want it to be easy for me to do the best job for you?
6. You call and say, “my tooth didn’t hurt before you worked on it.” You came to me with a cavity. I did not put it there. You did. I am simply fixing a rotten hole that was in your tooth. To do so, I must use a tiny drill to cut the rot out of your tooth. If I took a drill, cut a hole in your femur bone, and then filled it in with a foreign material, don’t you think it might be sore for a while? Same concept.
7. When we try to take an x-ray, you won’t bite down on it. We have to do this to see what is going on with your tooth. Without knowing the problem, we can’t properly treat you. I know, in some cases some people really can’t do it; but some people could and won’t just suck it up for 15 seconds. I’ve had x-rays too, and they hurt and dig into my gums, but I just do it.
8. You tell me that you bought my car for me after having a crown done. Contrary to how it seems, you actually didn’t buy me a car. You bought yourself a crown. I have spent hundreds of thousands of dollars on an education, and have spent hours making this crown fit precisely in your mouth, so maybe you helped me make a portion of a student loan payment. But you certainly didn’t buy my car.
9. You no-show an appointment or cancel last-minute. Some things are unavoidable, but when it’s because your hairdresser got a last-minute cancellation and you had to take that appointment instead, this is just rude. Not only am I unable to fill the 2 hours of my schedule that I reserved specifically for you, but someone else who wanted to get in had to wait 2 weeks for his/her appointment. And on that note, when you have the first appointment of the day, and you show up late for your appointment, I am late for every other patient the rest of the day.
10. When I tell you that you grind your teeth, you deny it, as if I am accusing you of having a horrible disease or being a baby murderer. It’s not that bad to be a tooth grinder. I’m just pointing something out and maybe offering a way to prevent more problems in the future. This observation is concluded from signs or symptoms that are based on real science, not myth.
And along those lines… bonus #11. You tell me a diagnosis I make is simply wrong without listening to me. If you know so much, why are you coming to me? You do the filling or root canal yourself. You obviously don’t need me.
Aaahhh… I feel much better now.
If this isn’t you, I am sure your dentist loves you. You are probably the bright spot of his/her day. But it makes you wonder, how do you behave when you go to the dentist? And most importantly, are you making it easy for your dentist to give you the kind of care you want and deserve?
You’re right people can be annoying to dentist. But dentist are greedy basterds that want to work out you as fast as possible not letting you close your jaw for a moment. News flash: having your mouth open for too long can give you a horrible condition called TMJ. Also, if someone complains of jaw pain after you work on them, guess what you do? You prescribed pain killers and make sure there filling was properly shaved down. Most of the time jaw pain is caused by an “over-filling” so to speak.
You are right– there are SOME dentists out there that are greedy bastards! I know some of them
However, we are not all like that. If you feel that way about your dentist, I suggest you find someone you like and trust. If you were my patient and thought that way about me, I would prefer you to find someone with whom you are happy. The dentist/patient relationship is a 2-way street. The relationship is way too important to put your health in the hands of someone you don’t trust or you think doesn’t care about you. Thanks for visiting! Great comment– I may have to address it in a future post!
heres another news flash. TMJ is not a horrible condition given to anybody by making them keep their mouth open for an extended period of time. TMJ is an acronym for tempormandibular joint. the complex of muscles, ligaments and bones on either side of your skull that allow your jaw to function (of which most people are born with). do your homework before you give another dentist a “news flash”
I’m so glad u posted that! I was going to say something along those lines.
You seem to know dentistr, but that’s not the point here. Cocky dentist like you, I just wonder if you have any decent relationship with your patients.
thanks for spelling bastards right!! and not all of them are…I’ve worked for both kinds and any profession has greedy bastards that rip people off. That’s why we have websites that use patient referrals as testimonials both good and bad!!
You don’t know what you’re talking about!
Wow. Finally someone said it. I wish I could print this up and give pts to sign before they sit in my chair and waste my time. Amen
love the comment
Thank you John for your comment. In addition, you def are taking things too harsh on dentists. I am sure there are compassionate dentists out there who actually care about giving you quality treatment.
very well said…
I have been in the admin side of dentistry since HS (17 yrs) and I agree with you. As an OM there are always circumstances to the rights or wrongs but the bottom line is its a 2-way street of respect & trust. Practice/Doctor & Patient. It is a struggle in any thing in life (doctor, dentist, hospital worker, grocery story clerk) to find a right balance where every experience is a good one… funny tho how much easier it is for patients to leave us with unpaid bills and go elsewhere but we do not have the same courtesy. Whoever said the public/patient is always right but be the same one who invented the girddle.. I guess you have to be in the “moment” to appreciate both sides of the story…
Nice…I totally agree with you!
Thank you so much for responding, lolabees. I am a hygienist and have grown up in the dental field. Suggestsmagic, all dentists are NOT what you are accusing them to be and furthermore, your information is incorrect. Yes, some fillengs need to be “shaved down” as you so eloquently put it, but all the dentists I know all ask if yoir bite feels normal before you leave. And if your dentist prescribes you pain medication just because your filling needs adjusted, then you need to find a new dentist. The better question is, are you getting those prescriptions filled?
I wish all patients were required to read this insightful blot post!!!!
Out of all the answers to the unhappy dentist I agree with your comment..he made me uncomfortable!
I find this all so amusing. So sorry U have to withstand the abuse but i completely understand it. I have had some dentists in my life who hurt me and ruined it for the rest of the dentists. It scares me to call and make an appointment. I am sooooo lucky to now have a dentist who I can relate to and I look forward to seeing. Love my hygenist. Like the staff and it is a pleasure to go there.
On a slightly different note, As an optician who can tell U we have the same issues with our patients . They all think we are out to get them. They never mind handing me a filthy pair of glasses with so much green cheese on the nose pads that without fail there is always someone in the office who asks…” did anyone bring crackers. I can’t tell U how many people want to write their own RXs and or blame the optician for all the ills of the world. When people have vision issues quite often they think it is caused by an optician who made the glasses and not the fact that they have 80 year old eyes. Don’t even get me started on what I have to touch behind the ears sometimes to adjust slipping specs! Good luck to U Dr Laura…. I understand.
I LOVE this article you wrote. It speaks my mind! Now I am thinking, should I print this out, frame it, and hang it at my clinic?
How I wish all my patients could read this.
I’m a dentist too. I am sorry to hear that you did not enjoy dentistry and decided to leave the profession. I enjoy my job but wouldnt say that I am in love with dentistry. I also can identify with some of the frustrations you have mentioned in your post.
I do feel however, that your post is verging on the unprofessional.
Is it possible that you have maybe been a touch over sensitive to some things that patients have said, done ( or not done)? I am quite certain that 99% of patients do not say/do something as a personal attack on his/her dentist.
Everyone has to take some sort of shit on a daily basis in their job, no matter what occupation they have. The way I see it, this is part of our job and its up to us to look at OURSELVES and see how we can change and influence patient’s behaviour/actions. In the event that some of the remarks /actions that you have mentioned do occur, it is up to us to be professional, mature ( and thick skinned ) enough to not take it personally and get on with our jobs. ie improving our patients’ oral and general health.
I wish you all the best with whatever future career you choose and hope that you find happiness and fulfillment.
Just remember though, nothing is perfect.
Thank you Dr. Davidson…Very well put. Sometimes impressions we have of Dentists go back to our childhood. I was not a fan of Dentists either, and ued to see a Children’s Specialist in Seattle. He is WONDERFUL and totally got me over my fear of Dentists. I am now able to come see my new Dentist without having to be given gas.
Do you have any advice on how to go about finding someone who isn’t a greedy bastard? And how to tell if the dentist that I’m using is one of those? I’m almost hesitant to ask because it would seem that some of your readers are degenerate, pseudo academians who sit poised and ready to pounce on simple misspelled words and grammatical errors. I too dislike it when I see too many errors in an article, book or newsletter, but in a comment? Lay off!!!
Yeah, it did get a bit out of hand, but I guess the masses were fired up. I struggled with approving many of the posts, but in the end felt that people wanted to be heard. You would be surprised at how many comments I didn’t approve because it started getting really uncomfortable. As far as your dentist goes, the majority that read this post didn’t comment at all, so you’re probably fine;) There are a lot of good ones out there– maybe I should write a post about that? But really, if you want to know my answer to that question, contact me on my contact page– I’d be happy to answer that for you.
Right on Doc.
I think this is sooo funny. I do have this hanging up in my office for all the wonderful patients I see everyday.
Thanks, Loren! Glad you enjoyed it!
haha everyone has TMJ (a temporomandibular joint) .. it’s actually TMD: Temporomandibular Joint Disease…
Thanks… yes, this has been a popular and very welcome point!
I’ve had 3 orthodontists see me for the condition I mentioned, TMD. There all referred to it as TMJ for simplicity. I’m sorry, that my technical error made you all so angry. Also, I want to point out people can be born with a fucked up jaw or someone can fuck it up, either a dentist, a car accident, or any injury that affect your jaw.
dysfunction (not disease)
An Orthodontist is the last person I’d see for TMD. Start throwing in brackets, wires, elastics and moving teeth around an already volatile environment and you may have a major problem. Unless you have a really jacked up mouth, your tooth position didn’t have any affect on you getting TMD.
* Temporomandibular Joint Disorder (while we’re on the subject of correcting clinical names)
TMJ is not a condition, its an anatomic part of your body. Funny how you post about diseases you know nothing about. The condition is called TMD. And no, the dentist doesn’t cause this either, its your own screwed up jaw.
Well true, I immediately wanted to comment on that loool specially after “horrible” that she put. So much hate in the world and all because of a dentist who maybe scared u as a child or a crazy parent! Trust me, they form a part of your impression as well as of course your childhood experiences that you might transfer 2 ur children. I’ve been told “I hate dentists” many, many, many times ughhh
Everyone has TMJ even dentists (its a joint that allows you to open and close) you mean to say TMD. And the TMD is from the muscle sourness that you feel afterwards… Dentists have the highest educational debt out of all professionals, which can reach up to half a million. Furthermore, I think id pay any price to keep my smile. If you want to save money just pull your teeth out and have a denture and see how that feels… When a dentists asks you to bite after he places a filling that’s to check if you have any high spots, if you tell the dentist it feels good then he cant remove anymore or if they do, they may change the way you bite.
Love it! Thanks for adding in a few wonderful points! And let’s not forget to mention (on top of the debt) the overhead and how expensive it is to run a dental practice.
Although I can understand how frustrating it would be for patients not to pay their fees, not everyone has the choice of paying “any price” for a smile. But when your tooth hurts, you have no choice but to go to the dentist and pay. Unfortunately, dentists do pay heavily for schooling; however, the failings of our education and monetary system and subsequent wealth disparity are not the fault of the patient.
Thus, it is not that people are just ‘trying to save money,’ but that they simply do not have it.
Then pay $5/mo. to show that you value the service you received. We’re not all ogres.
If you know you can’t pay, brush and floss your teeth in the first place.
Lis – regardless of cost, the bill must be paid just like for any other service. The wealth disparity, societal failings and so on you mentioned are definitely not the fault of the patient, however by the same token – people’s financial situations are not the fault of the dentist – if you need the work, you need to pay for the work – why should the dentist have to absorb the cost to provide you the service? It takes a great deal of time, staffing, and material costs to complete dental work and that is why the cost is high, that is the sad reality. No one is blaming people for being poor, it is a matter of paying for the services you receive in a timely manner even if it is expensive.
For all the patients who wish to save money, buy a toothbrush…
Great point.
@Dr. E . don’t forget floss to go with the toothbrush
I like what you just said. I think it all comes down to whether or not you’re smile is worth it to you. They charge as much as they do because not everyone can do what they do and it is a very physically taxing job. So who is really being greedy? The person that wants this specialized skill done for next to nothing after that dentist spent years sacrificing their time to study and go to school and learn how to do it or the person that spent the time to learn their trade so you can have the BENEFIT of a healthy mouth? And yes it is expensive but they’ve earned the right to charge what they do. It is a grueling educational process to become who they are. It’s hard to have sympathy for people who say it’s sooooo expensive and then buy a 2 week vacation or an iphone or ipad or over priced clothes. Who’s going to spend 7-8 years of their life basically being owned by their school and studying to come out and charge discount dental prices. They might as well just take a job as a common laborer and skip all the headache they went through if they are going to do that. It’s funny how it’s the people who haven’t made these types of sacrifices in their life who like to complain the most. Dentists make these sacrifices to have a better life for themselves and in turn you get a better life too. Maybe you’d rather have your mom tie a string to your tooth and slam the cupboard door to pull your teeth out when you get a cavity that hurts, or just simply let them rot out of your mouth on their own. Have a little respect for the service they are providing. If you want discount dental work go to Mexico……I haven’t heard of any horror dental stories coming out of there or anything.
Thanks, Geri! I like what you just said too! I totally agree… obviously
Well suggestmagic…. If you feel that your dentist is a greedy bastard, they won’t let you close, etc…then you’re seeing the wrong dentist. Why don’t you consider switching? Ask your friends and relatives about their dentist or look at the online reviews of some in your area. FYI, the average dentist keeps only between 30-35% of what they produce. Dental supplies, equiptment, staff and rent are all very pricey. Sounds like you haven’t had a good dental experience. There are great dentist out here, hopefully you find one.
Good advice!
and the 30-35% that is kept is for the half million in loans that is acquired over 8-10 years of higher level education
Thanks for the advice
, and I have switched thank god. And thanks for the interesting info about dentists income. I always thought they made much more profit.
Don’t forget malpractice insurance, school loans (if any), and all the magazines that are left in the waiting room. The ones that are left are 6 months old because people take the newer ones. Im not sure why people would just take a magazine that isn’t theirs, lol.
Suggestmatic, I’m glad that you’ve found a new dentist. I’m a dentist in TX, and I tell every patient before treatment, to let me know when they need a break. During longer procedures, I let them rest for a few minutes even if they’re saying “I’m ok.” I’ve even had a patient that needed to go outside and smoke, DURING TREATMENT! Now that was pretty annoying, but whatever will keep you happy in my dental chair is what I’ll try to do.
@lonewolf if she switched, she wouldn’t have anyone to b!tch and moan about. She probably spends most of her time complaining about the size of her thighs, juxtaposing tv shows and photographing restaurant food and then posting it on a blog because her life is so intensely amazing.
If you don’t like the dentist or what they do, then don’t go
Pretty sure even in N.Korea most glorious leader Kim Jong Il affords his loyalists that liberty. Over half of what you pay (closer to three quarters) is going to cover disposable equipment, autoclaving, equipment wear and tear, premesis costs (rental, electricity, council rates, water), insurance (so when you claim that you have a TMJ and try to take them to court, the dentist is not out of pocket for having your claim quashed, as well as property insurance), dental assistants, receptionists, storage of dental records (yes those fancy little models of your teeth need to be stored in case you get murdered and disfigured so we can identify you), cleaners, distributed losses from patients who cancel appointments etc etc.
That doesn’t go to cover reimbursement from the 4+ years we spend at dental school expected to outscore medical students on medical exams, tuition fees, and equipment expenses there so that we are in a position to operate in your mouth and not do you any damage. But hey, you know an acronym (TMJ) and aren’t afraid to use it incorrectly, so I suppose in the ample time dentists have outside when they are trying to meet their expenses, maintaining their education by attending expensive conferences, and trying to have a family, they should subscribe to your blog for a piece of enlightenment from the fountain of wisdom that you are <3
Teeth are essential for a good standard of life and your ongoing health. The latest iphone 4 or a holiday are not.
Dental insurance can make dental visits cheaper for the patient, and by REGULARLY visiting the dentist (every 6 months) the patient will actually spend less, and very seldom require services that hurt.
News flash, TMJ is the name of the joint, not a condition. Also, show us a study that proves that overfilling is the cause of most jaw pain. Foolish.
first of all TMJ is the abbreviation of temporo mandibular joint, something tha EVERYONE (except for some guy that was involved in a no helmet bike accident has!) second….greedy ??? U are the greedy trying us to work miracles and not cooperating ! we spent thousands to be able to provide you treatment and most of us are still paying the LOANS !!! so unless u are a dentist i just suggest you keep ur mouth like it sould be….SHUT !
You should shut up! This isn’t even your blog. Piss off.
@suggestsmagic “Piss off?” No… this isn’t YOUR blog, I don’t understand why you’re trying to take over all of the discussion. Dozens of people have already stated the point that has proved your foolishness, accept it and move on. You would not go to a mechanic that you don’t feel comfortable working on your car, why would you go to a dentist that makes you uncomfortable working on your teeth? Whose fault is it that you didn’t take five minutes to research reviews on local dentists…Definitely not the fault of all of the “greedy basterd [sic]” dentists you seem to loathe so much.
Why don’t you leave the diagnoses to the professionals. How on earth do you feel your speculation trumps a dentist’s four+ years of specialized knowledge in the field?
I love this article! I am a hygienist, and anyone who has to work directly in the mouth can relate to each and every one of the points this Dr. has talked about. I myself have worked with some very excellent, reputable, and caring dentists! I often heard these remarks about buying the Dr that second home, or that boat, and often wondered how some of these patients actually thought! I have had a few comments made to me about this while I was working on them, and I was quick to educate them on the overhead of running a business, the malpractice insurance, all the salaries paid with benefits to the employees because they were visiting a Dr. that cared. I also pointed out that they were probably still paying off student loans 20 years after they have been practicing, and eventually end with, “If I went to college for 8 years, I think I would deserve a few perks myself!” I have never heard a patient with an abscessed tooth come in and say I hate dentists! I am glad to see this article, if you don’t like your dentist or you think they are
“ripping” you off, then just don’t go. I am sure you will look great with no teeth driving
that sports car you bought by saving all that money the “greedy” dentists tried to steal
from you!
@twocents the answer to your question… suggestsmagic is a troll
she probably increased the views on her shitty blog 100x just by trolling on here. She gets like 2 comments on a post and then goes and flicks her bean at her popularity despite the 2 comments being from one person. But hey, she has a face for internet blogging ^.^ if I looked like a busted shoe, I’d probably blog about a tv show that was discontinued 10 years ago also 
yea…about the money part – I’m a CPA and have done taxes for dentists.
Most of them are in the 200K-400K range per year, take home income from their employment – that means after paying for their expensive equipment, taxes, staff, etc. Even the beginners in their first job out of dental school (without a residency/fellowship) start at 130+ as employees, working 3-4 days per week. Seriously, I have a client who works as an employed dentist, fresh out of D-school, 3 days per week (8-5) who makes 130K base salary + a very nice bonus plan that results in a total annual income of approx. 170K – she’s 26 and this is her first job.
I realize the debt is expensive and holding it is difficult, but no one should feel sorry for dentists as a group. Obviously Dentists do a fantastic thing that is very important; but (out of the population of my clients of dentists and primary care physicians for whom I do their tax returns) the idea that most of the dentists make more than most of the physicians while working less, with fewer years of training, in a less important (and don’t argue with my that healthy teeth are more important than general overall health – that argument can’t stand up) position is ridiculous.
Where are your clients? Beverly Hills? Your observations are just as prejudicial as the patients who say, “I just paid for your son’s college tuition.” Just because you have done taxes for a few dentists doesn’t make you an expert.
Hey JDCPA- the reason most Dentists make more than physicians is because the physicians allowed medical insurance to dictate their fees and procedures. Dentists, most of us anyway, have not allowed insurance to tell us what to do. Insurance broke the back of Medicine.
Hello JDCPA – I can tell you that what you say may be true for the one 26 year old that you did taxes for, but not for all 26 years olds. I am recently out of school as well and I do not make that amount. Especially when my school loans are sucking out thousands of dollars a month from my bank account. Perhaps that 26 year old had parents that paid for her dental school tuition, or perhaps she is practicing in a lucrative area, or perhaps she is just lucky, because I know for a fact that her salary is not the same as mine. I work 5 days a week 9-6 and make about 120,000, I did a residency in general dentistry, went to an Ivy League dental school, and this is my second job. Also, physicians may have more training after residency, but they know what they are signing up for in the long run. It’s not dentists’ fault that they decide to pick a different profession and may make more than an internist. Do you think a CEO’s work is more important than an internist’s work? Then why are CEO’s paid so much more? It is not fair to compare professions, especially when you yourself do not seem to have an medical training. And I know I do not work less than an internist, because I have friends that are internists. Also, maybe some of the dentists you are doing taxes for are specialists, who make more than general dentists which would explain the 200-400G salaries since they have had 2-6 years more training than a general dentist. And I’ll tell you one thing, dental school is no joke. Many of my friends are physicians, and honestly I find that dental school is more taxing than medical school (you can ask my best friend who is a physician and agrees with me – we went through med and dental school at the same time). Dental students have to train their hands, have to study and deal with patients one-on-one every day. Now, if you go on the specialize in, say, surgery, or really anything in the medical field, then the physician will make more than the dentist. Every day, I come home from work tired and I give my best to do my job. It does not help that many people have such a bad impression of dentists in their head that I am trying to change day by day. My mom was a dentist when I was born and my dad later became a dentist. We did not live in a posh house or have Benzes in our driveway when I was growing up. It took them a long time to start making more money (like 15-20 years). Please do not put down dentistry, as you really seem to have no idea how much dedication and hard work goes into the profession both during training and on a day to day basis. So thanks for your input, but please research a bit more widely if you’re going to make a comment like that… Also, where do work? Maybe I should move there so I can make these salaries you speak of.
JDCPA,
Your experience of dentists is very different from mine. My first job out of dental school was for $64,000 in a Federally Qualified Health Clinic. I have now been out 10 years, and have owned my own practice for 8. The most I have ever taken home is $130,000.
I am not complaining about my income – I live very comfortably. But I also know people who have far less training than I do, and live just as comfortable. For example, my house, which is roomy but by no means huge, I bought from a couple, one of whom pours asphalt, and the other is a hairdresser. Neither put in nearly the years of expensive education I have, but they were able to afford a roomy house, with a fair number of custom features, on a 3-acre lot for their family.
At my office, my car is the oldest one in the parking lot.
And as far as dentists making less than physicians – well, dentists were smart enough to say no to HMO’s, and don’t participate with as many PPO’s. We looked at the cost per procedure, and decided we couldn’t take a cut in reimbursement, and still provide the quality of care we wanted to provide. In my opinion, dental care is actually very reasonable compared to medical care. When I visit my physician, my insurance is charged $160 for a 15-minute visit, before any other services were performed. When I have a patient in for a recall exam and cleaning, with x-rays, I see them for 30 to 45 minutes, and charge $140. And I am actually using instruments and performing a procedure in addition to an exam.
Now, I am not saying physicians don’t deserve to be paid – in fact, I believe mine deserves more. But they are the ones who signed the deal with the devil to accept insurance companies telling them what to charge, and I don’t think I should cut my fees in some sort of sympathy gesture for them.
comments are made to enlighten both parties…..peace everyone!!!
I have a condition called knee. In fact, I have two.
Maybe next time educate yourself before complaining. or not. I don’t care.
I may have the same condition….is there any treatment?
hahaha…great!
Hahahah!! This is one of the funniest comments!
Lol you are actually really funny. Thanks for commenting.
I am a knight who has a condition called nu. What shall I do?
****FAVORITE COMMENT! ROFLMAO
Best comment by far, my fav!
lolzzzz…. dis is d best funniest compliment i ve heard
i ve got d same condition
TMJ….Temporomandibular Joint?…..keeping your mouth open too long gives you a Temporomandibular Joint? I was actually born with those…dont know about you. OHHHHHHH or did you mean TMJD or TMD?….haha and an appointment at the dentist is NOT going to give you TMJD…there is a lot more to it than that. You have just proved what the article was saying….ignorant people should educate themselves…and especially before they comment.
Could people stop correcting me. One little mistake, and you all jump down my throat. Wtf. Go get a life.
Actually, you should do your homework. Dental work can be a contributing factor for an acute flare up of TMD. Long procedures can exacerbate a problem.
Ibuprofin is all you need (along with a wake up call, and apparently an anatomy class) not an rx med. And just so you know… Some materials require a dry field, therefore closing your mouth would compromise your treatment. If YOU would take care of your teeth, your dentist wouldn’t need you to keep your mouth open for a long period of time or “over-fill” your teeth. They’re there to help you, stop acting like they’re all out to get you.
so true!!!
So true….. people seeking help need to stop blaming the messenger and consider the message…. btw Suggestsmagic we in the health care business (over 85% I would imagine) do not get into helping others only for the money or because we are greedy “B’S” as you so eloquently put it we actually do care about human beings and the suffering that goes along with it……. like periodontal disease……. deep carious pulpal exposure……. tooth rot……. Meth mouth……. poorly aligned dentition….. overbite…… underbite….. draining fitulous tracts….. etc etc etc…… Thanks for choosing a new less greedy “B” to do your work I feel much better you ran into one of the majority rather than the greedy minority!
I hope this little foray into the “Art and Science of Human Dentition” has been educational and beneficial to you! Wow I feel much better sharing already!
Darn it…… Misspelled “Fistulous” ……. oops
Well actually I oppose torturing patients by opening for too long. If you can’t can’t “place” an adhesive restoration in less than 10 mins and use cotton rolls and a saliva ejector in less than 10 minutes then you should apply a rubber dam and take all the time in the world. You can’t can’t get a TMJ disorder that easily by opening for too long but we should always be seeking our patient’s comfort, right?
Tarek,
Yes, we should always strive for the patient’s comfort, but not to the point of sacrificing quality of work. It wouldn’t be comfortable to have an improperly bonded composite, right? And with some procedures, like a root canal, they just can’t close for a while, period, without compromising results.
News flash TMJ is not a condition, its a part of your body. TMDD is a multifaceted problem that is not caused by your Dentist!! Dental work can aggravate an already weaken jaw joint, that you can thank a number of people for starting with your parents for handing you some crapy genetics.
suggestmagic, something you may not know about some dental materials is that they don’t work in a wet environment, until they’re completely set. This is especially true of anything adhesive, which includes tooth-colored fillings and cements used to hold crowns on teeth. Once the area is dry and isolated, if the dentist lets you close, you’ve just contaminated it again. So, if you want the job done right, you’re gonna have to stay open. Ask your dentist to use a bite block for longer procedures; you won’t have to work to keep your mouth open.
Also, prescription painkillers are unnecessary after a filling. OTC Advil or Tylenol should do the trick, and sensitivity should improve over time. An exception – if the cavity was very deep, the nerve of your tooth may have died, and you may now need a root canal.
“Most of the time jaw pain is caused by an “over-filling” – well, that explains all those TMD patients I have who have never had a filling.
I just realized how many spelling errors I had in this comment. No wonder people were calling me a moron. Oh well. *shurgs* I sincerely hope they all enjoyed insulting me, a 19 year old with TMJD.
It’s not the spelling errors. It’s your mistaken ideas as to the causes of TMD, and your lack of knowledge as to why it is necessary to keep your mouth open, even when it is uncomfortable. Often, the work reqires it. If you want your filling to fall out on the way home, feel free to keep closing and contaminating the dry field the dentist needs for the procedure to work. That’s not being a greedy bastard; it’s trying to do a good job. Some materials set up somewhat quickly once the dentist starts working – they have to work fast, and need you to cooperate. Again, not a greedy bastard; just trying to do a good job.
If you don’t like being insulted, don’t refer to an entire profession as “greedy bastards”.
Think before you open your ignorant mouth…oh wait, you might get TMJ
You say you’re insulted and that everyone is on you. News flash: you start with an insult and then make an ignorant comment. It’s not your spelling and being 19 does not excuse you. I don’t think you would take too kindly if I started with “ignorant bitch”. You should reflect on this.
It’s not your spelling errors. Insulting you? Hypocrite. You begin with a blanket insult to all dental professionals followed by an ignorant accusation. Being 19 does not excuse you. Try going around calling other people “greedy bastards”, making accusations, and let’s see how welcome you are. At 19, hopefully we can dismiss your comments as immaturity. If not, you’re in for a long and difficult life…
Unfortunately, ignorant people don’t know what they don’t know.
Well said Dr. Greedy Bastard!
Please don’t take this the wrong way…… the insults are out of line but what you have done is insult an entire segment of the population who cares and works hard to treat all manner of diseases dealing with the mouth head and neck. We don’t know how you came to have TMJD but it is a real condition with serious pain involved with it! I hope you not only found a new Dentist but have consulted a TMJD specialist because many ot these conditions are exacerbated (made worse) by having your mouth propped open too wide or too long! Please don’t feel like these well meaning individuals defense of their livelihood career and passion in any means is meant to belittle your pain or condition. I trust that someone as passionate and caring as yourself (to blog here you would have to be) can find experts who will help mollify your pain and or modify your condition. Best of luck!
Remember we zealously defend that which we love….. and we (bloggers here) love Dentistry!
Well said
I also have TMD (although in your defense, even my surgeons refer to it as TMJ) resulting in multiple surgeries and eventually bilateral joint replacements, so I can tell you first hand that your dentist didn’t cause it. Having dental work done DOES aggravate it, so you really should find a dentist who understands that you may need extra time in the chair so you can rest your jaw as you need to. I’ve had some terrible dentists but the one I see now is fabulous. She never lets me keep my mouth open for more 5-6 minutes at a time, even though it makes my appointments longer, and she’s very considerate and careful not to do anything to make me more uncomfortable. Bottom line, it’s not fair to paint the whole profession with the same brush….keep looking for a dentist who meets YOUR needs. Trust me, they’re out there and worth spending a little time to find.
BJWR Edwards, well said. I love dentistry!
Come on guys…stop bullying “suggestsmagic “
She made a little mistake…
Believe me suggestmagic you don’t know the half of it….I mean I’m reading the comments and I wonder where do some people get their information…
Like that CPA claiming that dentists make a lot of money,,,I am a dentist and I don’t make that much…
When I go home at night my whole body is aching ,my head is hurting,and i can’t see properly .
I got a disease called (X.ray) burn in my right finger as a result of prolonged exposure to X-ray because I can’t afford a professional assistant.
By the way I work and live in the Middle East.
9 hours a day, 6 days a week and my paid annual vacation is 3 weeks
And my annual income is about 30000 dollars yearly and I drive a 1997 Toyota !!!!!
My patients are sometimes violent and always rude
I don’t really care for the messed up reality of my life but trust me…dentists are frustrated and they drained all the frustration and anger on you loool.
Why in the world would you have to use your finger to take an x-ray! In America, you’d be fined a huge sum for doing that. Stop it.
I think it was the “greedy bastard” comment.
There is absolutely no literature in the JADA or in any other craniofacial journal suggesting that keeping your mouth open too long can cause tempomandibular dysfuction (TMD). News flash suggestsmajic: “TMJ” stands for tempomandiublar joint, which is NOT a condition. Educate yourself before making an opinion next time. You clearly have no idea what you’re talking about…
hahaha…a horrible condition called TMJ…your jaw joint is called the TMJ (temporomandibular joint)…do you mean TMD (temporomandibular dysfunction/disease?). I think you mean your jaw is sore…probably because you grind your teeth incessantly at night and don’t listen to your dentist when he/she tells you that you do, and need night guard to relax your muscles…see number 8 and number 10 above…you fit the mold
No problem though, I have a degree in psych, so I can understand the “root” of your complaint…(all fun and games 
Thanks for keeping it fun!
News flash: TMJ is not a condition. It’s part of your anatomy. It’s like saying your “finger” is a condition
I am not going to jump on you about your TMJ /TMJD mistake. I would just like an honest answer to this question. What type of insurance do you have, and how much dental work have you recieved?
The condition is not called TMJ… It’s TMD… TMJ stands for Temporomandibular Joint. Meaning, it’s the joint itself–a normal anatomy of your body, not a disease or condition. On the other hand, TMD stands for Temporomandibular Disorder. now, that my dear, is the condition.
Do not generalize all dentist being such. There are dentists who are passionate with what they do. Those who take time in giving you the best care they can possibly offer. Sometimes, they do things fast so that you won’t feel uncomfortable having your mouth open for a long time.
Regarding the prescription of pain killers: well, dentists prescribe their patients pain killers just to help them alleviate their pain and discomfort until the time they can visit the office again. It is true, so to speak that over-fillings can cause TMJ pains but, you have to understand that dentists make sure that their patients are comfortable before they dismiss them. They ask you several questions about how you’re feeling after the procedure before they send you home.
I’m surprised you know about tempromandibular joint pains and the like. Are you a dentist yourself or did you just read articles about it on the internet?
Newsflash: It’s called TMD you idiot. The “J” stands for joints. You already have joints. I’m just saying, if you’re gonna be all miss smarty pants, try to be smart
Wow…Please don’t comment on things you have no experience in. It only makes you look like a royal idiot. 1st off when considering the what the dentist charges you have to take into consideration the costs for his materials (composite i.e white filling, amalgam i.e silver filling, instruments, over head such as assistants, rent for the office, office supplies and so on…oh and not to mention his/her extensive education!) 2nd the reason behind keeping your jaw open for so long is because a lot of these procedures need good isolation! Meaning he/she needs to work without a break so that there is no contamination of the work area. If that prepped tooth gets wet (by your saliva) the doctor and assistant have to start all over again. The materials will not work if there is not proper isolation. If you want your tooth fixed that’s the price you have to pay. So shut up and open your mouth! 3rd…I’ve never heard of pain from an over filling. Dentists always go in with blue/red paper (articulating paper) to see where they need to adjust the filling. Lastly TMJ is not caused by keeping your mouth open for an extended amount of time. temporomandibular joint is part of the jaw…it’s a network of muscles, ligaments and bones that allow your jaw to function. So in a nutshell if you don’t like having work done on your teeth then you need to brush and FLOSS every day. Simple as that.
Actually, you can have pain from a high filling. It is very common. Even with the articulating paper that is used for adjusting a filling, because the patient is numb, they can have a hard time feeling the high spot until the anesthesia has worn off. Also, if you assume it is just sore from the drilling and continue to bite down on it you can cause such severe trauma to the nerve that the tooth could die and end up needing a root canal .
Woa! Lighten up fellas…the original article was I’m sure a tongue in cheek(yes, that’s annoying too) dig at some of our less helpful clients. I’m not sure I’m a great patient myself! I think we all know that most awkward behaviour is caused by our patients anxiety or lack of understanding, so I always explain what I’m doing as I go along..that goes for bills too…If it’s a big one I usual pop in a comment like,’how else will I pay for my foreign holiday?’ before the patient has time to think of it themselves! It gets a laugh and lightens the mood.
I do wonder though, how many ladies would insist on crossing their legs during a cervical smear test or would put their foot in a dish of saliva, followed by a nice roast dinner after having a toe nail removed, and expect it to heal overnight with no pain!
Yes, I still love the profession and my patients…well most of them.
To suggestsmagic:
First and foremost, if you don’t have a doctorate diploma or even a college degree, your opinions don’t count. If you are talking about greed when someone is trying to help your teeth from rotting, you should try living your life without teeth. It sucks. And besides, we need you out and about of the chair so that the next patient that is hurting can be seen. You’re not the only one that’s hurting or needs “special” attention. Anyways, there will be a day when at least one of your tooth is hurting. You will be doing every dentist in America a favor by going to Mexico for treatment. And besides I heard they charge really cheap. Here’s a tip that applies to a lot of dentists out here in the states: the moment I feel that the patient shows a hint of lack of appreciation, we refer patients out. Me and my staff don’t deserve a stressful day because of patients like you. We have too many patients that are very appreciative of our work. I would rather focus on them 100% than idiots
And please do some in-depth research about “TMJ”. If you went to doctorate school, you would know.
- The worst kinds of people are the ignorant and dumb people.
- To everyone else, sorry about my rant
Wow some of the most dumbest people I know have. Degrees just because your some big shot doctor who probably mooched off his parents for eternity doesn’t necessarily mean you are better or more bigger of a person. Einstein wasn’t smart because some book told him what to think because his own brain could think outside the box. Get off your high horse many of your great customers don’t have degrees but there voices and opinions do matter.
…”…most dumbest…”…??? I think it’s so weird to tell people off for being dumb while proving you’re ignorant yourself…you need to go back to school and learn your grammar…I think you simply meant “…dumbest…”.
…”…more bigger..”…maybe you just meant “..bigger…”, correct? It scares me how uneducated a large section of society is today…we need to go back to the basics in our schools and concentrate on old fashioned reading, writing, and arithmetic! Don’t you embarass yourself when you make comments, but can’t even communicate them in plain english?
xyline is as stupid as suggestsmagic.
“The Dentist” I agree with everything you said and I appreciate my dentist and orthodontist very much. However, I very heavily disagree with the fact that your opinion doesn’t count due to a lack of “paper” and a huge debt to repay. I run a very successful business and I don’t have a college degree. In fact I’m one class shy of my degree and it’s been that way for nearly 9 years. Why don’t I have it? Because it wasn’t going to do anything for me. There are MANY ultra successful business people who lack a college education. Thank you for solidifying my thougths about over-educated people thinking that they are holier than thou because they spent years in study and accrued hundreds of thousands in debt whom of which most end up having a very average paying career. However, with that said if you are going to specialize in a field… such as dentistry, law, medicine etc. I hope you are the best of the best and the smartest of the smartest. So if you’re comment that “your opinion doesn’t count” is related to this topic alone than disregard my comments. But you may want to consider the fact that you sound a bit high and mighty. I probably wouldn’t use you as a dentist due to that one comment alone.
xylina:
– We became doctors because of hard work and dedication. Hard lesson: students don’t get accepted to med or dent school because they “mooched off” of their parents. We got to where we are because we made the right choices, with a help of little bit of luck. There were many hours invested into studying. 3-6 hours of studying EVERYDAY.
– And are you stupid or just really stupid? Einstein read hundreds of books through HARDWORK and DEDICATION.
– Actually, people that come into the office are treated more like patients than customers. If they want to get treated like a customer, go to Walmart or Target because your opinion matters to them. But as a patient, it’s best to do what’s recommended by your professional. Your can say your opinion, but it goes from one ear to the next. Once your in the office, the only opinion that matters is the doctors. That’s what you came in for, to hear my professional opinion.
– So again, don’t put yourself in a situation where you look like an ignorant citizen of the country. You make yourself look dumb.
– And besides 3000+ patients coming in and out of my office can’t be wrong. I have successfully weeded out dimwits like you who try to diagnosis their own problems. ******That should be number 11 on the list. PLEASE DON’T COME IN THE OFFICE AND DIAGNOSIS YOUR OWN PROBLEM.
BY THE WAY, TOP 10 LIST. YOU HIT THE SPOT ON ALL 10
Very well said..
Xylina, really? Most dumbest? More bigger? Come on you have got to know that doesn’t make you look very smart. And Einstein’s brain could think outside the box? Einstein wasn’t smart because some book told him how to think? What are your qualifications to be able to say these things? Have you studied Einstein? And how do you know Einstein even thought outside the box? Do you have your degree in mathematics? Here’s something to think about, what if not all doctors are big shot mooches? What if Einstein still thought inside the box but his box was just bigger than yours? What’s the difference between your and you’re and there and their? Just a thought, maybe you could read your comment before you actually post it. Preferably out loud.
I agree the worst kind of people are ignorant and dumb people. However, I would never say if you do not have a doctorate or college degree your opinions don’t count! Are you kidding me?! Do you even realize how privileged you were to go to school, never mind for 8 years? I know everyone should be educated, but this is not a world of equal opportunity!
No matter how uninformed the original comment – saying that anyone without a doctorate or college degree does not have an opinion that counts is just as ignorant and rude. Particularly ironic is that your own post has errors (see: “there will be a day when at least one of your tooth is hurting” – teeth?). Theoretically, if you went to grade school, you would know. So much for those theories on education being the only qualifier….
Wow “the dentist” – your second post is even worse than your first. The best dentists discuss with their patients, they don’t just shove information down their throats. “If they want to get treated like a customer, go to Walmart or Target because your opinion matters to them”, “Your can say your opinion, but it goes from one ear to the next.”, “Once your in the office, the only opinion that matters is the doctors” (note another spelling error starting off this sentence, almighty doctor – I believe you mean “you’re”)… What was that again about people making themselves look dumb and ignorant? Your (note the correct form of the word) comments are so rude and disrespectful, I can only assume that the reason you have 3000+ patients would be because you live in a small town with no other practicing dentists for miles around. Get over yourself, you were probably bottom of YOUR class.
I have to disagree with the Dentist. You DO NOT have to have a gedree to be an intelligent and informed individual. My father is ver knowledgeable about different aspects of dentistry and he has had no college education. I can have a conversation with him about things I have done in dentistry and he can keep up with me most of the time. So, you are very ignorant to think you must have a college education to be knowledgeable about something even as complicated as dentistry.
@xylina – my wife received her doctorate 9 years ago. She by far did not “mooch” off her parents. Her father had no involvement in her life and her mom was physically disabled bringing in around $600.00 per month in disability. My wife made it through her education on hard work and student loans. She makes a very nice salary now, but she earned it the old fashion way – through hard work on her own part!!! If you actually knew physicians and dentists and other doctorate level health professionals, you would know that most DO NOT come from wealthy families where they can “mooch” off their parents.
Oops … I can’t type. I meant degree, not gedree
Is English your second language? You disgrace our profession.
Well said. I don’t tolerate people who belittle me or my staff. I say straight up “it seems you’re not happy here. Perhaps you would be more comfortable seeing another Dentist. Let me refer you to the Dental society for some names…I no longer tolerate miserable people.
Another know-it-all hipster… Go ride your fixy somewhere else.
Newsflash!!!! TMJ is not a condition. It stands for temporomandibular joint. we all have one.
or two
smartass, true
)))
“News Flash”: Maybe you should sit in on a dental education class or two before you start telling everyone how much you know about dentistry…otherwise you just sound foolish. Amazing how everyone thinks they are an expert…I’m not a surgeon and I would never try to tell someone how to do any type of surgery. Why is everyone suddenly an expert on everything else EXCEPT what they are responsible for?
I agree!
i don’t think a lot of people appreciate the dental education, and what exactly a dentist has to go through and learn/know to become a dentist. case in point, my brother once asked my husband why he had to go to 4 years of school just to learn how to drill on teeth. or even my brother-in-law (a little more benign), commenting on my husbands jack-o-lantern this year, said, “You could just as easily be a surgeon judging from the precision with which that pumpkin was cut.” i’ll admit that i didn’t even appreciate the extensiveness of a dental education until going through it (vicariously) alongside my husband. dentistry involves so much more than just teeth. the suffixes dmd (DOCTOR of dental MEDICINE–or some latin equivalent) or dds (DOCTOR of dental SURGERY) signify that. there should be an education class on dental education.
something to chew on: even when your neighborhood barber was also your dentist, they charged so much more for dental work than grooming–15 cents for a hair cut 50 cents to pull a tooth. now a days, i don’t know too many people complaining about paying $75-100+ for hair care every 1 1/2 to 2 months. school debt, business overhead, etc aside, shouldn’t that equate then that you should be willing to spend at least 2-3 times that much for dental care? and if you take care of your teeth, and get the suggested cleanings/check-ups twice a year, chances are that you’ll easily spend much, much less for dental work than you do on your hair.
Dont be too rude with dentist,TMJ mean temperomandibular joint it is not a disease, TMD-temperomandibular disease will not be caused by opening too long in a single appointment, more than i think no dentist will make the patient to open wide for long period unless and until it is mandatory and not more than 20 min at a stretch,and pain killer is not mandatory after fillings, make sure about your basic knowledge,Over filling do occur, not in all cases, and most of the time dentist will book the patient for check up and polishing after the filling, if you fail to adher the appointment , it is not the dentist to be blamed, i accept there are some who works unethically but calling dentist as greedy basterds is too strong word
Suggestsmagic, your TMJ comment is correct in some ways and for a 19 year old fairly insightful. Up until ten years or so ago, everyone called the dysfunction of the the jaw joint TMJ. TMD or TMJD are the correct acronyms used today. Hopefully, if you really do have TMD, you know this is a treatable condition. I suggest you find a dentist ‘you’ trust and have the condition properly diagnosed and treatment planned. No one should treat the condition without a minimum of the following: a complete history of the condition including any traumatic incidences; impressions of the teeth along with a bite impression mounted on a fully articulated articulator; a two-position bilateral transcranial radiograpgh with your teeth biting together and slightly apart; and a detailed range of motion examination. Simply wearing a nightguard is usually NOT the answer. Not treating this condition early will result in a lifetime of unnecessary pain. Good luck.
Thank you for a civilized reply, although her accusation of Dentists being “greedy bastards” and her misinformation, she is probably just a frustrated patient and is venting. All of this meaness and hatefulness is not solving any patient/dentist relations. Thank you for showing kindness and civility in a society that at times is losing those graces.
great comment! from one dentist to another, you sound like a dentist I would want to go to.
Thank you, Dr Bueno! Great advice! Elisa Sin and Kristine– agreed.
Well said. While reading ignorant comments filled with generalized accusations doesn’t exactly settle well with me, I believe she deserved a thoughtful, PROFESSIONAL response to set her straight. Dr. Bueno estaba realmente BUENO. I’m proud to know I have colleagues like you out there. @suggestsmagic: I am happy to hear that you’ve found a dentist you like and trust. Ultimately, this is the most important factor when choosing any professional or specialist, whether it be a doctor/dentist, lawyer, accountant or even dry cleaner!
I couldn’t have said it better! Thanks you so much, Natasha!
Treatment is successful in 30 to 50% of all cases, depending on the study and if you mean that she can be pain free.
Wow you can tell you have never worked in a dental office! Or gone to medical school, they don’t do what they do to be “basterds” they do they best job they can as fast as they can for you (personally I would rather then stay in there a little longer just to make sure they do their best), and pay their own bills like student loan (over $200,000.00 on school alone) to be able to provide that service for you, have you seen how much it cost to run a business? Do you think you can afford a $2000 electric bill each month? Consided that as one of the MANY expenses they have to pay before you can even walk in. And just having your mouth open does not cause TMJ look it up. Overfilling… really you must have been so eager to get out of there you probly did not take the time to show how you bite fits together. So I suggest re-evaulationg. If not let your teeth root out and get dentures oh wait you still would have to go see your dentist…. I hope your dentist never see you comment, for you sake.
Ummm….Everyone has 2 TMJ’s (temporalmandibular JOINTS). Do some research before you make such ignorant comments. The condition is called TMD (temporalmandibular DISEASE) and is not caused by your mouth being open too long. Next time you give someone a BJ, ask yourself “is my jaw sore?” The answer will probably be no. Stop being a dumbass.
Your an idiot, she obviously is’nt familiar with the whole language, and it does’nt matter even a bit, fucktard.
Not nice.
Lolabees, Would you allow me to link to your blog? I would like use it as the basis of my next blog – ?
Absolutely! Thanks for all of your helpful comments.
peace to you
TMJ is the joint, not a condition, dental whiz. TMD is a condition caused by your crappy genetics or personal joint make-up, not the dentist. I’m married to a dentist, and he is far from a greedy bastard. I’m also a dental hygienist, and it’s people like you who think they know about dentistry and the mouth who need to be booted out the door. Go to dental school and see if you have the same opinion.
FYI: Everyone has TMJ (temporomandibular joint). It is a joint much like a knee. After a run, do you tell people you have “knee.” If you are going to diagnose yourself please use the proper terminology. Temporomandibular joint dysfunction (TMD) encompasses a variety of problems that can affect the joint. Some are of muscular origin, some from anatomical problems with bone of the joint, some from disc inflammation/damage, etc… Be cautious about over simplifying a subject you are not an expert in. If your mouth fatigues during treatment, then inform your doctor so they can take steps to alleviate the problem. The best thing to do is inform your dentist before they start working that your jaw tires during treatment and you would like to take periodic breaks to rest. They will accomodate your request & they can recommend other therapies to do at home and before treatment to make the experience more comfortable. If you are having difficulty communicating with your dentist, you may need to look for someone who can better understand your needs. Best of luck.
Wow! You know soooo much about dentistry why don’t you fill your teeth yourself?!! That way you don’t have to go see a “basterd” dentist that gives you “TMJ”! By the way, TMJ stands for “Temporo Mandibular Joint”. Everybody has TMJ! It’s the name of your Jaw joint! Such a shame that some people with mentalities like you even exist!
And, I LOVED the article! IT’S SOOOO TRUE! Thank you!
Having your mouth open for too long is not the only thing that causes TMJ, plus you have to have your mouth open for a long period of time, a lot of the time. And if your in the dental chair THAT often with your mouth open THAT long, then you have clearly neglected yourself. And you do not prescribe painkillers for jaw pain, that doesnt fix the problem, it masks it
haha you know nothing about dentistry or tempromandibular joint dissorders! if you did you would delete your post! oh and TMJ is not a condition, its a joint!!!!!!
Umm..”Your wrong”, you should maybe check your spelling and grammar before you criticize someone else. First of all, your handle should be “You’re wrong” not your. It appears that you have some serious issues with apostrophes. “Is’nt ” is actually “Isn’t”; “does’nt” is actually “doesn’t”.
News flash, TMJ isn’t a condition…it’s a joint…everyone has one
TMJ is an abbreviation of TemproMandibular Joint, it is not a condition it is simply a joint name!
)
News flash: brush your teeth and follow your Dentists instructions and you won’t have to open your jaw for too long!
Everyone, I don’t think we need to be nasty to correct someone’s ignorance. Just correct it without hurling abuse. Just as in any profession, there are those that are excellent in their trade and those that are just in it for the money. Personally, I can think of other ways to make a dollar than having to put my face that close to someones mouth. I know someone that I can barely have a face to face conversation let alone, correct the issues that may be causing that breath. I take my hat off to you dentists that decided to go in that direction. I just had to change dentists that recently did a filling on me. I had to go back, not kidding, FIVE times to correct a filling. I couldn’t sneeze, bite down, or drink without pain. He also bathed in cologne and made it really hard to breath while in his chair. So, what did I do? Found another dentist… And I have to admit, I have said I hate going to the dentist while in the chair. Never even gave it a second thought. I will not say that anymore. Thanks for giving me that slap on the head.. I should have known better. : ) Good luck to you!
Thank you, Honey! I’m sorry you had a bad experience, but glad you were able to find someone to help you. The truth is, if you are a lovely person, you can say “I hate going to the dentist,” and your dentist will probably laugh at you and hug you when you leave. It’s obvious that you are in that category!
I have to disagree with u! Your jaw hurts from 1 or 2 things or both…The shot if a lower injection or the muscles that you use everyday to chew and talk and smile with.I f smile alot or laugh after awhile everyone says “my jaw hurts from laughing too much!” so when you hold your mouth open for a period of time it uses the muscles of your jaw to bcome sore! Learn about the anatomy of the mouth before you think you can comment. And for the “greedy bastards” yes there are some that want JUST your money but not all!
FYI there is no condition called TMJ…TMJ is temporomandibular joint …basically your jaw joint . The condition is TMD temporomandibular dysfunction.
The reason I am a greedy bastard dentist is because of moronic, non-appreciative, ignorant people like you. Time to raise my fees.
hilarious!
ha a condition called TMJ – that made me laugh
)
When a patients jaw is numb they tend to bite down differently then when they are not. We use articulating paper that marks where you are hitting wrong. But when you are numb you don’t always bite correctly. Then when you get home and the anesthetic wears off, you begin biting normally, and you hit in the spots that we couldn’t see when you were numb. We mark your tooth as well as possible but we can’t always get it perfect the first time. So all you have to do is go back in and have it “shaved” down a little bit more. It is not the dentists fault. And yes it is common. Also why we tell patients that if they have “pain” to call and come back in. But its idiotic patients like you that think anything wrong is our fault, also that you see to know more despite our years of studying that make our jobs miserable. While I agree some dentists are greedy, most are just trying to do what is best for you. I have seen enough patients to know that some are just miserable and whiny no matter what you do. Like you. Like others have said. Maybe read up on some basic dental terms before you give us a news flash. By the way. You are paying your greedy bastard of dentist. So if you aren’t happy….find a new one!
Actually my mom had a crown done, but it just would not fit in there right and because she couldn’t eat anything solid (because as a consequence the other side of her mouth got extremely sore too) she lost a significant amount of weight. It took a year of trying to make it right and finally my mom gave up and she says it’s better now as long as she doesn’t chew on that one side.
It’s called TMD
we all have a TMJ hahahha
Condition is not called TMJ, it is called TMD. TMJ stands for temporomandibular joint, everybody has TMJs. TMD stands for temporomandibular disorder. And yes, all ten reasons are correct, and I could add a few more to the list
Correction- TMJ stands for temporomamdibular joint- everyone has one… TMD or temporomamdibular disorder is the problem with the joint. If you are going to bash those of us with 10 years plus of education, please get your terminology correct at least.
I AM a dentist and believe me we are NOT greedy bastards! We are physicians who have the ability to KILL you when you sit down in our chair!! Therefore you are paying us for going to school all these years to do a job that YOU CAN’T DO YOURSELF and putting up with your complaining and rudeness!!!! Clearly we have your mouth open for a REASON!! It’s because if your nasty, slimy spit touches what we’ve already done…guess what?? WE HAVE TO START ALLLL OVER!!! And guess what else…..Stop acting like you know what we know!!! EVERYONE has a TMJ!!! You have NO IDEA what that is obviously!!! Google it so that you don’t sound so ignorant in the midst of your future rants!!
Remember, though that at the end of the day you’re a denist, not a real doctor.
Your mom calls me doctor
LOL! I hear that all the time! Bring it on, baby!
Remind me again, what does the first “D” in “DDS” stand for?
@Cardiology MD – I am thoroughly intrigued by your comment. I have to know all those medications with which you are keeping our mutual patient alive. Do you “real doctor” consult with your patients as to their dental health? People with gum disease are almost twice as likely to suffer from coronary artery disease. I frequently ask my patients with cardiovascular issues if their cardiologist ever inquired about routine dental checkups. The answer is most often a resounding, “NO!” I am also still amazed at the number of new patients walking into my office with a recent joint replacement having never been told (or better yet given a prescription) to take an antibiotic one hour prior to dental visits that could result in any amount of bleeding. I don’t know how thorough a cardiologist you are, but by my observations, we are treating people. We are not treating just hearts or teeth or knees. Let’s work together to help our patients.
Geez! He was kidding!
Oh Cardiology MD, so cute when you guys think you are better (even if you cannot spell). In any case, I will keep my eyes open in case I should meet a “denist” one day so I can tell them they aren’t a ‘real doctor’.
Oh before I go, not to burst your bubble, but assuming your name is correct, get off your high horse, everyone knows cardiology isnt brain surgery
@CardiologyMD: Dentist = doctor just as much as physician = doctor. Please keep in mind, a dentist knows WAY more about your field of expertise than you know about dentistry. I think my medical school roommate while I was in dental school told me that they received a 3 hour lecture on dentistry, to include cariology, anatomy of the oral-maxillofacial region, and demonstrations of quick “fixes” for patients who present with dental pain. A 3 hour lecture, to cover tiny bits and pieces of what I learned in 4 years of dental school plus 3 years of an OMFP residency… really? Did you know that when the first dental school was proposed (U of MD at Baltimore), several self-taught dentists went to the U of MD Med School to ask if dentistry could be made a specialty of medicine? They were told no, there isn’t enough knowledge to be had, or skills to acquire, in the field of dentistry to justify making it a separate specialty. Apparently nothing has changed on the medical side since the mid-1800′s… you are still led to believe that the whole scope of dentistry can be compressed into a 3 hour lecture! Too funny. But again, I know much more about medicine than you know about dentistry. You have revealed that you know as little about dentistry as suggestsmagic… however she is a 19 year old patient and I can tolerate her ignorance on the subject. Ignorance from a fellow health professional is another matter, and imo is inexcusable.
You’re a freaking moron. TMJ is the Temporomandibular Joint. TMD is Temporomandibular Disorder and is what you can get if somebody stretches your joint ligaments but is not usually caused by keeping your mouth open to do a filling. Most dentists aren’t greedy bastards like most priests aren’t pederasts. Oh yeah, and for you nimrods that think you inherited “soft teeth,” here’s a brush and floss–use it.
To the Oral Health Professionals:
Please read the previous responses before posting, I’ve read a million or so responses by dentists and what I assume to be educated people correcting a 19 year old layperson because she doesn’t know the difference between TMJ and TMD/TMJD. I think we got the idea after the first 10 posts. It doesn’t need to be repeated ad nauseam.
Also TMD is commonly referred to as TMJ, if you type in TMJ in Google guess what comes up? In fact all the links are associated with TMJ pain or disorders, not one link on the TMJ itself. Here’s a word for you guys: interchangeability. Kinda like how automobile=car, pop=soda, Ash Forceps= bird beaks, 23= cowhorns, radiograph=x-ray, sutures= stitches, etc…. My personal favorite however is how East West is used interchangeably with Cryer even though technically its not. (You may not do it but I’ve seen it done repeatedly)
Finally you all seem like educated people so why do most of you ridicule her for her ignorance? Do you treat your patients the same way? She’s 19, probably barely a college sophmore; most dentists are at the very youngest 26/27 when they graduate. You have easily 7-8 years worth of education more than her and she’s a moron because she didn’t know the difference between TMJ and TMD? You might as well call your children idiots for not knowing how to find the Lagrange multiplier equations for the point of the surface x4 + y4 + z4 + xy + yz + zx =6 at which x is largest. In fact most of you probably don’t know how to do that, dumbasses.
To suggestsmagic:
I’m sorry they harped on you but you did call the entire profession a bunch of greedy bastards. Believe it or not dentists are part of the 99%,albeit the upper 99%, but 99% nonetheless. And not all dentists make money, they teach you the procedures and theories in school but there is no class titled “Sustainable Business Practices for the General Dentist” or “How to NOT Run Your Practice Into the Ground”. Oh and if you brushed twice daily for 2 minutes each time and flossed correctly, twice daily as well, we wouldn’t have to force your mouth open for extended periods while we drill and fill now would we?
Thank you for this perspective. And I have no idea what the Lagrange multiplier equations are, so it sounds good to me
Great post! Yes, the horse has been beaten to death people, let it go and move on. It was a post by a 19 year old girl, she has gotten the point, she SAID she got the point. Enough already! Makes us all look like jackasses IMO.
Im a assistant and have been for 17 yrs, we give our patients breaks throught the procedure, however when we are working we are using materials that cant get wet, so we can always give someone a break. Yes having your mouth open for a long time causes muscle fatique/pain..the jaw joint is the “TempralMandibularJoint” not the name of the pain. Pain killers dont help tmj pain they on mask the pain, antiinflammatories like Advil and Aleve help with discomfort. Yes a high filling can cause pain in the teeth or if not adjusted can cause pain in the joint, however we try our best to adjust the bite right the first time, but when patients are numb the sensation isnt the same when you bite together, so sometimes this happpens. Im sorry you had a bad experience, but i promise its not done to rush through patients at least not in our office.
Thank you for a very helpful explanation of what we do.
I have a question for you not related to the whole TMJ thing though. You mentioned there are materials you use that can not get wet otherwise they are not effective. I was wondering if you could list a couple of these materials because i am a college student and im writing a paper about dentistry and i think its rather ironic that dentist work in a wet environment but the materials they use cant get wet.
It’s the standard of care to use a rubber dam. Only true professionals use it.
@college kid:
eg composite resin, amalgam, glass ionomers. The materials do not set instantly, and moisture can contaminate the bonding of the material. Additionally if some materials get too dry they can also have problems. Moisture contamination can cause problems not just with the strength of the restoration but also its retention and aesthetics.
College Kid, the most common materials we use that require a dry environment are composite (tooth-colored filling materials) and cements for crowns, veneers, etc. But most material we use really work best in a dry field, even if we can obtain acceptable results in the presence of some moisture.
The irony is not lost on us, belive me, but it’s what chemistry has to offer at this time. The reason these materials require a dry field is because they are hydrophobic, meaning they don’t mix well with water. If they contact a wet tooth surface, they sort of “float” on the surface of the water or saliva, much as oil floats on water, and don’t adhere to the tooth structure as we need them to do. If we used hydrophilic materials which would adhere to a wet surface, it seems that this problem would be solved, but such material tend to be water-soluble over time and would therefore actually dissolve. There actually were filling materials in the past that did this – they were great for a while, but then literally dissolved away in the saliva. So we choose the material that needs a dry field until it cures, since we can generally maintain that field for the time needed. We can’t stop a patient’s salivation forever.
I’m assuming you are not a science major, and therefore tried to use layman’s terms. If you are indeed a science major and this explanation comes across as a bit simplistic, I apologize.
I am laughing right now! Once again someone making their own diagnosis. The condition isn’t TMJ. That simply stands for temporalmandibular Joint. If you have trouble opening your mouth it is called Temporalmandibular Disorder commonly abbreviated to TMD.
Everyone has TMJ.
I agree that some dentists are greedy, but so are some accountants, some optometrists, some engineers, some governmental leaders, even some librarians. It seems that you have had some misguided expectations of your dentist. I have been to one dentist before who told me I had 15 cavities and gone for a second opinion to find that I only had one or two. We are our own advocates no matter what advice we choose to accept. We are responsible for our own selves. For a dentist to ask that we act properly while they try to take care of our mouth is not unreasonable.
Tylenol works wonders as a pin killer by the way.
I personally think people should take Miss. Manner’s classes. If you had them you wouldn’t use the foul language that you are so fluent in.
Carmen, thank you so much for your constructive comment… and for not name calling
lol! A little knowledge is a dangerous thing!
After 11 years of school, my daughter came out of school $400,000 in debt and then spend another half million dollars to open a small office. Do you think there’s any hope of her buying her own home any time soon? It’s people like you that just wreck the world for everyone!
The name calling is really making me sick. I have already blocked hundreds of comments blasting suggestsmagic. This post is fun for so many of us and the nastiness has to stop! If you feel the need to call someone an idiot, a**hole, f’ing whatever, take your comments somewhere else. Sorry. I wanted to give everyone the chance to participate in the discussion, but none of us need to be flooded with such negativity in our lives. Constructive comments still welcome.
Not all dentists are bastards! I work for one of the few who are not.. yes he has his bad days but he is laid back, conservative and can give some awesome dental care! And news flash that is why they have mouth props to help relax ur jaw muscles maybe ask for one next time! But I agree there are real shady dentists out there and thats why you should go to Academy of General Dentist website and find one that way.. just a suggestion
Actually, I’d say you work for one of the majority who aren’t bastards. In my experience, only a few ARE. Just like any other group of people, you’re gonna find a mix of good and bad – mostly good, a few bad. I’ve heard dentists argue for hours over what is the most appropriate treatment plan for a patient – they’re so passionate because they’re so concerned abouthte patient’s best interests. They all agree they want the best for the patient, even if they disagree regarding how to achieve that goal.
The truth is. Having your mouth open for a length of time at a dental appt and coming away with TMD means your jaw was already stuffed up before that to a certain extent and the appt just exacerbated the condition. The only way the dentist is at fault is if he or she didn’t advise you of your poor joint health in the past. If a dentist recommends splints to you and you decline that and later end up with TMD from a dental appt that can involve 5, 10 or 30 mins of actual opening time then the dentist cannot be blamed for this.
Also..not all dentists work fast because they are greedy. Some work fast so that the patient doesn’t need to have their mouth open too long thereby getting TMD symptoms and because the dentist may not want the next patient to have to wait too long because he or she is running late because it only takes one late show to screw the day up.
I am a dentist and I typically don’t “work out” anyone, at any speed. I think that it would be a good idea for you to do just a little bit of research, before you make this type of allegation. I’m sorry that you have had bad experiences with your dentist, but try to avoid blanket statements like this, it is just silly. There are greedy people in all walks of life. There are greedy preachers, nuns, teachers, stock brokers, etc. But there just as many that are not greedy. News Flash: the only way to a dentist to work on a patients teeth is for him to have his mouth open. To do dentistry with your mouth closed is much more painful than jaw soreness, I assure you. Hang in there suggestsmagic, hope you can find a dentist that treats you with kindness. And try out spell check, it works great!
there is no such thing called good dentist or bad dentist ,
hey girl… dont talk of things u dont know alright… i am not a dentist, i am a medical doctor… TMJ is not a disease.. it is the joint of ur jaw.. called tempero mandibular joint… u can always tell your dentist that u want to close ur mouth for a while when he’s doing the procedure..u dont say it and u blame ur dentist… it’s best that u manage ur dental problems all on ur own.. respect him …
Only a dentist (in private practice) as an owner of the practice, understands and feels the pain of our everyday professional life. Talk to your dentist before making negative comments. Very few make it to be a dentist and even fewer can handle the stress of running a practice. Next time THANK your DENTIST.
hi…if by time you feel uncomfortable, sitting/lying in the dental chair, then you can tell or inform your dentist in a a NICE way by raising your hand…letting us know how you feel is important to us…its like a give and take relationship…
You need to find a better dentist. If your dentist makes you feel that way, you are probably correct……so why go back to him/her. High spots happen, but it’s the dentist’s job to get you comfortable and back to normal as quickly as possible. I tell patients that I don’t charge extra for doing it right (the first time). Also, that if they think that they have a high spot, they probably do….it will get better as soon as it gets adjusted, and the bite is back to normal. That said, it’s much easier to check the bite when a patient is not numb.
..”having your mouth open for too long can give you a horrible condition called TMJ”…
I presume you are a female, so I have a question for you: When you go to your Gynecologist for your regular check-ups, do put your legs crossed…or do you actually open them and let the Dr. do his/her job? ……that’s would be as difficult as a dentist trying to work with a patient that opens their mouth about 5mm……
Just saying……
dhuuuuu! You soffer from TMJ? Good for you! I have two… thamks God each side of my skull! Two Temporo Mandibular Joints. If you are not happy with your dentist, find a new one but be sure that him too can have conditions to love you back. Be nice young lady. I am sure that you will find sonner or latter a nice dentist too
TMJ is a joint. Temporomandibular joint. If you knee hurts you don’t say you have a horrible condition called knee. When you want to hate on a dentist, at least know what you’re talking about. It’s called TMD, hun.
Technically, everyone has TMJ. Two, in fact.
Everyone has a TMJ, TMD is caused by your teeth not matching the closing path of your TMJ, you may be sore after an appointment but every extra centimeter you open helps dentists achieve the micron margins that restorations require. And most jaw pain is caused by infections, not overfilled fillings, although they can be painful also.
You really need to go and see another dentist, if this is your thoughts and feelings of dentists, you have been greatly mistreated. I believe Lolabees is actually commenting on patients with ignorant attitudes much like yours. If you actually knew how much it costs to look after a patient correctly, and in fact how little the dentist gets of the fee, you might retract “greedy bastards”. You have painted the entire profession with one big inaccurate brush. There is a great saying, trying walking in someone else’s shoes a day before you judge. I am sorry that your dental experiences have have left you so angry and misinformed. DMD
May I ask you which dental school you graduated from? Because there are many techincal things wrong with what you have said. Have a lovely day. Just FYI, TMJ is not a condition it is an anatomical system called temporomandibular joint. TMD is a condition that is a disorder of TMJ. But interesting comeback though. Makes us all feel a lot better.:)
News FLASH…..all you really have to do to prevent the so called “pain” the dr is causing you is brush and floss!!!!!! HELLO!!!!
by the way in which profession are you in miss suggestsmagic? we can have negative voices for you as well…
Hehe… I had a horrible experience with a dentist in first grade… I couldn’t keep my mouth open “wide” enough, and she hit me, causing the clamp she had over my tooth to cut my inner cheek. I also founde out as an adult, I had the misfortune to have six wisdom teeth, rather than the usual four. What a raw deal!!! I didn’t realize until I was thirty that people actually went to the dnetist voluntarily for a “cleaning”. I get anxious every single time I have to sit in a dentists’ chair, but i also do NOT blame every dentist I see for the actions of that first psychotic idiot i saw when I was five years old.
I am curious… what is the profit margin for a dentist? ie…What does it actually cost to do a filling, compared to what is charged for it????
First off i am not a dentist. but i have been in the dental field for many years. to calculate the profit margin for a dentist is a little complicated. but i will just use the office i work at for this example. my Doctor has been practicing for about 12 years. and i must say i think he is one of the best dentists that i have worked with.
so to break down the profit margin one must calculate all the expenses that are involved.
we have a beautiful dental office that has 8 operatories. the building was recently built and the cost for the building was about ($1.2 million). the set up and Dental Equipment for the office was about another ($1 million). so that is just the start up cost.
Employee payroll cost: is about ($35K per/month).
Supply Cost: our doctor orders every 3month to save because we get a bulk discount but still the supply cost each month is about ($40K per/month)
building maintenance and gas, electric, security, office supply, professional licencing, continuing education, dental lab fees and all the other stuff that is part of any business is added.
So when it all boils down a real good Dental office that is running efficiently with minimal waist has an overhead of about 65-70%, that is not including the Doctors own salary.
so lets say you get a Crown that is $1000 your doctor will make a profit of about $300 for 3-4 hrs of work.
Just to clear things up…TMJ is not a condition, it stands for Temporal Mandibular Joint. The dentist needs you to keep your mouth open because your teeth are in your mouth ad if you close your mouth your saliva will touch the area he’s working on and will have to start over. And he works fast but efficient because he knows it’s not comfortable for you. therefore he/she has your best interest at heart. And the painkillers are for your tooth not your jaw.
You don’t need teeth to be happy or prosperous or a well respected member of the community. Have all your teeth ripped out, and then you won’t need to go to the dentist. It is an instant fix for TMD too. Smoke and suck as many candies and chocs as you like. Blenders are cheap.
My favourite pick me up is steakburger soup with the lot. I laugh at those “greedy” dentists
every day, when I grimace in the mirror.
I say ” Suck that, you greedy bastards! Just try and rip me off now. ”
Suggestsmagic, I suggest we start our own club ” Suckers United ” our motto could be ” We suck “. Our mission statement could be ” to make the dentists of the world redundant”
That would be the ultimate revenge, hey. What a waste of all that expensive education.
When we have set the world free from the tyranny of dentists and their evil ways,
noone would ever be able to criticise us for looking like a bunch of dumbass stupid underachievers with poor grammar ever again.
You sound like you had some bad experiences, but don’t you dare call us all greedy bastards. Most of us really care about our patients. Some of us work our asses off and barely make a living because of all the regulations and overhead. I give too much away because of people like you who make me feel like I have to apologize. Owning a small business can be a nightmare, but I take pride in supporting several families. Next time, think before you make general derogatory statements and leave the diagnosis to the professionals.
Learn to spell and learn the difference between there, their, and they’re before you comment on the validity of a dentist. Thank you.
Are you my English teacher? NO! No no no, thank you.
Yes, having your jaw open for too long can give you a headache, but to say it would cause TMJ is just funny. TMJ is caused by over use of the jaw joint. it is not because you kept your mouth open for maximum of 2 hrs one day in your life time. that’s like saying if you run once for 1hr you get a knee injury.
but must likely the discomfort that you are feeling in your jaw after your appointment, is the injection that your dentist gave you to make your appointment more comfortable.
Or if you feel like you have been open for too long just ask for a break. I know your dentist would love to give you a break rather than bending in every direction trying to just get a glimpse of the working site.
I don’t hate the dentist, but I do fear going. Sorry, I still have those shrill-sounding implements from childhood in my head.
Your dentist probably doesn’t hate you either, rumpydog
I think many of us understand fear and are very sympathetic to it. I always used to tease my patients that there were probably other places they’d rather be than in my chair. As long as we can laugh together a little bit, it makes the visit a lot easier. Have you ever tried the laughing gas aka nitrous oxide? It really helps some people with anxiety.
HI Rumpydog type real person
I am with you on this. Believe it or not, I am a dentist.
i think dentists should get on the receiving end each year just to keep them honest and empathetic. but then I’m a bit different.
My suggestion is simple and easy. Wear some close fitting dark glasses like motorbike riders wear. It is amazing how this makes you feel removed from what is happening.
AND wear some noise cancelling headphones. Not earplug type , I mean full cuff over the ear old fashioned sort but with noise cancelling technology. Cuts out that aweful whine of the drill and the horrible pervasive sucking sound.
Make sure your dentist has something on the ceiling to focus on.
DONT close your eyes !! this just makes you more jumpy and anticipating that something aweful is going to hppen. establish upfront signals like that nice Dental Assistant suggested to Suggestmagic that enable you to feel IN CONTROL.
Dentists work really hard, Its not that easy drilling 50micron accuracy on a moving target.
But ultimately it is your mouth and you are paying for the benefit of excellent dental care.
so it is not unreasonable for you to set the agenda and feel in control.
I tell my patients that > ” You are the driver, I am just the navigator” ” I am here to help you. You are the one in charge of how we spend your time and money ”
It is not that hard. when you treat people like real people, and ask for and give mutual respect, I have found over 30 years that very few people abuse the relationship of trust and care. Thos e very few that do … maybe they are having a tough time, a bad day or just need to grow up more. Suck it back and move on. I love dentistry and my patients
( even if they dont love me sometimes )
Hi,
Yep I’m another one that fears the dentist, I don’t say a word, but I grip the chair arms like you wouldn’t believe, and I’m sure the fear is showing all over my face, especially the eyes, and that’s before the dentist has even looked at my teeth.
Loved the post, it’s good for a change to see things from the other side of the chair.
Thanks, magsx2! I really wanted to share the other perspective. It’s not really the fear that bothered me so much as a dentist, but it was the way people treated me as a result of their fear. We really just want people to be comfortable in the chair. I hope you have a dentist that does that for you!
“The way people treated YOU as a result of their fear!!!!” Do you have any comprehension of what empathy entails? Well i guess not otherwise you wouldn’t be spouting such garbage as you have done. i’m glad you’ve moved on to other pastures that leaves less chance of further patients being subjected to the selfish principles of another uncompassionate fuck wit and perpetuating this cycle of dentist on one side and the patient on the other. all the luck with your new beginnings.
So, it’s not selfish to be disrespectful of someone who’s trying to help you? Dentists aren’t deserving of the respect that should be shown to any human being, just because people don’t like what we do for them?
Every dentist I know does their damnedest to make a procedure as comfortable as possible, and to provide the best treatment they can. All of my patients, even the ones who annoy me, are treated with respect. All I ask is the same in return.
Who’s putting the dentist on one side and the patient on the other again?
Sandra, thanks so much for your constructive and informative comments on the topic.
@i fear for you… hahahaha ‘selfish principles of another uncompassionate f***wit’ rich coming from someone with such mastery and command of the king’s english… empathy is one thing, dealing with crap off people is another. But judging from your comments, you have a sense of entitlement and would probably expect someone to respond to your foul mouth with compassion and sympathy with something along the lines of “oh ‘i fear for you’, i get a sense of displeasure from your comments about my post, how does it make you feel, did your step father touch you in inappropriate ways”. Dentists are not payed to be psychologists. Yes we are empathetic, but no we did not pick dentistry to address people’s psychological problems.
Lovely friend,
Please ask your dentist if he performs procedures under minimal oral sedation. takeing small dose of benzodiazepine under complete supervision of your dentist is the best way to go about it. You will have a very enjoyable visit and feel no stress, therefore, your healing time would be a lot shorter becasue you have not had the anxiety. Hope you enjoy your next visit
This is a great post!!! So funny and yet so true! Glad you wrote it b/c I am guilty of a couple of these – but I will work on it!
Thanks, Boy Mom Blogger! It’s good to get the dialogue going, and these are things we can never say to our patients! Just be friendly to your dentist, and all of those things are easily overlooked!
I was just glad that I only could tick off 1 of these annoyances. That x-ray/bite down thing is just way too much for my gag reflexes. I am hoping this gives me a 94% Dentist Likes Me Score.
Haha! Some people do legitimately have that gag reflex– I forgot about that one. That may have to appear in a future post! It sounds like your dentist likes you! A 94% is an A, right?
There’s also those people (like me) who have those extra little bone bumps in their jaw. On the opposite side of the bone from the canines. They’re not bone spurs… Can’t remember what my dentist called them.
@JonB,
They’re called “tori” (singular is “torus”), and yes, they can make it very difficult for some people to bite down on x-ray films. Sometimes physically impossible.
My husband had a peanut stuck underneath/between his bilateral mandibular tori once. I was at the office busy working my ass off fighting cavities so he decided to take care of it by fashioning a small tool made out of a couple of toothpicks to remove it! He said it took forever and almost had to see me with a “TA”. This would have been my first peanut removal treatment……not sure how much to charge my husband in the future if it happens again. Anyone?
I’ve been practicing dentistry for over 17 years and I love dentistry. Yes, it is back breaking work but it is so rewarding when patient’s smile and appreciate our hard work. When patient’s throw up on you, bite your finger, come in with thier tuna fish sandwich in between their teeth and gums…….no that is not fun. We don’t deal with life or death situations daily but many times, I was the one who pulled the thorn out of the tiger’s paw and became their “life saver”. I had a fisherman who was at sea for more than a month with a terrible toothache and nobody to help him. He came into the office as soon as he was on land with a very loose tooth (mobility +3) and smelled like a very ripe fisherman. He was so happy I was able to remove his tooth without pain, he came back later on that day with a big bag of fresh scallops already shucked and a big hug. That was one of my most awesome dental moments.
This forum is making me laugh because it reminds me of when I get together with my dental friends, all we do is talk about dentistry and it is our only way to vent some of the frustrations. I bet you were an awesome dentist who just burned out too early. You can always come back to it after a break. Dentistry will always be there for you. There is
Good luck Lolabees!
too much decay
JonB– yes. I have seen people with tori under their tongue that cover the whole floor of their mouth. It is physically impossible to get x-rays on them so we do our best– and yes we understand!
ddsmile– I love to hear that dentists love practicing dentistry. I wish I did too– I still love it, but I just don’t love practicing it. Those patient stories like the one you told are the best. I love most of my patients. It was so hard for me to leave because I felt like I was abandoning them. And I did make sure to give them my best all the time. Patients want and deserve to have someone like you as their dentist. Thank you so much for the encouragement, and I’m so happy you are having as much fun with this as I am!
Someone had to say this… Back in the good old days, they were really BAD old days for going to the dentist. No air drills–just RRRrrr RrrRrr RRRrrr–vibrating and grinding, seemingly forever. Leaky syringes for anesthesia that left your mouth tasting awful. Much more time sitting in wretchedly uncomfortable chairs drowning in your own saliva because there were no spiffy little suction devices. I can’t say I love going, but I’m happy as a clam to have my own teeth in good working order. And happy I never have to rinse and spit with numb puffy lips ever again.
Kristy, my favorite ones are the patients that have experienced this kind of dentistry or worse and are now so appreciative of how good they have it now!
Had one of those experiences! And my dentist happened to be my grandpa! It was when he didn’t numb me at all for a filling…I KNEW it was time for him to retire. I didn’t hate him though
Good thing you didn’t hate him!
It’s great to be able to see the other point of view, to walk a mile in the dentist’s shoes. Thanks for enlightening us.
Thanks, WPW! If we could all find a way to walk in someone else’s shoes…
This post is hilarious – thanks for writing it, it’s good to hear the perspective from the other side of the bright light!
My last trip to the dentist was actually quite nice – it was my first trip in 12 years, and everyone in the office came by to see the miracle of healthy my mouth was. I also made the hygienist nauseous by telling her a Mitch Hedberg joke. Have you ever heard his stuff? He once said, “I have so much tartar, I don’t have to dip my fish sticks in s**t.”
Thanks, Noel! It’s good to see that it’s a welcome rant! Glad to hear that your last trip to the dentist was so successful– I hope that means you’re doing something right
Haven’t heard that joke, but I’m pretty sure I’ve seen that mouth before. Thanks for sharing it. Ewww!
News flash: TMJ is not a disease, it’s a joint. Hence the name temporomandibular joint. We all have two TMJs. What you were trying to refer to was TMD, a disease of the joint. This should be #12, patients that say that the dentist gave them TMJ. No, idiot, you were born with a TMJ.
Thank you, Monica! Exactly what I was going to address in a future post… well, one of the things
I am a dentist and was going to say the same thing….
I like that… what she said! Thanks for chiming in, Jason!
This was absolutely histerical! Seriously just made the rest of my work day better. Cheers!
Awesome! I’m so glad you liked it, and I assume you had at least 1 of those 10 things happen to you today???
Very nice…did not leave anything out!! Thanks for airing it out
Thanks, Pedro! And you’re very welcome. Trust me, it was my pleasure. Although, I’m sure I could think of a few more things if put up to the challenge
As you know, I’ve always been frightened of going to the Dentist. But I figure that teeth are something that I just wouldn’t be happy without! So, it’s a case of grin and bear it for me! I try to be a good compliant patient… Thanks for your thoughts on this subject, and I’m happy to you have made a decision that is good for you!
You’ve got it right, and you are a good patient! I should know!
Yes, You provided me with some of my best dental work! Thanks!
I think you are my long lost twin. I am almost 10 years into this dentist thing and MAN would I love to get out. I’ve worked in a high end small group, a corporate chain, a large high volume group, and now have my own practice. How did you do it? How did you get out? I have only just found your blog from this newest post, I think I have a lot of reading to do. I think you might be living my dream life? Seriously, this just blew my mind. Also, love the hair (looked at your last post too)
Natalie, thanks so much! It’s so reassuring to know that there are other people out there that feel the way I have felt for so long. Making the change was so hard, but so worth it! I was planning on writing my whole story through this blog, and now I will do it for sure! Email me anytime! Good luck– you can do it!
I would like to e-mail you, I really want to pick your brain. You have to understand for a Food Network/Travel Channel/HGTV junkie who hates being a dentist, your story has really got me thinking. My wheels are spinning in my brain. You are living the life now! How do I find your e-mail to contact you? I have to confess I’m new to this whole WordPress scene. I love how this has completely exploded on Facebook overnight. You’re going viral!
Sorry to hear you ‘re looking to leave dentistry. I’ve been practicing for 26 years and love it! My advice is to go and take some courses at LVI. They have many stories of dentists who felt as you do, and now wouldn’t leave for anything! Being able to rid a patient of a lifetime of pain is immensely gratifying!
Thanks, John! Believe it or not, I am sorry to be leaving dentistry too. I wish I wanted to stay, but it’s just not the right match for me. It’s like breaking up… “it’s not you, it’s me.”
I did do a lot of courses at Pankey, and I loved them. I thought I would be able to turn it around with that education, but in the end, it wasn’t enough. So glad you love it– we need people like you!
I’m a dental assistant and studied at LVI it was very rewarding and changed the way I look at dentistry! You don’t know what you don’t know!
Very funny!! So true!! Thanks for sharing!!
Thanks for visiting!
It’s really impressive to see you walking away from dentistry, Hats off to your courage. I am a dentist myself and I feel you on all your points. I was so tempted to walk away as well but I wasn’t brave enough. So after 6 years of general dentistry,I still have hope that maybe after I’m done with endo residency things will change or maybe i’m just temporarily running away
Thanks, Sarah! It was definitely not easy, and I tried to stay just like you are. It took me 10 years. Hopefully you’ll love endo, but if not, it’s never too late!
I am a periodontist and you are my hero!
Dave, thanks SO much! Funny– the only other person who said that to me is a periodontist friend of mine! All the things we wish we could say, right?
Lolabees, i loved your post, it was hilarious. So true for many dentists out there that probably think it but will never have the courage to say it out loud. I have been an office manager for over 9 years and have heard every one of these comments at least once or twice a day. We have done the best we could to re-educate the patients, be kind to them in hopes that they would return that. In most cases, we want to think that we have succeeded. However, there’s always that percentage of people that feel like crapping on your day just to make sure they’re not the only miserable ones. Well said, I commend you for your courage.
I have a curiosity, why did you leave dentistry? You really disliked that much? I saw you travel a lot but I’m curious, did you go back to school or have a total career change?
For all the patients out there that fit at least 1 out of the 10 listed above, no worries, we’ll tolerate you. However, we’ll never love you unless you love us!!! Something to think about
Manager! Well said! You make really great points, and you said them so beautifully. We do try so hard to educate, and we do succeed with many. The career was that wrong for me. I did have a change, and I am helping people lose weight. More on that later
And you are great at your new career! Changed my life!
Thanks, Deb! You did all the work! It was so rewarding and such a blast for me to help facilitate that
I love this post, u go lolabees
. I’m a dental assistant and can get a little blunt with a patient that may work my nerves, like the ones with the jacked up mouth and blame the dentist for not being able to make a mountain out of a mole hill in a day. Ugh, but for the gaggers i give tell them a trick i learned in school, breathe through your nose, it works 95% of the time, but you have have your ones that don’t want to listen to the assistant b/c of well we are the assistant. But 1 patient who has always had a gagging problem at every dental office shared how happy and comfortable she was for me taking her x-rays. She stated that i need to share that trick because it definitely helps a lot. So for all you gaggers, please believe we are not trying to clean your vomit so please breathe deep in and out your nose. And lolabee, you are a breathe of fresh air.
Wow, thanks Annie! Isn’t it great when we make huge breakthroughs with 1 patient… and they are appreciative! Those were the precious moments that made it so worthwhile for me. Until they didn’t!
I have a very effective trick for gaggers (in addition to breathing in and out through the nose). If I’m taking radiographs then I ask the client to first curl the toes of there right foot… count to three, release and then curl there toes on there left foot. Then of course they would repeat until the picture is done. If I’m taking impressions then I ask the client to lift the right foot up, count to five then put it down and then lift the left foot for five seconds and repeat as needed. It’s proven to be very effective for even very strong gaggers.
Thanks for the tip, Polly! Hopeully others can use it to get the job done and at least try to make sure our patients are comfortable.
Haha, I liked your post! Nice to hear the opposite perspective, I’m glad you liked my post and that it inspired you!
Wow, RHC! It looks like we’ve made a pretty good team on this one!!!! We should do it again
Hooboy. I definitely am not a fan of visiting the dentist and still haven’t found one I like. One of them insulted me, another said she ONLY uses the most expensive things which my insurance does not cover. But I brush my teeth before I go, and I floss sometimes! I’ve heard hygienist horror stories about people with gingivitis and other horrible mouth issues where their teeth are rotting out and haven’t been to a dentist in years. And yet, someone still offers to clean their teeth and help them get it fixed. I wouldn’t wish that job on my worst enemy. Glad you could get that off your chest. Good luck in your new career!
Thanks, rubysongbird! You are not alone! I do hope you can find a dentist you like. The friendship between a dentist and a patient is a really cool thing! Maybe I can help you find someone in your town?
My favorites:
“Doc, I’d rather have a baby than go to the dentist.”
“I’m allergic to epinephrine.”
“Novacaine doesn’t work on me.”
“My last dentist had to put his knee in my chest to get the tooth out.”
“My roots are wrapped around my jawbone.”
“I had a bad experience as a child.”
“My insurance covers 100%.”
“Are you sure this gas is all the way up? I don’t feel a thing.”
“I lost my Vicodin prescription, can you write me another?”
Rich, this is perfection! Thanks for adding a bunch that I forgot about! I love how we can all get together like this!
Oh! You forgot…
“The baby leeched all the calcium out of my teeth.”
This one might be an Alabama special. Great post!
Nice! Thanks for adding!
Lol, I hear the same thing in South Africa!
It’s oddly reassuring to know this is universal! Thanks for reading!
Meghan, I’ve practiced in Virginia and West Virginia, and I’ve heard the same thing both places, so it’s not just Alabama.
The baby line’s my favorite! I always wish I could say, “Well great! Go get knocked up and brush and floss your damn teeth!”
If a patient’s mouth is really jacked up I can’t help but think with their halitosis and mountains of plaque how could someone handle kissing them long enough to make a baby? Terrible I know but we’re being honest, right?
Maybe there was no kissing? Haha!
I’ve thought the exact same thing. And people with lousy oral hygiene are often lacking in hygiene practices in other parts of their bodies, too. Blech!
Meghan, the baby leeching has also spread to Colorado and Pennsylvania…seems like its almost as big an epidemic as childhood caries. Toothfairy, I agree 100%. In the past year I have seen no less than 12 pregnant women 27 or younger who needed all of their posterior teeth (and sometimes more) extracted and think to myself, “Good Lord, who would kiss this?” Then I feel bad because I know that they are going to pass this gross bacteria on to their innocent child. Literally the kid didn’t have a chance, and will go on to say it was “bad genes.”
One thing that really makes me hate a patient, though, is when they STINK! I mean smelling like cat pee, severe BO, smoke that permeates throughout the office and offends other patients. Not to mention that no mask can defend a dentist of an assistant from such an odor.
Sandra, just got that one. Hilarious!
How about ” do i get a credit cause I dont have insurance”?. or “Do I have to pay for that today”?. I really love it when the patient has, like you said before, needed treatment for a year or so, tooth started bothering two weeks ago, and they are in agonizing pain. But….when you tell them a time you have available they ” are at work, can I come later”?. if we say we have time to see you at 1 we mean 1. our schedule is already full. why should I work late or through my lunch because you don’t like to have fillings and put it off?
Yup. If I’m sick and call my doctor’s office for an appointment, I take what I can get. It’s MY emergency, not hers, and not her other patients’, who would have to wait if she sees me when she doesn’t really have time to work me in.
Pain is a great motivator to see the dentist. But patients create the thing they fear the most by not acting until they are in pain. No reason you should accommodate patients who choose not to act unless they are in pain. You don’t have to support that behavior if you don’t want to. You know the State Farm commercial where the guy (Jerry) calls his old agent when he’s in an accident – “I’m sorry Jerry, you switched your insurance and I can’t help you”….Same in the case of an “urgency” (if it was truly an emergency, they would go to the ER). You empathize, offer the options you have and they get to decide. With your support, they could experience a shift in their thinking in the future – ie: “Terry, you expressed that you want to avoid pain at all costs. If you don’t ever want to go through that again, we recommend (fill in the blank).”
That one has always gotten me. If it is truly an emergency, they will come when you tell them you can see them. I don’t know of a single dentist that doesn’t offer to get an emergency in the day they call. That’s customer care.
The first thing that came out of a root canal patient of mine was this: “there were 2 things I fear most in life child birth and going to the dentist. I already had a kid, now I have to see you. ”
it makes all the difference when patients appreciate you work and admit they were tiresome.
I just had to smile and nod thinking oh brother! However, when we were finally done I got a huge ” thank you for putting up with me, I know I’m a psyco path patient!”
Now that comment made my day
I agree! Remember those moments when you need it to keep you going. Thanks for sharing!
Another is “I did not have time to brush my teeth.” My reply has been “that’s alright, I don’t have time to wash my hands.”
Are you recently retired? Congrats!
Howard W WalkerDDS, LOVe your reply to the patient that didn’t have time to brush his/her teeth! I am a practicing Dental Hygienist of 20+ years. I may have to use that line myself. I did have a patient once that every time he came in to get his teeth cleaned, informed me that he didn’t brush because he knew I was going to clean them. Unfortunately, I didn’t have an answer at the time as I was a “beginner” in my career.
I do wish I could retire too!! I practice in an “unconventional” setting, and have no desire to practice in private practice. So once I do retire I will no longer be interested in doing any dental hygiene work. Congratulations to both of you on your retirement~~ ENJOY!!!
Rich and lolabees, I love this. I hear these all the time. I’ve said the “It’s ok, I forgot to wash my hands” one before. They give me the funniest looks.
I have never heard that one. How cute and funny!
Oh, my front tooth here is a crown (as they point to a 30 year old monochromatic PFM that is 5 shades to light)
That’s funny.
Great post. I’m also a dentist and almost fell out of my chair reading this. Im ready to post this in my waiting room. What are you doing now??
Thanks, Mark! This is so wonderful that people are having such a good time with this! Right now I’m having a blast connecting with a bunch of dentists who finally feel heard! No, I think you mean with my career– I am helping people lose weight. Will have more on that later
I have just come back from my 2nd visit to the dentist in two weeks. I am numb, my jaw hurts but I no longer have a mouth full of amalgam fillings and I love my clean, whiter smile. The discomfort and short lived pain was so definitely worth it! Not only is a routine check up at the dentist a smart one for aesthetic reasons, but bad oral hygiene is also detrimental to the health of the whole body.
I’m wondering if people who go under the knife for plastic surgery also have a fear and distain for their surgeon?
Maureen, it’s so great to hear this perspective! You have hit the most crucial part of all: our whole health is dependent on our oral health. I always say, “you know, the mouth IS connected to your body!” I’m glad you value this, and your dentist probably loves you!
Great post – so much truth there – it needs to be posted on every dentist’ wall – right where the patient can see it… maybe on the ceiling above the chair!
One thing though… #8… if you were spending hours making a crown fit – you were using the wrong lab! A good lab that knows what they are doing is dedicated to helping you have a great day – not the other way around. Our crown seats take 20 minutes or less with virtually no adjustments.
Thanks, J Bear! Yes, I agree about the lab. Years ago we had major problems with our lab work and it was the worst. Now in recent years, I’ve worked with a great lab, and they do beautiful work. But, if you factor in prep time, patient management time, lab time and seat time there is a whole lot of TLC that goes into making something fit perfectly for the patient.
That was just awesome! Thank you.
Thank you, and you’re very welcome– it was awesome for me too!
Great list. Things I’ve had to bite my tongue and not say for over 40 years in practice. Here’s another one. “My insurance won’t pay much on a crown – just do a big filling.” They are letting some insurance secretary that hasn’t seen their mouth diagnose and treatment plan what dentistry they need.
Oh, so very true, Curt! Doesn’t it feel good to just let it out! Congrats on 40 years in the biz– impressive!
Thank you for posting this Lolabees! You’ve taken the words right out of my mouth. Another thing I hate is when the patients complain, “I don’t know why I get cavities. I brush my teeth everyday,” and yet their plaque levels indicate that it’s been weeks since they’ve brushed. Talk about lying through your teeth!
You’re welcome, Diane! We have a way of simply knowing, don’t we? Thanks for adding to the list!
I spend most of my time with the dental hygienist for routine cleanings. My dentist barely makes a cameo; and is usually working on someone else. I guess when your teeth are straight, healthy and clean; there’s no need to hate, fear, despise, or complain to your dentist about anything. However, I think anything as invasive, uncomfortable and painful (yes, there is ALWAYS pain involved) as dental work will ubiquitously rank as an undesired and unwanted chore of human maintenance. That’s just the way it is; and the fallout from those negative perceptions are forever attached to the dentists’ career.
Thanks, Bob! Glad you don’t have the negative experiences yourself. However, while I’ll agree that it is invasive, it is not true that it is ALWAYS painful. These are stereotypes and only true in a few cases. You’d be surprised by how many people left my office saying that it wasn’t as bad as they thought it was going to be. Still a negative slant, but I’ll take it! Also, many people who have a lot of dental needs are still lovely people and do not possess any of the 10 qualities on my list. Life is about choices, and we choose how to react to what we need to do to maintain our health. Thanks for adding in the non-dentist perspective! I hope you continue to have great dental health! I always say, “you never want to get to know your dentist too well!”
I agree with Lolabees here on this one. I’ve had plenty of patients say that they didn’t even feel pain during the injection or the drilling. Everybody has a different reaction.
Wow lolabees! Way to have a voice from the other side. One of the things that has always bothered me is how negatively most people perceive and talk about the dental profession, and thus our (yes, I am one) POV is just “not worthy”. I’m sure many dentists have had many, if not all, the thoughts you’ve pointed out here :p
Congrats on the career change; I believe life is too short to be doing something that makes you unhappy. Looks like you are enjoying yourself much more now
Would love to hear the hows and the whys of the transition, I find them interesting, Also the writing. I’m a fan (of writing) as well.
Wish you continued luck and joy.
PS: You may consider adding an email address/contact form on your blog
Thanks, Ritu! I love your website! What a great way for people to connect. Yes, I think I’ve struck a chord with many in this post. Don’t we all wish to be heard?!? Thanks for the kind words, and I will take your PS advice. This whole thing blew up in a way I never would have expected!
Well, there’s more coming….I put in on my Twitter feed and saw it on a couple others’ later on as well…..Enjoy the limelight!
And thanks for checking out my website. I have another that you might enjoy since you like humor:
http://raodentistry.wordpress.com/
BTW, would love to chat more sometime…hence the request for an email address:)
Keep doing what you’re doing!
Is it true that dentists have the highest suicide rate of any profession?
Great question! I don’t know, but I have always heard that. I tried to do a search on it a while back and never came up with anything. I wouldn’t be surprised though, because it is a very high pressured career. Can anyone weigh in on that?
Fantastic blog lolabees!
I have not heard about dentists having the highest suicide rate, but I have heard dental technicians do. This question did make me curious, so I looked it up on the American Psychological Association’s website and they claim….. “But experts on suicide say that statistics on its relation to occupation are not clear. There is no national data set on occupation and suicide. Local studies indicate elevated rates in different occupations, but the data usually “turn out to be frail,” says prominent suicide researcher David Clark, PhD.
And in fact, points out Ronald Maris, PhD, director of the Center for the Study of Suicide and Life-Threatening Behavior at the University of South Carolina, “Occupation is not a major predictor of suicide and it does not explain much about why the person commits suicide.”
I still maintain my CDA/LDA, but have not practiced in 8 years now. I don’t know how many times I would say to a patient who would say to me ” I hate the dentist” and I would look at them and say something along the lines of …”Boy, it’s a good thing I am not the dentist then huh”… just to lighten it up a bit and get them to be more comfortable.
http://www.apa.org/monitor/jan01/suicide.aspx
That is actually not true. However, if you consider the fact that dentists are generally over achievers, otherwise they would not have been able to complete the education required for the profession, the criticism they draw from some of their patients is enough to push anyone over the edge.
Thanks, doc! Wonder where that stereotype came from?
Hi, I am a dentist too… i would like to add to your points (perhaps number 12) that some patients burst on us if the treatment does not go accordingly or if there is temporarily some discomfort (despite the pre-warnings). The patients need to understand that most issues are resolvable if only they can sit patiently and discuss this with their dentists’. This only creates a crack in the Dentist-Patient relationship and sometimes the patient may forget it (once the issue is resolved) but the dentist may feel it for days to come.
On the flip side… we dentists are human too… I want the patients to know that if you have a concern (like pain after treatment), we are truly concerned and it saddens us too. For all the drill noise haters… your dentist and companies are working towards catering your needs. It’s just a matter of time. Imagine the old times where the “doctor” hammered holes into teeth and our ancestors extracted teeth with no anaesthesia. We are in a better era and better is coming up still.
And please.. It’s not always about THE MONEY !!!
Apologies for being rude Lolabees.. but I forgot to praise your blog. I am 35 and my specialty is Restorative Dentistry and I prefer to do more Endodontics. I have a lot to experience as a practitioner. I find this a very interesting read and have experienced all that you have mentioned. Thank you for voicing it out. I am putting this up on Facebook for others to read
Rude? No way! I just did cartwheels over your other comment! Thanks for sharing your experiences, and thanks for the praise (that’s always accepted!) Thanks also for sharing it on facebook. I am astounded at how many people are moved by this! It feels so good to finally express how we feel.
Amen, Dr! Well said, and kudos to you for adding such valuable insight into this discussion. THANK YOU!!!!!
This is a funny list, good thing I really like my dentist!
Thanks– it makes you exempt, right?
I LOVE the dentist! (and the clean, smooth feeling of my teeth after they are cleaned!). Thanks to dentists all over the world! I also typically spend most of my time with the dental hygienist, but the final check up of my dentist is pleasant, too. If I don’t understand the dental jargon, I um…I dunno…ask..isn’t that how you usually find out information? ;D She’s always happy to answer, too!
Thanks, Amanda! The world is so lucky to have people like you in it! I will speak for all dentists when we say we appreciate you, and you are probably the bright spot in your hygienist’s and dentist’s day!
Dentists are funny
Do you mean funny funny or weird funny?
I want to photocopy this and give it to all of my patients!
Wouldn’t that be great? Not sure if that would go over too well
I think that’s why so many of us are so fired up about this!
Absolutely fantastic
Thanks!
I just love the way you find the time to reply to every single comment that people post and you’re always so nice, positive and smiley! Keep making these emails pop into my inbox!
Thanks, cazbag! I committed to myself that I would! I’m so appreciative that people are taking the time to join in the discussion.
Hilarious! I love #5. I always tell my patients, “I can only do good work on good patients”. Those people who can’t/won’t open wide enough for me to see properly don’t necessarily get my best work!
Isn’t that the truth! It’s fun when we can say those very true things with some humor to our patients.
and they blame u at end it its not perfect job !!
rami , dentist too
nice entry, enjoyed reading it and I am so guilty of the 1st one!
Thanks, Dave. Maybe in the future you can add, “but I really like you.”
too true
LolaB, I am disappointed in your post. how could you come up with only 10? LOL! j/k…Surely, there are tons more. I read the ‘redhead’s top 10 list, too’ jeez louyse! Believe me, when I do my career shift (5-10yrs forthcoming,) I’ll have plenty to say as well. congrats on following your hopes and dreams…now you get to give people smiles in a different way. mad love, P
Dr M-dog! So good to hear from an old friend! Haha! You’ll have to start taking notes so you can be my guest blogger when that day comes! Mad love right back at ya!
Epic. It’s so true with EVERYTHING. I’m a new dentist and people spend more time asking me how old I am or if I’m actually old enough to do dentistry then I spend telling them what’s going on with their mouth.
Though in response to #1, I once had a bad day during my first few days working. Patient said “I hate dentists, they all SUCK.” So I said to her (not jokingly either), “You know, I hate patients. All patients.” She looked at me and laughed when she realized how ridiculous what she and I had both said. We got along great after that.
That used to happen to me all the time until I found the perfect response. They’d say, “How are old you? Wow, you look so young?” My response: “I know, aren’t I so lucky?” They quickly saw that I was going along with it, and they started to have fun with it. It was weird because the more I said that, the less people questioned my age and experience.
Humor is the key– perfect way to handle a comment like that! #1 really got me for a long time. Your skin gets a little thicker the longer you are at it. Good luck to you– sounds like you’ll do great!
As a hygienist , when I hear that ” I hate the dentist” I reply, “Really? Wow, I haven’t heard that before, She’s a really great person and an awesome dentist! I’m really sorry you feel that way… I guess we’re okay though, Right? I’m just the hygienist. ” MOST people smile back, and recant, but a few get nasty and say, ” No, I don’t like you either/more”
Dead on. It’s a love-hate relationship dentists have with their patients. For over ten years now I have been helping dentists understand human behavior and why their patients do what they do and I hear the frustration! (Dentist; “Honestly, sometimes I just want to slap a patient upside the head!”) I believe it’s OK for dentists and their teams to challenge patients on this stuff – by replacing judgement and becoming curious, gaining trust and being honest. Yeah, it takes time and skill but how else will the patient’s perception of the dentist change? Thanks for your honesty and humor – and best of luck with your new career!
Thanks! What a great way to take a negative situation and make it positive. We all need your help– keep doing what you’re doing!
I always say, “Nobody likes the dentist….if you did, I’d worry about you.”
I like that. Sounds like my, “you really don’t want to get to know your dentist too well.” A little humor always helps, doesn’t it?
This is so cool ! I am a dentist too and I understand you 100% .You make my day today!
Thank you so much. And you mine!
I am going to copy your posting to my blog (full credits). Too good to pass up!
Thank you so much! Can’t wait to check out your blog!
Hi Lolabees… As a former patient of your.. who is in the profession (hygienist) and has had horrible experiences with the dentist… YOU are a GEM of a dentist. Intelligent, meticulous, funny and kind… the profession lost a great one when you changed careers. Also, this blog.. flipping hysterical.. Miss seeing your face around the corner and hearing you laugh.
Heidi, coming from one of the best hygienists out there, I take that as a huge compliment. Thank you for everything, always.
Thank you Lolabees.. Going to Virginia for the next two years… hope to do a little volunteer work at the VA to keep my “fingers wet”. However, when I return we will have to revisit old ideas, no??? Learning to scuba in February.. maybe see you down south, pura vida amiga. stay in touch.
Hey! I just read it and it feels so good to hear our part of the story too, me being a dentist aswell.
Kudos!
Thanks, Zain. That’s just it– we want to be heard too.
I am going to print this and share it with my clinic…. Thank you.
So glad you enjoyed it!
I dont disagree with your list but you come off like an asshole making a whole blog post about it. I dont see people who are waiting tables making FAR less than you complaining about the idiots they serve. Maybe try being grateful youve had the opportunities that youve had and even the opportunity to leave your job when so many are without.
Seriously… thats what you got out of this? You really missed the point.
Really? Someone expressing an opinion about their profession with humor and wit in response to someone else’s rant on their OWN blog is an “asshole”? Why don’t YOU express your crappy, negative opinions on your blog? Oh right, because no one will read it.
FYI, everyone complains, it’s human nature. And in your comment, you are doing the same.
So what does that make you?
So what does make you?
wow .. to be honest. you seriously didnt get anything from this farce. I pity you.
Actually, YOU come off as an asshole by posting this comment. To compare a dentist, who went through 4 years of undergraduate work, as well as 4 years of dental school, and then possibly additional schooling to specialize, which costs approximately $350,000++ (not including all the interest on student loans), to a waitressing job??? That shows how badly you did not understand this comedic article.
Do you really think waiters don’t complain about the idiots they serve who don’t tip them enough or who yell at them when the order is wrong?
She’s not being ungrateful by posting this, she’s just voicing an opinion about her profession that she paid several hundred thousands dollar to get too. It’s not like this high-paying profession just falls into individuals laps; dentists work unbelievably hard and long for their degrees and the title of doctor.
I am completely guilty of saying I hate going to the dentist. I absoutly love my dentist! She does amazing work. I think as patients we look at our dentist appointment as a grade card on how well we take care of our own teeth. When we are told we have a cavity or need a root canal its like I’m being told I failed at doing something as simple as taking care of my own teeth:( So in al actuality its not the dentist I hate, or the appointment… It’s the results of how well we did our job in-between our visits to the dentist. I have to say as an adult I do a great job, but as a child I wasn’t so great at keeping up on my teeth. Therefore, visits were never great as a child which resulted in fearing the dentist and carrying that fear with me as an adult! So this is a learning experience for me also! I will never let the words “i hate the dentist” come out of my mouth again!
My dentist went out of her way to hand write a “happy birthday” letter to my daughter. My daughter loved writing her back and even invited her dentist to her b-day party! I love my dentist! And as for the comment of being rude, i am a server and I have posted blog’s about the top 10 things not to do to your server! All my server friends laughed and everybody else that read it learned something from it! Loved this post:) thanks for letting us see what its like to be in your shoes. Valuable info:)
Well said. Glad to see most of you got the point of this post.
@lesson learned– it is very obvious that you are NOT one of those patients on the list because it is obvious that you have compassion and care about those around you. I love to hear about how great your relationship is with you, your daughter, and your dentist! Thanks for sharing!
Don’t forget the Practice Payment Loans to pay back in order to start a practice from scratch–~$6k/mo. So in all actuality, after all the bills and the student loans and the practice loans, and how LITTLE the insurance companies actually pay their in-network dentists, a dentist DOES bring in about as much as a waitress. That’s why my husband had to get a second job. That’s what happens when you start your own practice a year before the economy tanked.
BTW: I loved the list SOOO TRUE!!!
Farce– It’s easy to point at different issues and say that because they exist, nothing else has the right to exist or be important for another person. Judgement comes very easily to many. The true strength comes in finding compassion where you might not think you are capable of finding it. And btw, this asshole didn’t have those opportunities. This asshole made them.
I used to wait on tables, and I made a lot more money doing that than in dentistry! They are both very stressful jobs, so letting off a little steam is a good thing. I used to tell hilarious stories about the patrons of my restaurant as well as my patients today. Just because we laugh and joke, does not mean we are not grateful….but I wish my patients were as grateful as I am! Ha Ha
I am a dental student and I agree with everything you just said! I have some of the rudest patients and I just bite my tongue and be polite. You know how chewed up my tongue is at the end of the day? Hurts more than your TMD. Lolabees what did you change your career to? I was thinking of paying off student loans and doing the same.
I’m in my 3rd year of dental school.
I was a dental student too and was going through this kind of conflict as well. In the midst of my 2nd year I decided to step away from dental school because I ultimately did not feel like I would ever be completely satisfied with my career choice (although I knew many students who were very happy in dentistry). Since I left dental school with pretty good grades, I was able to take my MCAT and apply to medical school. I am now going into my 3rd year of medical school and couldn’t be happier
From experience, I can honestly say it takes WAY more guts to walk away from a prestigious and expensive seat in dental school than to stick with something that you think will make you miserable. Good luck to you!
Haha! Once I paid off my loans, I felt free to do whatever! I am helping people lose weight now. My interests sort of evolved into traveling, eating
, cooking, and nutrition. It’s amazing to help someone get off of their diabetes meds. Not too different in that I still coach people with their health, but it’s just a lot less intense. Took a long time to find what I wanted to do though. Good luck! I hope you get to do what you like… and that may even be dentistry!
I’m a dentist myself, and enjoyed this
Every point you made is something I come across several times a week. In fact, I could add to the list!
I wish you well in your new endeavours!
Thanks, Renee! Glad you enjoyed!
I love the dentist. It takes me five minutes in the morning to brush, floss and use mouth wash. And it takes me five minutes at night. It only takes my dental hygienist thirty minutes to clean my teeth at the most. A little goes a long way.
Your dentist loves you too. And I bet he/she would still love you even if your teeth weren’t perfect
Is it rude to copy this and hand out to patients? Just kidding- this made my long day a little better!
I bet many would laugh right along with you, but maybe better not to take the risk. Glad it added some laughter to your day!
This is pretty awesome. I have friends who work in the dental field, and I’ve heard most of the horror stories, and love hearing them. I also have TMJD and hate dental visits because my jaw hurts at the end, but my hygienists have always been really nice about giving me breaks from holding my mouth open.
Thanks! We really do want you to be comfortable and always try to work with the specific needs of our patients. Thanks for sharing
You don’t see people waiting tables complaining about the people they serve? Funny, I’ve seen articles on just that. My office subscribes to Reader’s Digest for the waiting room, and every issue now contains a “Fifty Things Your — Won’t Tell You” column. So far, they’ve had quotes from dentists, physicians, nurses, teachers, and, yes, servers, off the top of my head. They can be quite entertaining, enlightening, and maybe even helpful, if people recognize negative behaviors in themselves and try to change.
Love this…..this sums it up!
I’m not a dentist, but I’m an office manager who has the unfortunate job of collecting the money. I find it unbelievable when people expect to walk out without paying anything, as if it doesn’t cost any money to run the office, as if I don’t have to pay the rent, the doctors, the assistants, the hygienists, the front desk staff, computers, phones, electricity, heat, and that lovely little toothbrush and floss we give you that no… we do NOT get for free. I love the grocery store comparison and use it frequently. The worst part is, they accuse us of being SO EXPENSIVE, except when it comes down to, (we’re an insurance based office) it’s THEIR INSURANCE that dictates how much we can even charge them! If you don’t like how much you have to pay, talk to your insurance company or your employer, not me. If after that you still think I’m overcharging you, I’ll also send you the supply bill and lab bill directly, bc that filling we just put in your mouth cost us $$$!
Bisou, I was so gratified a few weeks ago when I had a teenage girl in for an emergency visit. We have signs in our waiting room stating that patients will be charged if they don’t show for their appointments. The girl’s boyfriend read it and became indignant. But her mom said, “Well, they lose money when people don’t show up. It costs them just to open the door.” Some people GET IT. Of course, we never charge anyone who has an emergency or is sick, and we may let the charge slide altogether, if you’re not someone who repeatedly no-shows. It’s basically to remind patients that yes, it costs me money to be here. When you don’t show up, or don’t pay your bill, my assistant doesn’t jus say, “That’s all right, I’ll just work for free for a few hours.” The landlord still expects a rent check, and the electric company will turn my power off just like they do to anyone who doesn’t pay the bill. Add salaries, rent, utilities, materials etc. and it cost me about $60 per hour just to be open.
Folks, if I reserve a hotel room, and don’t show up, I STILL HAVE TO PAY FOR THE ROOM. And the hotel doesn’t care if I’ve had a family emergency or sudden illness. It costs money to be in business. Your dentist isn’t an exception.
Awesome Post!!!! I am a dentist that has thought about leaving the field many many times for some of these reasons too. I applaud your courage to find your path…. Its sad to say, but you are so invested in dentistry before you really realize its not all the $$$ and Dr this and Dr that you thought it would be. Even the main reasons of being a health care provider and serving our fellow man/woman gets tested from time to time. Ever hear of apathy burnout? Yep, its real and dentist feel it big time.
I left restorative dentistry of 6 years and did an Orthodontic residency. I am now 2 years out of that and it is somewhat better. I hear all the time about “ooooo rich orthodontist….” but no one takes account the hundreds of thousands of dollars it takes… the pressure in college to even get into dental school… the pressures in dental school for perfection … the hoops you jump thru for specialty training, etc. It really chaps my A$$ too when people (some) act like its not their mouth your working on… they take no ownership for their own oral health care and demand you “fix” them and then have the audacity to claim you are overcharging them by your fee…. nice, real nice!
Good for you Lolabees
Thank you! Another good point– taking responsibility for ourselves is so important. Even us dentists!
Oh, I am a pharmacist…I could complete this from a pharmacists point of view….the zingers are flying through my head! I <3 my dentists, oral surgeon, orthodontist, and peridontist—they rock! (the dude who did my root canal though, he can go to hades).
I would love to hear your point of view. I’m guessing maybe something a dentist or doctor does when we work with you would make your list! Maybe we’ll do a guest post one day! Thanks!
Love this!! I’m a hygienist and some of these points are true for our patients as well!! What I hate is when parents bring their kids in and threaten them with a shot or hold up the instrument packets and taunt them! I mean really parents?! No wonder your children are scared of us…
I take parents aside and politely tell them to knock it off when they do this. If they don’t take the hint, I get less polite. I do not appreciate them using me to discipline their child. For most kids, I can make this an easy, fun visit.
Parents, don’t make your kids scared of me. If you and they take care of their teeth, there will be very little chance they will ever have to go through anything painful in my office. You are traumatizing your child, and greatly increasing the chance that, should your child need work, it will have to be done by a specialist, in a hospital, under general anesthisia, because your child won’t be able to cooperate with me. You’re making it harder on me, your child, and yourself. Stoppit!
One of my favorites:
You cannot lay the chair back AT ALL. I cannot recline or I will stop breathing!!
How do these people sleep? Even a lazy boy reclines a little. I have patients who swear that going back at all cuts off their airway.
Thank you!!! I wonder this SAME thing myself!!!
One of my favorites is how they are so allergic to metal anything so you cannot possibly use any metal instruments in their mouths…but have rings on several if not all fingers!
I thought I would replay to this particular comment because for myself there are certain areas of my body I can not have certain metals touch because i am allergic in these areas, for instance I can wear cheap mentals such as nickle or sterling silver on my fingers and around my wrists, but put them around my neck or in my ears, and I swell up and break out in hives.. not defending the patient here, but perhaps could be the cause soemthing to consider and do research on.
What what– don’t worry, you can defend the patient here too
I hope every one remembers that this post and the comments really aren’t about us vs. them. Besides, we are patients too at some point; dentists and doctors can be some of our worst patients, and you know we’ve all said that before. I would bet it’s a similar ratio of great:bad patients to that of our non-health-care-provider patients.
Very interesting about your metal allergy. Thanks!
my favorite is listening to a patient say “i’m so afraid of needles” and ” i hate going to the dentist” as you are admiring the details of their full arm tattoo. never had a tattoo. but i’m pretty sure there is a needle involved and the arm wasn’t hurting so much that you needed one. dentistry is a funny complicated business in many ways!!
Awesome post, tdanz. Lots of those tatoo folks also have pierced tongues, guaged ears, you name it. All sorts of totally elective pain they have chosen to have inflicted on them, and pain much more severe than my 30-guage needle with topical anesthetic beforehand.
Wow! Dentist… We are popular. The best profession in the world. Lost the post. We love our patients though. They make our day and are the reason we are working.
We are definitely a polarizing topic, aren’t we? Who knew? Thanks for keeping it where this post was intended. And there’s nothing I love more than dentists who love and appreciate what they do!
Wow Lolabees. Did you ever think this post would stir up the responses you have gotten? After reading through the posts thus far the take home for me is this: Those darn patients get in the way of doing dentistry! Being a dentist would be great if people weren’t attached to their teeth but that’s not the case. If a dentist wants to stay sane and positive over their lifetime in the profession, it requires some serious behavioral skills. This area is rarely taught in dental school and it is often not considered in many practices but it is one of the most important factors in being successful.
I absolutely did not. I thought only my 40 friends, family, and new blogging friends would see it, have a chuckle, and forget all about it. It’s true– as a profession we need serious help in dealing with communication with PEOPLE (not just patients.) Ah, heck, we all do, not just dentists! Thanks for your comment!
This is great! My husband is a dentist and this gave me a real laugh. All so true!
Yay! It worked!
Oh behalf of me and probably everyone else, I sincerely apologize for probably all of that, except for #1 (I hope), I tend to not tell people, that have pointy and sharp objects in their hands, that I hate them/their job. But I completely agree, and am pretty sure I’m guilty of a lot of that.
Maybe so or maybe not. One thing I’m sure of is if you do any of that, you probably do it in a way that your dentist still loves you anyway– that does happen. I’m only guessing, but your ability to laugh at the list and admit that YOU might do these things shows me that you are able to walk through life without judging YOURSELF or others too harshly. I don’t know… just guessing? Thanks!
You forgot:
1) “Soft teeth run in my family, so it isn’t my fault my teeth are all rotten.” Enough said.
2) The patient who complains they hate needles, doesn’t let you give local, then whines and flinches when you try and work without anaesthesia at their request.
3) The patients who think that fluoridated water and amalgam fillings are giant conspiracies where dentists are trying to poison everyone. (These are usually the ones who keep coming back time after time because their “natural” white fillings are giving them post-op sensitivity–And it’s probably a good thing they don’t know that composite contains BPA!)
4) Complete strangers who, upon finding out you are a dentist, pop out their dentures in the middle of the grocery store while describing every past experience they have ever had with dentists…(These are the times I thank GOD I’m not a proctologist!)
5) Parents. “I don’t know why my 4-year-old has cavities in every tooth. He SAYS he brushes his teeth!” Followed by “I can’t get him to stop drinking pop. He doesn’t LIKE water.” Followed by “I don’t care that my kid is screaming, flailing and trying to grab the instruments out of your hand, and we aren’t leaving until this is done because we can’t afford to pay for sedation!” (I even heard someone tell their child “It’s okay dear, it’s totally normal to have teeth ripped out of your face. Look, mommy has had it done lots of times!”)
Good luck in your new career!
LOL @ #4!
5) I just refuse to work on the flailing kids. Parents, it’s UNSAFE. Unsafe for me, my assistant, and most of all for your child. Our handpiece (drill) goes a couple hundred thousand rpm’s, and it doesn’t have brakes. If your little one jerks, I could cut open his cheek, tongue, lip, or God knows what else. I know sedation is expensive, but so is reconstructive surgery.
I could go on all day about #2. First things first, kids are some tough mofos. They may cry about getting the shot but I give them the option of doing it without and only giving them the shot if they say it hurts. You’d be surprised at what these kids tolerate to avoid the shot.
Second, nobody likes needles. There’s no need to tell me, I hear it from everyone. In fact I have yet to meet a patient that has told me “Hey doc I love needles! Lets get anesthetized!”
My final gripe with this subject is the big tough looking dude with sleeves of tatoos that cries and whimpers when it’s time for the shot. You sit 3 hours for a tatoo but can’t sit still for a 10 second injection? Ridiculous!
Sacar- I like your comment, but all joking aside, I’m going to add that I actually like it when patients tell me that they are scared of the needle. If I know which part of the procedure really bothers them, I can give a little extra TLC, and we all leave happier– usually!
Thanks for joining in the fun! I bet you feel better too now
Hilarious!
I LOVE THE DENTIST! She tells me I don’t need to go back so often, but I can’t help it ;p
p.s. now my BFF is in dentistry LOL
Yay! Thanks for the love!
these are exactly the feelings of a dentist…i felt so relieved after reading it…
So glad to hear it!
Hi There
I’m certainly no doctor, but my dentist refers to my jaw popping/ aching as TMJ, as well. Just providing a bit of defense for us laymen folk.
Thanks for the post. I had no idea it was so horrible to be a dentist.
Perhaps your dentist is just telling you where the pain is coming from (your TMJ).
Thanks for adding. I’m sure some do.
Never really hated or feared the dentist myself … unfortunately, I managed to inherit very soft teeth and have to see mine fairly frequently, but the only thing I actually detest are crown fittings (that plastic goop tastes nasty and always tries to sneak down my throat, so I have to lean forward the whole time they’re taking the mold). I try to smile and joke with them and the hygienists … I figure they get abuse from other people all day.
… some people don’t brush before going to the dentist? Ewwwww …. why would they do that?
With that attitude, you will always do well at the dentist! Thanks for helping us help you. And we agree– impressions suck! You’d be surprised at how some people don’t brush…
I am a dental assistant.. I have been told a few times,” I knew I was coming to the dentist today so I didnt bother brushing because I knew the hygienist would be cleaning them anyway.” Really? Really? I don’t even know how to repsond when someone says that. I read this blog last night and had a good chuckle over it. At work today, after a few challenging patients, I jokingly asked my boss if he wanted me to print this off and start handing it out to a few patients. You have to be able to have a sense of humor in this job and be able to laugh it off.
im a dentist..and i really really love what i do…but unfortunately, i plan to work abroad as a dental assistant..recently applying for agencies and hirings online.. working here (Philippines) is not much of a success to me..
It’s like a doctor complaining about you being sick…
…or a restaurant complaining about you being hungry…
Stupid dentists. Shut up and actually do your job. You’re being well overpaid and then complain about doing what you’re supposed to do.
You really missed the boat on this one. She’s not complaining about her patients needing dental care. She’s simply saying that dentists are people too, and in a clever and fun way might I add. Doctors do complain about patients and waiters do complain about customers. Not because they’re sick or hungry but because some people are just clueless and jerks. I’m not even a dentist and I found this very entertaining and enjoyed hearing from the other point of view. Based on your response you appear to be a sad and angry individual. Lighten up.
Not at all Tamir. This dentist is telling you how it is to work in someone’s mouth who has no respect for other people. I doubt you would like to be told all day long “I don’t like you” at your work and the person saying that expecting you to do an A+ job on you afterwards. How would you like it if every time you tried to help someone prevent some serious disease down the road and they thumbed their nose at you until it became said problem?
It is all about respecting one another as human beings first. If you go into a restaurant and you tell your waitress that you really don’t like waitresses, what kind of service do you expect to get? Seriously people! The grass is not always greener on somebody else’s side of the fence nor is there a big ole dollar tree there either!
Tamir – you sound like a rude and very uneducated person. Coming from my personal experience as a dental nurse – if i had a dollar for the amount of times a patient has walked into the surgery and flat out told the dentist they hate them, or dislike them, i would be a millionaire. If you did that to staff at a restaurant you would most likely end up eating spit or other bodily fluids that night. Why is it that simply because someone holds the title “Dentist”, a lack of basic manners and kindness is allowed?? And may i remind you that Lollabee is posting this in reply to a post made on another blog titled “10 reasons i HATE dentists”…maybe if that person hates dentists they should simply stop going and when their teeth begin to give them pain or fall out, they have no one to blame but themselves. And just so you know Tamir – most dentists earn about 30 – 40% of what they earn grossly because of overheads. A relative of mine has just graduated from dentistry and now has a study debt of over $50,000 – and that is without any specialisation in a field such as orthodontics (braces).
It has nothing to do with being sick or hungry. It is about putting up with jerks in a professional manner and a small percentage of patients not realizing that dentists are people too. She’s not complaining, she is stating her point of view in a fun and enjoyable blog.
There are less than 250,000 dentists in the US out of over 300 million people. Becoming a dentist is not easy. How much we are paid is all relative to our own cost of doing business. I don’t think you are qualified in anyway to say that we are “being well overpaid”.
By the way, doctors do complain about patients and waiters do complain about customers. You probably aren’t aware of it because they are complaining about you…
More
ahh yes Tamir….internet is a wonderful creation. We can all hide behind an artificial barrier that gives us false sense of protection and bravery to accuse others destructively instead of channelling that focus into constructive comments. Please do reply and share your thoughts on how healthcare professionals should handle the aforementioned dilemmas dentists and physicians face daily. Let’s start with a emergency case (fortunately, it’s infrequent but is enough to dampen the emotional stability of the most psychologically trained professionals for the rest of the day).
patient: What do you mean you can’t pull the tooth today, I drove all the way here!
dentist: i understand you are in great pain and we worked hard to squeeze you into our fully booked schedule as an emergency walk in patient. However, my scheduled patients also deserves my full attention. If you were the other patients, you would feel the same way too. (dentist holding back the urge to criticize the patient’s lack of mannerism and COMMON courtesy because with great knowledge comes a completely different moral/ethical/professional standard by which people judge you).
patient: then I want you to reimburse my gas money!
dentist: __________________ (Tamir, please fill in the blank with a response that maintains professional integrity and is emotionally detached, it is harder than you think)
everyone, please chime in.
p.s. people are in general kind and well-meaning. Beyond the basic necessities what most people crave for is recognition and appreciation as has been proven by statistics in the Carrot Principle. Dentists, physicians, and people in general may be complaining only because they hope that they could just get a little more appreciation. One ill-mannered patient can ruin the day but so can one appreciative patient make you day. Tamir, you must yearn for the recognition from your peers, boss and family and friends. Don’t you?
Very well said! Thank you!
Once a patient had a toothache, called up, and told me to go to his house to treat him, because he did not want to drive all the way to the surgery to get an emergency treatment. According to him, I ‘should pay for his petrol’.
Tamir, now don’t get offended or anything, but I really, really dislike you. I mean, I don’t know you as a person at all, but as a troll, it is really your job to have people dislike you. At least people who don’t like dentists are getting something out of the deal. We, on the other hand, are just getting more ignorant listening to comments like yours.
No, it’s like a doctor complaining about you being sick, but refusing to let you help them. If you go to the doctor for a sore throat, but won’t open your mouth for the doctor to look, can he or she help you? Nope. Same if you go to the dentist and won’t open or squirm around. We have an easier time doing what we’re supposed to do when patients do what they’re supposed to do.
Overpaid? Ha! I have enormous debt from dental school and make LESS than my staff. Our overhead is insane compared to other professions. I am not only responsible for your mouth, I am also responsible for your LIFE. If you have a medical emergency in the office, it is on MY shoulders. We aren’t complaining about the work we do. We are laughing about the mentality of a percentage of the population we treat- probably someone like you
Do you like to get paid when you work? Do you like to be appreciated at your job? We do too…
Stupid Tamir, I feel sorry for anyone without a sense of humor. I attended a seminar about stress when I was teaching high school. We discussed the causes of stress and then they ranked the professions they studied. Teachers were #2, servers were #3, and dentists were #1. These are the only 3 professions I’ve had in my adult life. Lay off! We deserve to laugh!
I LIKE my dentist, he lives next door, is a nice neighbor, a nice guy, and very professional. I have almost ALWAYS liked going to the dentist. I know, I’m weird. It started as a kid because my Uncle Lou, who was a dentist, cleaned my teeth. I then went on to have a series of mostly good dentists over the years.
I did have one who filled an awful lot of fillings one year that I don’t think were really there, and who had a hard time keeping his hands where they belonged. Somehow, I think those two things were connected. My mother didn’t take us back to him.
I had one dentist who I liked who was murdered on the street outside his office in broad daylight, and I did feel that the dentist who took over his practice WAS trying to take my last dollar: his high tech office with every latest dental gadget and machine was being built into the lower level of his ostentatious, multilevel home which sported a partial glass floor so that fish from the outdoor pond could entertain guests and patients – one of the few interesting decorating ideas. It’s fine with me if my dentist is rich, but I’d just as soon not have my nose rubbed in the tackiness of it, especially since his office staff had to be pushed to file the insurance paperwork and insisted I prepay for a crown even though it was already approved. It didn’t help that the crown fell out after two years.
But aside from those two bad eggs, I’ve had good experiences. I like how my mouth feels when it’s all clean! And I appreciate people who have to spend their days picking around in the funky mouths of anyone who makes an appointment.
So thanks, cousin, for putting up with everyone, and good luck with your new life.
Wow, Nancy! Bummer to have those bad experiences, but glad you got away from that. Congrats on being able to see the good after some bad stuff. Thanks for visiting me here, and thanks SO MUCH for the support!
What about the patient whose breath could melt a birthday cake saying, “I know I need a deep cleaning, but can I get a regular cleaning?”. Hell naw!
Or ” the Dentist down the street charges this much for the same service. Why do you charge so much”. If you thought it was such a great deal, why didn’t you get the work done there??? If you needed a triple by-pass, would you spend months price shopping a cardiologist?
Or “the tooth doesn’t bother me, doc!” Despite the fact that teeth are in your mouth, they should still be considered body parts. If you have pain, caries, fractures, etc., in a tooth you have a broken body part. You are in a diseased state or “dis-ease”. If all of the above were on your forehead and you had to look @ it in the mirror everyday, would you do something about it then? Of course you would.
1) Patients with State “Medicaid” insurance. You should be kissing our feet for doing your work instead of having an entitled attitude. Since when does free insurance that provides you for the most part with FREE dental care entitle you to be a demanding, picky pain in the ass patient. If you wait an hour,, too bad.
2) Don’t complain when we stop taking HMO. How would you like a 75% pay cut at your job. HMO insurance is garbage, everyone knows it or should know it. Its obvious when its the “cheaper” option to select at work.
3) I never stay late or come early for bankers or government employees. They are more than happy to slam the door in your face as soon as their lazy office or department closes.
I deal quite well with the stuff I don’t like about being a dentist. I do love being a dentist, just airing a few things out.
It’s 1 am EST and your post has gone viral throughout my dental school (Temple). I’m a 4th year dental student and I’m glad you had the audacity to let it all out. I’m not even in the “real world” and I feel the same way… haha If you’re ever in Philly, I owe you a hi-5 and a drink bc these comments are more entertaining than my oral path notes. Hopefully zero no shows after this blog… ciao
So cool! I’ll take you up on that if I ever come out!
Really enjoyed reading the post and all the comments after that
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Every job sucks. That’s why it’s work.
That said, I’m surprised by the negativity. I’ve been going to the same office since I was a kid and the experience was always painless and cheerful. Great people, very positive upbeat hygienists. I have a hard time imagining a single patient who goes to my dentist doing a single one of these things. I think all the staff are having a really good time there.
For whatever reason, I’m lucky enough to have good teeth even though I don’t do much other than brush once a day. The hygienists are always raving about how I take such good care of my teeth. I literally spend less than a minute a day on them; don’t really get it. Never get cavities or other problems, no real plaque, always white and shiny.
The old dentist we had was an immigrant from South America who worked incredibly hard to get his degree against all odds and come to Canada to practice. Great man, and he took his entire staff to a different developing country every year to volunteer for several weeks. Unfortunately, he was taken by cancer several years ago.
The dentist who replaced him had big shoes to fill but is a very down-to-earth and kind man, and I’m never unhappy to go to the dentist even though I have a very hard time paying for it (very low income and no insurance – I don’t complain about it though, it’s a very specialized service).
I do have a bit of an issue with the huge profits they are raking in (it’s in a wealthy area – trust me, they are not hurting on student loans etc here) compared to, for example, my job as an audio designer where I have also spent 10+ years in intensive study and experience learning as much as I can about another highly specialized skill, but barely scraping by because it is in a field that currently has much less monetary value assigned to it than dentistry.
It’s not so much that they don’t deserve it – just that they seem to be among a privileged few who are earning what they truly deserve these days.
Like most people, I also strongly dislike the majority of the interactions I’m forced to have with ungrateful clients at work, even though I try to stay positive while there, so don’t think you’re alone in this. At least you’re being paid enough to potentially raise a family in return. Not everyone is.
Love your story. Thanks for sharing. There are many benefits to being a dentist and many love it, and it IS a great career in many ways. A lot of the negativity here is people letting off some steam. Unfortunately with this post as with everyone’s job, sometimes the negative overshadows the positive. Good luck with your career.
Whaaaaaaaa! Brad, grow up!
Lolabees, I feel exactly the same way about dentistry and your blog really spoke to me. Seriously, what can someone like me who is also sick of dentistry do to get out of dentistry and still pay off 350k in loans? Choosing this profession really screws you if it isn’t a good match for you, but not many other professions pay enough to cover this amount of debt. It is true that life is too short to be doing something that makes you unhappy, but I can’t come up with a good solution. Any suggestions?
Teresa, we get calls all the time from dentists asking for help because they are fed up with their patients. They say they take the joy out of their profession. You may want to consider surrounding yourself with a behaviorally gifted staff who can work with your patients in a different way, dedicate yourself to providing a full time facilitator (patient coordinator) who spends the necessary time getting to know why your patients voluntarily walked through your front door, and learning their story and how they hope you will make their life better. By offering what will make their life better in a way they can understand, it can make your life richer. The rest, let go.
I think you have to “do the work” to find a way out, and it certainly didn’t happen overnight for me. Until then you may try to follow Mary Beth’s advice. I was able to get some really good years out of dentistry until I decided it was just time to move on. I’m dedicating more posts to this topic, so stay tuned.
YES YES THIS IS SOOOO TRUE!!!! PATIENTS DON’T REALISE WHAT TWATS THEY CAN BE. As for the accusation that we are greedy – DO YOU FUCKERS REALISE WHAT IT TAKES TO PROVIDE YOUR TREATMENT? THE MATERIAL COSTS??? THE PRETTY GIRL HOLDING THE SUCTION (yeah I’m sure not many of them work for free you arseholes!!!)??? THE COSTS OF BUYING/LEASING THE CHAIR??? ALL THAT STATE OF THE ART SHIT YOU WANT US TO USE ON YOU??? THE TV IN THE WAITING ROOM??? THE LOCAL ANAESTHETIC – perhaps we could give you a 10% discount by not using it, just like low-cost airlines give you a 10% discount if you carry your own suitcase to the plane – AND ALL THE OTHER FANCY SHIT YOU IDIOTS INSIST UPON??? Dentists keep precious little of that, a bit of an insult considering our training and the time and effort (including physical, we cop quite a bit of back strain), and also considering that for the most part, your treatment would last for several years and improves your quality of life. Or were you hoping to have a pretty smile and be able to enjoy your steak for $30?
Before you lash out at your dental bill, maybe think about all the useless shit you spend your money on – like smartphones (oh you are so fucking important that you couldn’t afford not to check facebook 10 times an hour you fucking lowlife scum), pay TV, your fuel-guzzling car (oh a small fuel efficient Corolla is so beneath you your fucking majesty), season tickets for your loser sports team, that Contiki tour (yeah, getting pissed and having sex with people from your home country is totally the way to appreciate the cultural variance of Europe you bogan/chav/redneck scum!!!) – and tally that up. Might make your dental bill look reasonable hey!!!
I can’t wait till I retire and I can fuck all the ungrateful wankers you are off FOREVER!!!!
Wow Pauly!
lolabees did her rant in a very funny and professional way without the use of such strong language! Your rant makes me think of a 16 year old boy who is cursing behind his parents back and is very unprofessional. I can totally relate with everything you are saying, but I could have understood it much better without all the f-this and f-thats!
I agree. So many patients complain about how they can’t afford dental treatment and yet they buy such fancy things like iphones, ipads, designer clothes, etc. People need to get their priorities straight!
Almost anyone can afford what they truly want and almost no one wants everything they can afford. Patients get to decide how they allocate their money and what they choose. We can’t want it more than they do. We can only gain their trust and try to influence their thinking.
Very true Mary Beth! If there is a strong enough desire to get any product or service, people would make the effort to save up or allocate funds accordingly. It is ultimately their decision.
Ok I know this is an extremely late to the party reply but I’ve seen this sentiment more than once and I have to say you can’t always tell someone’s circumstances by what items they’re wearing or carrying around. If I were to come in to your office I would likely be wearing a 200$ coat… that I either bought years ago when I had a job, or got on an extreme discount. I would be carrying a new iPhone… that my friend bought me and pays for monthly. He gave that to me as a present and I couldn’t say, oh no please could you spend that on my dental work instead. It’s rude to tell someone how to gift you and I do legit need the phone. I would be wearing a two hundred dollar bag… that I got as a Christmas gift and will likely never replace. Just because I know people who have been generous enough to gift me some lovely things does not mean I have scads of money. I get a disability check and no dental coverage. I’m not saying that kind of person doesn’t exist because they definitely do but remember people like me exist too and often get penalized for the bad examples other people provide.
Hahaha! I feel for you. Crazy! Well said! Hahahaha… I know you feel better now.
Say it, Pauly! I like you. Where do you practice? I’d be your patient. I LOVE funny people and people that say it like it is .
Haha! The first time I read this I was shocked, and then having gone back I found it pretty funny myself! Whoa!
Ha!
This is getting printed and hung in the break room at our clinic
oh my god my miserable life is written in few words …. i thought that my life would be much complicated ….. god bless me
Lolabees. look at all the replies lady.. you must be sooooo proud
This post was hilarious…well written. The only thing you forgot to include is people trying to text while working in their mouth. I think it’s extremely rude….
You may like to know that this post is going viral amongst dentists who live a long way away from you on a totally different continent. We appreciate every word you wrote.
“NO OFFENSE” meant…
here 10 reasons are a open statement.
I have to make a comment about someone canceling an appointment. I am not speaking of chronic no-shows who just decide not to come, but people who sometimes cancel at the last minute or same day.
I have a problem with the medical field who make such a big deal about this, when, in all probability, you have run late yourself on numerous occasions. I have seen several dentists and MDs who run late on a regular basis. These are the same doctors who whine about patients who cancel and come late. Why is your time more valuable than mine? More than likely, many of your patients have taken off work to come to you. No matter what their job, taking off is costing them something…an hourly wage, vacation time, sick time. I, too, have spent thousands of dollars on a degree and deserve the same respect of my time that you do. Perhaps you are not one of those dentists that run late all the time, but please remember that just because you are a dentist does NOT mean your time is worth more than your patients’.
Your perspective is absolutely correct. Everyone’s time is valuable. In fact, running late is the number 1 stress factor among the dental profession. Nobody likes to run late and majority of dentists hate running late and try not to. Unfortunately, being a dentist is quite different from being a family physician. Family physicians spend majority of their time talking to patients and writing reports whereas dentists spend the majority of their time actually doing physical procedures. Whereas the physician can stop a conversation anytime, the reality is once a procedure is started by a dentist it has to be finished (for example, removing a badly broken down tooth) and it is sometimes difficult to guage the amount of time needed. So in response to your concern, I believe the majority of dentists don’t think their time is more valuable than the patients’, otherwise it wouldn’t be the number stress factor for them.
Thanks to all of you for saying this and saving me some typing
Agreed.
That’s a good point, Annie, which is why I always strive to stay on schedule. I seldom run late. Sometimes, a procedure may take a bit longer than anticipated, or I may have to work in an emergency (yesterday I saw a 2-year-old girl who had fallen and hit her front teeth), but I always apologize, and try to make things move along as quickly as possible while still providing good care.
I think most of us have a problem with the patient who is habitually late, which forces us behind schedule for the rest of the day. Those patients’ time is valuable, too, and a habitually late patient is disrespecting not just me, but also my staff and my other patients.
If you strive to stay on time, your patients will begin to show up on time. If you are always late, you teach your patients the bad behavior of being late. There are occasions where your schedule will be off and when you acknowledge it, apologize and explain how concerned you are for your patient’s time, they appreciate that. If the patient shows up late and it does not allow you to do the procedure in the remaining time, you have two choices – do it and run late or explain that you are unable to complete the procedure and will have to reschedule. Your patient will be annoyed and you will lose revenue for that day but it will be less likely to occur in the future.
Mary Beth,
Here’s where we’ll have to agree to disagree. From the time I have been here, I have consistently stayed on schedule, except of fairly rare times when running behind was unavoidable. There are still patients who seem to be unable to show up on time. In fact, some get angry if I mention that we need them to be on time for their appointments, as if I am the rude one. Some seem to run late as a sort of power play, as if making us wait makes them feel more important.
And I do reschedule, if I don’t have time to complete the procedure. And some of them will show up late the next time, too.
Our solution – we tell them their appointment is 15 or 30 minutes than it actually is. Passive-aggressive, maybe, but it seems to work.
*except for*
and their appointments are 15 or 30 minutes earlier. Posting between patients, losing my train of thought
I agree with you on that. There will always be exceptions – patients who are always late – to everything! Sounds like you have a workaround for that.
Keeping people waiting is my #1 stressor.
It really is quite amazing to me. This blog is consistent with what I typically hear at dental meetings and at the University where I am clinical faculty. Dentists continue to berate patients for incorrect use of terminology and a lack of understanding of the complexities of particular procedures. Instead, try LISTENING to what they are saying!! It really doesn’t matter that a patient says they have TMJ instead of TMD. They are trying to tell you, the best they can, that their jaw hurts. It just doesn’t have to be so difficult. I apologize to all patients who have been made to feel less than by my colleagues.
Thank you this was the very message I was addressing within my post and I certainly appricate a dentist who is willing to understand his or her paitence.
Thank you. You are right! It’s a shame there’s too much on the school curriculum that we can’t help new dentists to better learn this skill. There is a lot of good CE out there to help with this though.
Did you skip over the whole “greedy bastard” generalization? I have patients tell me daily that they have been diagnosed with “TMJ”. I listen and then proceed to educate them to the best of my knowledge as to how we can treat their issues. I personally do not know many dentists that would stop and say, “Wait asshole, it’s TMD!” However, if you come into my office and say,”Hey, Doc, I think you’re a greedy bastard, rot in hell and I have TMJ”, I may not be so receptive.
Wow. Some of the remarks and name calling to Suggestsmagic were surprising. I assume those replies/posts were from dentists? Real professionals? Condesending? Makes me think of the Southpark episode about SMUG. (SNIFFFF…) I’ve had mostly good experiences with dentists. But when someone says ‘I hate the dentist’… its usually “the experience” not the dentist, in my opinion. I don’t have a denta-phobia, but the sound of the tools and the scraping etc makes me cringe and its difficult to relax.I love the reclining chair and would gladly have one in my den to watch TV! And its the dentists that will not work with you on payments that give the others a bad name. All of my MDs work out payment arrangements, and take insurance, but my dentist does not. Cash or Credit…before you leave.
Are all of your MDs in private practice working solely for themselves? Most dentists will accept insurance and offer third-party finance arrangements. I would imagine that your cash/credit dentist has been burned by debting turds once too often.
I LOVE my dentist – he always tells me I brush very well and then he shows me pictures of his dogs (who model part-time and wear Burberry jackets). He is awesome.
One thing I think is an interesting point is the slight hypocrisy that you can sometimes get from health practitioners, though. Sometimes I think that affects the dentist/doctor-patient relationship. I’m a medical student, so I speak from some personal experience. I’ve met doctors who are really fat, doctors who are alcoholics, doctors who smoke, doctors who appear to have had excessive sun exposure etc…. equally, I’ve always been surprised at how so many dentists and orthodontists I’ve met seem to have bad teeth. It’s quite odd…
What bothers me as a dentist is that patients always feel they deserve some type of discount for knowing someone. Imagine checking out at the grocery store, and saying, “hey, could you take a little off. I know other people who shop here, too.” Dental offices have tremendous overhead and with the elective nature of truly profitable dental work, times are difficult now. Just because someone has a doctorate doesnt mean they wake up every morning to piles of cash at their door.
I am a dentist in Kansas and I LOVED reading this!!!!
Well, I tolerate trips to the dentist, thus think of them as a necessary evil. Then again, since I’ve had enough work, I like my dentist and his staff – even though I haven’t received my invite to the office holiday party – and after spending all that time with them this year.
Dentist here..love my job and most of my patients…its the handful that you talk about here that can be a challenge. Five per cent give you 95 per cent of your headaches.BTW saw this on Facebook…viral post indeed.
Right. That’s where the “degree of difficult” fee comes in. If you choose to work with them, and they require more time and effort, you are entitled to charge more.
Usually, yes. But dentist who are participating with PPO’s can’t increase their fees. Or they can, but will have to write off whatever the insurance company doesn’t pay, anyway.
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lolabees – I HAD to share this with my staff first thing this morning. We are all cracking up and how funny the TRUTH is!! Thanks for starting our day with some humor about our challenging and rewarding profession
I have only been practicing about 5 1/2 years but I can relate to all 10 of these for sure!! I have a small, patient focused practice and I really try hard to treat each patient as an individual and be understanding, respectful, caring and considerate while doing my best work. I love most of my patients – but there sure are some doozies out there that do all the things on this list and then some. Thanks again!!
A fellow dentist friend shared this with me and I HAVE to share it with all of you! Made me lol. Gotta have a sense of humor – but this list is so TRUE!
Former Dr. Lolabees,
I can say I knew you when! Great blog – hilarious but sadly true. I congratulate you in your new endeavor. It takes a lot of courage to make the change that you did. You are an inspiration. I hope you find happiness on your path. Keep in touch….B
p.s. – love the haircut!
you forgot: patients moving when having a moving drill in their mouth and patients opening 1 mm. how the F am i going to see your tooth if you open for one finger to get in?
Ironically, after posting this yesterday on FB, I got a call at 1am this morning from a tourist saying she had ” a bit” of a dental emergency. Really!?!?!?!? She obviously did not read # 4 on this list. Good Lord!!!!
Lolabees we may have been separated at birth….your beginning paragraph may have just been written by me too in my head. And I posted this on my FB site because it is SO TRUE.
I love this article!! I am currently a dental assistant and love working with my Dr. Plus I love going to the dentist. Why? because I have never had a cavity in my life, but have gotten 1,16,17,32 extracted. (all in one visit!) I to have a TMJ problem and it does not have anything to do with having your mouth opened to long, because as you can see I have no extended work in my mouth. (crowns, bridges and so on) My all time favorite complaint is my whole mouth hurts around the gums. Plus my gums bleed. And when the dr tells them it’s because you need a serious cleaning! They can’t believe it! When you look at your teeth in the mirror don’t you see the dirt? When your arm leg is infected doesn’t it hurt? Well same thing your going to feel pain. And other favorite is sorry, but I forgot to brush my teeth today? You mean to tell me in the am when you wake up you do not use the rest room to release? Like hellooooo do it then! No one is ever that busy!!!
This article was hilarious. As a dentist, I have experienced MANY of those same sentiments! haha Thanks for writing.
Thanks for writing this! After years of working in a dental office at the front desk, I have heard it all! You are right on every count!
also, don’t call us on Dec.20th and want to get in and use your benefits up for the year. Plan ahead and be polite when you are told the schedule is filled already.
Here are some reasons why your child’s pediatric dentist hates you (not your child):
1. Your child is 3 1/2, clinging to your leg screaming like a Howler monkey and oh yeah every tooth in their mouth needs a filling or cap. Why are you looking at me like I woke up this AM and decided I wanted to kill your child today by recommending sedation or the hospital? It must be MY fault – I apparently leave my magic wand at home too often.
2. No one told you to not put you baby to bed without a bottle full of apple juice? You’re an attorney. Really?
3. I don’t really care about your martial status. The sign in the waiting room and form YOU signed says whoever brings the child is financially responsible. It’s not MY problem your ex husband won’t pay his child’s bill so please don’t yell at my staff when they call looking for money that YOU owe me.
4. I’ve seen all four of your children since they were 12 months old. You know all about my family because of the years we’ve spent together. Your youngest child is completely manageable when you’re out of the room but reverts to a 2 year old when you’re in the room yet you insist that you must be in the room stroking their hands and constantly asking them if they’re all right? FYI you’re not helping them or me.
5. I assess kids all day long and I don’t charge for laughing gas so when I recommend your 4 year old child would benefit from it for the four quadrants of treatment they need why would you say no?
6. Do we really need to fix the big hole in my 4 year old’s baby molar? Isn’t it just a baby tooth? Sigh….this is your 5th child and your oldest is in college. Pretty sure we’ve had this conversation before but just in case I was just trying to fleece some money out of you lets have it again.
7. Last time you were in your four children had 18 cavities. We spoke at length about flossing and brushing and it’s importance. First thing I ask this appointment is how are the kids doing with flossing and brushing and you respond they’re not. You then look at me like I’m trying to rob you when I tell you they have more cavities. Really?
8. Telling me you are not brushing and flossing your 3 year old who already had 2 cavities because “they won’t let you” is not an excuse. Man up, be a parent and clean their teeth!
9. Parents should not = child’s best friend. Sometimes you have to tell them no. Sometimes you have to make them do things they don’t want to.
10. Informed consent does not = al a carte dentistry. Just because you don’t like any of the options doesn’t mean you can just make up your own options and expect us to follow your uneducated lead.
I see a very large percentage of pedo patients. Most of them I love. But I do always say the same thing…I love the patients, don’t like the parents. Every single one of these rings true. Well done!
I had a patient who was a 4 y.o. little girl who had her parents wrapped around her little finger. Dad is a physician and had to accompany her into the op, against my advise. He interrupted us several times to pamper his little girl saying, “Don’t worry; it won’t hurt!” while only doing an exam and pro. The child had rampant decay, so I explained the treatment plan to dad and child in layman’s terms. He refused a fluoride treatment and while clutching his child, he asked, “Why would you torture her just for a baby tooth she will eventually lose?” I couldn’t believe Dr. Dad’s ignorance and arrogance! He sure did his child a real disservice mentioning “hurt” and “torture” within 5 minutes of each other…and to top it off, showed that he didn’t trust me (or any dentist) by questioning me in front of her. Obviously, I referred out.
Great!
Love this post, great addendum. Pedo surely brings its own challenges, and yes, most of them are dealing with the parents!
OMG- I absolutely despise the parents that put their children to bed with a bottle full of juice or milk and then give you the response “Well it’s just a baby tooth!”. REALLY?!?! Do these people really think that just because it’s a baby tooth that it must not hurt the child to have a giant rotten hole in it?
So true!!! What cracks me up is when the parents say ” I told you not to eat all that candy, but you do not listen!” the poor kid is 6yrs old has cavities on every tooth. Who the hell buys the candy?! Who is the adult with the job to buy the candy?! This just pisses me off evey time there is one who comes in with the same reply. And boy do I let them have it. And I’m just the assistant.
11. When I’m your 5th opinion and all four docs before me said the same thing….chances are I’ll agree with them so hopefully you’ll go for a sixth opinion and I don’t have to deal with you. (Happened to me yesterday – red flags went up, mom gave me the creeps, and all I wanted was out of the room with her and little Johnny).
I’m not a pediatric dentist, but I can relate to every single point you listed!
I’m not a dentist, but I work in the medical field so my empathy goes to the dentist. What an accurate depiction of the attitudes and challenges we see as healthcare providers. And if you’re going to tell a dentist/doctor a “medical fact” about your diagnosis because you think they’re wrong, then don’t accuse them of berating you for correcting your inaccurate assessment. The internet and your friends are no substitute for the years of schooling and medical practice that preceded their diagnosis of your problem.
Great article. I too am a dentist an can totally relate to every bit of it.
Just curious about what you are doing now that you have left dentistry….I am constantly looking for a way out myself !!!
I love the dentist! Makes my teeth feel great. My father gave both my sister and I his genetic predisposition for lots of plaque. I brush my teeth and floss twice everyday and I do it very carefully and thoroughly, yet every time I go to the dentist the hygienist says, “You have a lot of plaque, you should make sure and floss and brush thoroughly.” When I tell them I do and I have a genetically plaque-y teeth, they give me the “Sure, whatever you say” look. Why is that? What is there that I need to do to convince these people?
oh please, are we really supposed to feel sorry for how much money dentists make. You are paid plenty because HMO’s didn’t screw you over like they did MD’s. Quit complaining. Md’s, mainly surgeons are the ones he aren’t paid enough.
I understand the anguish sometimes invovled in the job, but lets remember you get paid to do you job! If your patients do not wish to take care of there mouth let them continue to waste money, and you continue to do you job and get paid for it. Trust me I understand the need to talk about issues in the work place, but did it ever occur to anyone that by openly admitting the faults of your patience and the ignorance you incounter with them may perhaps create and issue that now patience are in fear that there dentists are constantly judging them? Wich I can not speak for everyone, but that is the fear I think most patience have and it is why they put off what could be done today, onto tomorrow or the next day so forth and so on; it is not right of course. Secondly noone seems to be addressing the patience and there personal lives and all the contributing factors that may be at work.. of course more often then not its laziness, but again if the patient wishes to procrastinate or be lazy let them waste there money. while I found humour within this blog some of the dentist responding I was rather in shock; if your post reflect at all how you work, I would be in fear of you as well. Some of your posts are very rude and are a reflection upon yourself. Those dentists and commenters that posted and actually took the time to be polite and explain your cause, that reflects on you as well; in a positive manner.
You make money doing what you do, dont take abuse from your patience by anymeans, but comments like,” I hate the dentist,” are not a personal stab upon you. I will be the first to admit I have said,” I hate going to the dentist,” and not out of disrespect to my dentist, but out of fear and awkwardness, he asked me why and I explained and he said he would hate the dentist to, had he gone through the expierence. Rather then take it personal if you have not asked them why, ask. It is no different then purchasing a house and you have to sign the documents what is something that is always said,” I am signing my life away,” everyone seems to reference that statement, its the same concept the I hate the dentist remarks are the same somewhere along the line that became the thing to say.
There is a big difference between “I hate going to the dentist” and “I hate the dentist”. I’ve heard both. Maybe it seems like just semantics to you, but it means something to the dentists who get to hear it. And no, I don’t generally take it personally, but I do think it’s rude.
And while, yes, we do profit from patients’ self-neglect, sometimes, the amount we get paid just isn’t adequate compensation. I’ve had patients bite my fingers multiple times during an exam or filling. How do you expect me to do good work when you’re closed down so much that you’re actually biting my size-four-ring fingers? I’ve had them grab my hands with the syringe or handpiece in their mouths. Eventually, no matter how much we get paid, we’re still going to be aggravated.
As to the posts being public, I think that’s a good thing. Lolabee wasn’t insulting, and some patients would really benefit from being told what they’re doing to hinder their own care. When I ask someone to open wider, they often roll their eyes like I’m being unreasonable demanding. Maybe seeing that every dentist on this forum feels the same would help them see the light.
“Your Wrong” and “Am I Right” and Presumably, “What What” should quit being a coward and use the same name. This is rude. Because English is your 3rd language, you may also not understand American humor. We are not upset; we love our jobs; we are just blowing off steam! YOU’RE wrong about our incomes, Mr. Know-it-all-just-a student. Many dentists own their own businesses and this comes with a lot more responsibility that just practicing medicine or dentistry. Yes, you can set you’re own hours, and practice the way you want to and don’t have to take orders from someone else. I have a individual patient-focused, evidence-based practice I can take pride in; however, I don’t go on vacations and don’t make much money because of my overhead. I pay my employees well to care about my patients as much as I do. I also take offense to your elitist view that physicians are on a higher ethical plane than dentists. We are all professionals held to a higher ethical standard than the general population. Perhaps it’s because you are a foreign student and the way you view women is culturally different, but you sound rather sexist about your fiance’s less important and less sacrificing job than you plan to attain. Are you aware that dentists have the most stressful profession in America? (…at least from one study presented to me at a stress workshop broadcast on national public radio.) Teachers are #2 and Servers are #3. Physicians are no where near the top 10. You need to give more credit to your fiance and to the practice of dentistry. You are a young self-righteous man who has a lot to learn. How dare you judge us!
I’ve never read this blog until today but I have to thank you for the 20 minutes of laughter at reading all the News Flashes contained in the comments. Loved your top 11 list and then loved the ignorant commenter (with horrible TMJ) who called every dentist a greedy bastard. If that doesn’t open up the floor for some comical discussion! I love my dentist!
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It’s probably a good idea for you to stop being a dentist.
Stop whining.
Since patients are people, and some people are asholes, it’s only science to expect to meet all kinds. Like diffusion.
Besides, you’re the patients custodian, in a sence, and that means you’re obliged to help them, how idiotic they may seem!
Stop whining.
The above is true if you see yourself as someone having a moral responsibility for the patient (as all physicians MUST agree to. Though, you’re not a physician).
If you dont (and you dont need to), you are free to treat whoever you want!
Since the patients actually pay you (contra physicians) what does it matter if the patient misstreat their teeth? Since you, as you claim, (wish is a lie*) dont care for the patients? (Eat candy – support your dentist)
*The only reason you’re irritated at them patients misstreating their dental hygiene, is because you actually care. Here by proving your whole article wrong.
Stop whining.
Well, my point all comes down to this: Being a dentist is not a bad job. You actually dont take much shit OVERALL, you get a lot of money, you do something that is meaningful for yourself (and patients, dont forget) and you can always say no to working crap hours as a physician, again, can not.
Ah, that felt good.
Yours sincerely
First off, go back to 6th grade english class.
Second, patients do not “actually pay you” – most have insurance, that pays jack shit for the care and supplies used to treat each and every patient.
“Being a dentist is not a bad job. you actually don’t take much shit OVERALL, you get a lot of money…”, etc, etc. ARE YOU A DENTIST???? DO YOU HAVE ANY PERSONAL KNOWLEDGE OF ANY OF THIS? OR ARE YOU JUST ANOTHER IDIOT???
The article was not whining. It was blowing off steam that practically ALL medical professionals would love to do, preferably in a patient’s face.
And “The above is true if you see yourself as someone having a moral responsibility for the patient (as all physicians MUST agree to. Though, you’re not a physician).” You’re an idiot. Dentists and dental hygienists must also abide and agree to the moral responsibilities laid out in our “code”. We are medical professionals, which you obviously are not.
My english isn’t good and I know that.
English is my third language and it feels bad to see that every comment is about my bad english rather than about the point I was trying to make (and I am sure most of you got it…).
For the record I have two years left on my education and then I am actually a medical professional, a physician. I also am engaged to and lives with a dentist. Before that I worked at a dentist clinic, assisting both dentists and maxillo-facial surgeons.
I dont know how it works were you live, but here dentists does make a lot of money and does have a smaller responsibility for the patients than a physician. (Something my girlfriend is actually glad for). Patients do pay (or the insurance company does, or the health care system). We have a good life and she has a good job and if you cant take patients I really think this kind of job doesn’t fit you. I cant see why it gets you all so upset when I point it out.
Did you understand that?
If you didn’t we can always try to write in danish, but I dont expect you to understand.
I dont expect you to know even a single word.
You, how ever, expect me to be able to write in perfect english just to be taken seriously.
I dont think that it is fair and it doesn’t exactly make me think you are respectful towards your patients either.
Btw, I am “your wrong” but I wont keep that name for obvious reasons.
I loved this comment, thank God I skipped all the way to the end. Hooray for the American public educational school system!
“Your” wrong: Don’t be mad that lolabees had you in mind when she wrote this. She’s just trying to help you out.
You spelled “your” wrong. Should be “you’re wrong”. So I guess YOU are wrong.
You’re welcome.
I’m a dentist, and I don’t see this as whining. Actually, these are stating actual facts, that keep repeating over and over by some patients. It’s the patients who keep whining over and over and over. They actually abuse their dentists by constant complains, and the reason is, dentist get alot of money etc….. It looks like you didn’t get it yet. It takes years and efforts to be successful, and any profit made is to pay off student loans and high price practice expenses . Our job is meaningful more when patients know to appreciate.
You don’t understand the profession at all. Neither Physicians nor dentists have a moral or legal obligation to treat any patient that walks through the door. They are custodians of the patients treatment and health, but are not held captive by patients refusal to follow through. If the patient refuses to do their part then the dentist has every right to, and should refuse to provide treatment. Dentists are Doctors by the way. This article was about the lack of common decency and respect patients sometimes show their dentists. The rest of your comments are gibberish due to an utter disrespect for the rules of grammar and a failure to portray complete thoughts.
^ mwah mwah mwah!!!! perfectly stated!
That’s really funny! “eat candy – support your dentist.” =))) Being a dentist is rewarding when we have appreciative patients and patients who prioritize their teeth…. More Than any other new gadgets or designer stuffs or other vices they have. But I don’t think you get to read about things here talking about the profits and expenses. You should for your better understanding, your wrong! =)))
Your Wrong – I would love for you to come to work with me for a day! I work at a busy dental hospital in a ‘rough’ town and it would really open your eye to what this lady was originally poking fun at!
I do take a lot of shit actually, and with some patients its like swimming against the tide which can be increds frustrating when all you want to do is help them and yet when you point out that they may want to consider toothbrushing for a change, they look at you like you’ve just shat on them! And NHS dentists get paid F all, so its safe to say im not in it for that reason!!!
For you ladies out there, one major cause of TMD is oral sex. So instead of blaming your dentist, blame your significant other.
I feel like this everyday.
dear patients out there. one thing more, b4 visiting ur dentist wear a nice perfume, ve bath coz at tymes u stink like anything and dont stare at them during treatment. thankyou
Nahh I don’t want them to wear any perfume. Brushing their teeth (preferably floss too) and having a shower is enough. Love it when the occasional few wash their hair too.
Dear YourWrong. You are, actually, wrong (grammatically, that is). Let me correct you: It should be You’re Wrong. And if you have never been in the dentist’s seat, then you really have no objective way of understanding her opinion. She is not whining in her post, she is expressing her opinion (as you just have above).
I have sat in the dentist’s seat…as a dentist. And I can relate to many of her comments. I’d like to chime in on her post further and mention that one thing the physicians have over the dentists is that many patients accept that a medical visit (immunizations, surgery, etc…) will involve pain. They accept it and deal with it. Many patients, however, seem to think that a dental visit must be painless. That is, in part, due to inaccurate expectations brought on by a small subset of dentists who promise things beyond reason. But most dentists (I’m sure there are a few freaks, though) do not like hurting others and are really there to help solve issues. She mentions this in her post, but I just wanted to elaborate on the disparity of expectations between medicine and dentistry.
Thanks for the post Lola!
Wow~ you go girl!!! Umm I mean Dr…
Hehe You just voiced the thoughts of sooo many dentists out there!!! 
I just graduated from dental school and have been going through major conflicts over the thoughts of career change… I have been debating over it sooo much!! A good percentage of my friends who just started working already complain about how much they hate their jobs and it seriously got me to think.. But I’m soo scared to make this change with over $350k+ in student loans, the shame it would bring on my family (being asian doesn’t help hehe), etc…. :’( and its not like I suck at dentistry or my patients hate me either (a few of them even said they would move to the Seattle with me when I graduated and I was going to school in Philly) It’s just that I don’t feel passionate about dentistry.. I don’t stay up all night thinking about teeth as some of my classmates do.. When I’m doing something I’m passionate about like fashion designing or creating something, I can stay up all night and not even feel tired or even hungry!!! :3 When I tell people that dentistry is my back-up plan they laugh! But I don’t regret going to dental school either~ Even though it was the hardest four years of my life (by that I mean it almost actually cost my life.. Maybe more on that later…) I wouldn’t trade it for the experiences, changes, DRAMA (maybe a little less of that hahaa), growth I’ve gained from it… (wow it would seriously make some great reality tv!!! Want to produce it with me?!?! Hehehe) But it also made me very jaded with people and some parts of life… Le Sigh.. But if I didn’t go it would’ve always been on the back of my head and somehow I still would’ve probably ended up in dental school later only to realize the same things much, much later hahah… dilemmas, dilemmas…. Sorry for going on and on… 
Your blog has inspired me sooo much though!!! So if you see dr.fashion designer on project runway next season that’s me!!! 
PS this is going viral amoung my dental friends on facebook!!! Yay!!!
Among** sorry for all the grammatical errors… Argh can’t spell or write today!!!
Hey, what about those “momzillas” who self-educated and “degreed” themselves via googling, and tried to tell the dentists how to treat their children?
By the way, most fees (PPOs) are determined by the insurance companies, so it’s not like the dentist just “make a lot of money” by charging just whatever. It’s your insurance who takes your money, and may or may not reimburse us for our labor.
Thirdly, I’ve seen some patients looking for chances to sue (one blatantly wrote to us suggesting to settle out of court before she sued. We didn’t, and she didn’t sue). These people surely help driving the cost of doing business up.
This seems like a lashing out post and most of the dentists I know are kind people that are really trying to give their patients a good experience. If the world looked more at the positive and not the negative both sides would be resolved. My husband is a dentist and he loves it. He loves seeing the same families and watching them grow up. It is a stressful job, but what job isn’t. He worries about the patients the don’t take his advice because he knows what is coming. He spends more on quality stuff than most so he knows he is giving quality care. I know you see the bill and he doesn’t expect you to pay for his education. He choose to do this he knew the sacrifice but trully wanted to help others. I know that sounds so clique but he left a job at a big corporate dental company to start his own practice so he could do the kind of work he could be proud of. Money is tight but we make it. There is a lot of overhead and stress but he can’t see himself doing anything else. The good and bad will come with every job but putting someone down because they said tmj instead of tmd seems like we need a manners lesson too.
I’m not a dentist, but as a new optometrist I can definitely sympathize with you about the majority of this. My favorite is definitely when patients comment about the price of an exam and reference them paying for my car/ house whatever when they’re definitely living a more expensive life than me and I haven’t bought a new car in 5 years because I’m chipping away on $300,000+ debt.
Thanks for making me laugh with your post, and good luck with your new career.
Haha! Hilarious.
I have a really great dentist. The only thing I hate about visiting him is that he is super cute and I have to sit there with my mouth open, drooling all over myself while he looks at my cavities. It’s embarrassing.
Thank you for the post. Very Very true. Not to forget, the rude patients talking on their phones or looking at their texts as soon as you turn or stop for a minute despite of a sign that says not to use your cell phone in operatory. Besides, regarding the first patient comment, if you feel your filling is high, you have to go back to your dentist within the first week, not wait weeks and months and then complain of TMJ pain.
There was a practice in Australia that had a sign in their reception area stating: “Please turn off your mobile phone while in the operatory. It interferes with our sterilization equipment”.
I can’t even imagine saying/doing these things about/to my dentist. I’ve been with the same dentist and dental hygienist my whole life (since I had baby teeth) and I love them! Sadly I have to switch because I moved and now they’re just far away. Life happens. But if I could take them with me I’d be totally okay with that!
This was too funny!
Amen.
WOW .. I just had a really good chuckle at “Your wrong”…. “The only reason you’re irritated at them patients misstreating their dental hygiene, is because you actually care.” I’m sorry but “at them patients”?! Really??
Clearly you are not IN the dental field or you wouldn’t have said any of the above.
I think this article is PERFECT! I have been in the field for 15 years and this couldn’t be more dead on!!!!! LOVE IT!
This top 10 was awesome. I read it from my friend’s FB status, which he cut n pasted. But i can totally relate and i read it at the end of a long day filled with 8 of the top 11. It was definitely amusing to read and blew off steam at the end of the day. I’m curious tho, you’re no longer practicing? Career change? Where can i read about it? Better yet, how can I do the same?
thanks!
Tell me your secrets too! It seems like a common feeling us dentists experience. I’ve been out 10 years too and feel exactly the same as you!
I also love it when I have the syringe in my hand and they say, “is this gonna hurt?” I want to come back and say, “No. It isn’t going to hurt me at all. You… on the other hand, may feel a little pinch. I always try my best to be gentle. But if you flinch and move, I will hurt. And I won’t be happy. At least you had some topical on your cheek. My thumb has nothing.”
I thought this was great. It is amazing how many people accuse us of ripping them off when all we are trying to do is help them. I drive a 10 year old car with 150k miles on it that I bought used 3 years ago and I still have patients accusing me of trying to pay my car payment with their mouths. Ironically they say it and when they leave I see them get in their late model foreign car.
30-35% is a ridiculous quote. I have been reimbursed as low as 16% (by greedy companies that want to take advantage of dentists) and as high as 25% (but I had to pay my own lab bills), that’s it. And yes, my debt is ridiculous: $780,000. If you want to blame someone for the high cost of dental treatment, blame the cost of dental schools and blame the ridiculous reimbursements from insurance companies. Also, blame the ridiculous patient that comes in and wants to spend 2 hours talking about a simple filling. Your insurance company doesn’t pay me to waste 2 hrs talking to you, they only pay me to do a simple filling.
AMEN!!!!!!!
I’m more interested in the career change. How long did you practice? What did you do with your debt? I’d like to do the same put have too many responsibilities/commitments. The stress gives me really bad TMJ
Great article. All my life I was afraid to go to the dentist. Later I moved to another country, Sweden and enjoyed as I never did before.
Great blog! =))))) Congratulations lolabees! Mwah Mwah Mwah
FYI …. Im not fond of reading! It make me feel sleepy. But this thing made me stay up so late for hours… And didn’t stop till I get to read all the comments. I had good laugh!!! Thanks to all the funny dentist and patients
Xylina, I didn’t “mooch” off my parents for my education. I paid my own way through school and even sent money home to help support the family while I was in school…I value an education enough to make those sacrifices.
Also, don’t be mean to the person with sharp instruments or the person who can write you a prescription for pain meds.
I am a dental student now and starting to see real patients in the clinic. Luckily, I have not encountered many patients myself that I want to “hate” just yet. But this definately gave me a good laugh!! It is quite amusing to hear what all the dental patients out there actually hate us for, and knowing 95% of their issues are self-inflicted due to their years of poor (or lack of) personal oral hygiene! If they don’t like to come see us because we “give them a shot” or “make their teeth hurt when we fill a cavity”, then take care of them in the first place! We work our tails off (and drain our bank accounts) to learn the skills we need to offer a very valuable service, and deserve a little bit of respect for it! WHERE’S THE LOVE PEOPLE?!
Thanks for this post! Although I have been blessed with amazing patients thus far, I know exactly where to go to put a smile on my face when (God forbid) I finally meet one of these patients I inevitably will “hate too”
SuggestMagic:
people aren’t upset b/c of the grammar or spelling mistakes or even your lack of knowledge, but b/c of your attitude: you (wrongly) assume that dentists are greedy, you call all of them bastards, and then you NEVER apologize. If I called all people of a certain skin color a bad name, that would be unacceptable, but you think it is okay to call all dentists “greedy bastards?!” It just goes to show that you are unappreciative of the work that dentists do to help you keep your teeth. My advice to you: brush and floss, watch what you eat and drink, perform dentistry on yourself, and the next time you want to shoot off your mouth, stop and think “could I possibly be wrong about this?”
Also, next time you have to pay a “large” dental bill, consider this: dentistry is actually really difficult to do. Dentists work
1. upside down (notice how they position themselves over your head), under water (spit everywhere),
2. in the dark (yes, your mouth is very dark and sometimes we cannot get enough light in there), in reverse (we look through a mirror to see things),
3. in a small contained area (yes, even you do not have a mouth that is that big),
4. on a moving target (people move even when they are trying not to move),
5. on a target that MAY be whining,
6. with very sharp instruments (which causes us worry), and
7. in very precise terms (we worry about 1/2 millimeters).
The only reason dentistry LOOKS so easy to perform is that your dentist is actually very well educated, trained and even has some natural talent which makes it LOOK easy. Don’t you think talented people deserve to be reimbursed well? I mean, I want a well-educated and talented person performing surgery on me and I am willing to pay well for that service; I wouldn’t want an uneducated person performing a surgery on me no matter how little they charged me.
Amen!
Agree!
Lighten up people! Everyone has a client once in a while that is a pain in the ass in every profession. We all vent once in a while, whether it is to your best friend or your dog. So don’t take the rant personally. I have had great dentists and horrifying dentists. But I know there are things that I personally could have done or said to make things go more smoothly. Don’t take everything so personal either. Everyone has different conditions/concerns and disorders it doesn’t mean we need to berate each other. Just laugh it off and laugh at yourself once in a while. You will be much happier that way. And just ask for some extra nitrous oxide and turn up your head phones!
lolabees, if you were my dentist, I wouldn’t hate the dentist at all! You are smokin’ hot! In fact, I might be chipping a few teeth just to get an appt! lol
No really, you’re actually very cute. Wish you were in NY!
Have a great holiday season!
For all us bastards that are not greedy……. I take umbrage. : )
Thanks, Charlie– that’s very sweet. Finally someone made a sensible comment on here
Thanks for keeping it light, as it was meant to be. A very happy Holidays to you!
Ok, so maybe the two days a year that I spend at the dentist are not my absolute favorite days. But this is in no way because of my dentist. I have had a couple great dentists and wonderful dental hygienists. I don’t understand why adults think it is permissible to act like two-year-olds just because they don’t enjoy their time in the dentist chair. To date I have had my two front teeth knocked out, a trauma related cyst then developed resulting in a root canal followed by another crown to replace the one damaged by the root canal. Did this cost me A LOT of money? Yes. Where would I be without the care the dentists provided? Well to start with I would have no front teeth which would mean that I would have a hell of a time eating, and I would never want to smile. Yep, pretty happy with the money I spent there. Dentists invested a lot of time and money becoming dentists and they do a job that I wouldn’t do for any amount of money. Mostly because of people like those described above.
Thanks for your support, Amie.
Another one to add to the list….. It feels too numb I can’t swallow properly. Well what would you rather I injected you with. Water?
#5 – I have a small mouth. If you’ll ask me nicely to open it wider, I will, but often I don’t know unless you tell me. Also, if someone is making noise inside my mouth that sounds like they’re removing enamel, I’m going to wince whether it hurts or not. Put on your grown-up pants & deal with it – it’s a natural human reaction.
I actually like my dentist, but for most appointments I see him for less than 5 minutes. Maybe your hygenist should be making most of these complaints? Some are valid but some seem as if you’re reaching to get a full 10 gripes in.
Do you like being a dentist? You chose a profession that requires lots of expensive education & working in people’s mouths. This does not make you superior to other people & I’m sick to death of doctors & lawyers acting like multiple degrees = greater intelligence, or that we should feel sorry for them or treat them like royalty because of what they chose to do. All jobs have their downside. You’re lucky you’re free to complain in a public forum. Many of us can’t for fear we’ll be fired.
Okay, I just read the first paragraph and realized you’re no longer practicing dentistry, so apparently you didn’t like it. My bad. I skipped right to the top ten list without reading the intro. I’ll patiently await the name-calling and bashing from all the perfect people here who needed to post yet agin that “TMJ is not a condition” after it had been said over 100 times.
no she left the profession hence the rant. trust, if she was still a dentist and she wrote this, she’d be utterly fucked!!!! well thats how it would work in the uk anyway.
seems like most people in america only see the hygienist (which is obvs a good sign!) but in england we mostly do all our own hyg stuff. interesting perspective
Very true, Sally – I have good teeth and I take care of them, so maybe that’s partly why I don’t see the actual dentist very often. It’s nearly always the hygienist doing 99% of the work on me, and I know they probably make less money than I do to stick their hands in people’s mouths all day long. And I’ll also admit I’m having a crappy day at work myself, so I may have been a little bit of an ass in my initial post.
I’m glad for people if they’re able to escape a job they hate, especially if they do have to work with the public and their attitude is going to impact other people. But I also think that if you’re in a job you hate and have other choices, that you probably should think twice before you bitch about it.
In this case, I just think, you know – hopefully you knew dentistry was going to involve being in people’s mouths and working all day with patients who aren’t real happy to be in the dentist chair, because let’s face it, most people don’t like to go to the dentist. That’s just the way it is. If you want to be around happy people all day long, the medical profession in almost any capacity probably isn’t a real good career move.
I don’t think it excuses people being abusive, but some of this rant seems a bit petty considering that some of it is simply part of being a dentist. It’s kind of like a policeman complaining about having to deal with criminals all day long – it comes with the territory. If I thought for a minute my dentist had this kind of attitude, I’d leave him in a nano-second.
Frankly, Annie, every dentist I know, including me, feels this way about some (not all, or even most) patients. Chances are, yours does, too, and just doesn’t say so.
Lolabee just put it out there.
We understand that most people don’t like to go to the dentist. I don’t like to go to the gynecologist, either, but I don’t tell him I hate him, I show up on time, I shower before my appointment, I don’t complain the whole time I’m there, and I don’t complain about the bill on the way out. I don’t like it when my mechanic tells me I need to do some expensive maintenance on my car, but I appreciate him telling me before it gets more expensive.
I don’t think we’re asking that much. Respect, and a team attitude from our patients regarding their own oral health. Sure, police officers expect criminals to be a pain. But we aren’t talking about criminals here; we’re talking about people who should have the civility and maturity to get through a dental appointment that is for their own good without insulting the dentist.
Dr. Drake – as I said, I don’t think people should be abusive to the dentist. And of course patients are hopefully not criminals – you missed my point on the analogy, which is, don’t gripe about something you knew was going to be a core part of your line of work when you chose to go into that field.
I can sympathize on some of the points made, but she started to lose me on #5 & on the one about x-rays. Those are things I don’t think many patients intentionally do. Due to my small mouth, I’ve had a few times when the x-ray film slipped because it barely fits in my mouth & we had to start over. If I thought my dentist felt hostile toward me for that, I would find another dentist. But then again my dentist has never actually taken my x-rays. It was always the hygenist, so he probably doesn’t feel hostile but she might. LOL.
But where she really lost me was the comment about how much she paid for her education. Sorry, no sympathy there. That was completely a life choice & it sounds kind of arrogant.
I have to say, I was appalled at the overwhelming number of dentists who chimed in with literally hundreds of posts to beat a 19-year-old into the ground (did anyone notice the blog that sparked this blog was also written by someone whom I think was 21?). Sure, she called the profession collective “bastards,” but her point was a little bit proven by all the highly-”educated” dentists who responded to her not knowing the difference between TMJ & TMD, by calling her an “idiot,” among some less-kind and vulgar terms (I believe one called her a “twat.”).
Really? And the dentists are how old? I’ve lost a lot of respect for the dental profession today. If I ever have to find a new one, I surely hope I don’t end up in any of the chairs of most of the dentists who responded to this blog.
Annie,
. I am a dentist, and yes, I put my full name here, but just because the site asked for my name to log in.
It’s just Sandy
I know most of my patients aren’t intentionally making faces or closing down, but after about the 20th time of saying “Wider, please”, with them opening wider for about 2 seconds and then biting my fingers again, it does get just a bit annoying.
And with the x-ray thing, Lolabees said she understands some people just can’t. I have a small mouth, too, and yes, the films hurt, but I suck it up. Just the way I suck it up when I get my flu shot or my blood drawn. Some patients won’t put up with a minor discomfort well enough for us to make an accurate diagnosis. For those who truly CAN’T, I sympathize.
And she wasn’t complaining about the cost of student loans, merely stating that they are a factor in the cost of the services we provide. They’re a factor in the cost of the services every professional provides, whether they are in business for themselves, or employed by someone else. If people don’t want the cost of education passed on to them, they should visit unlicensed, probably poorly educated health care providers working out of someone’s basement. If they want care from licensed, regulated, highly trained professionals, they will have to pay costs commensurate with that. Yes, it’s a lifestyle choice that we make, but if nobody made that choice, who would provide care?
I understood your analogy about criminals, I just don’t agree with it. For one, I think it is perfectly allowable for police officers to complain; everyone needs to vent, especially in a high-stress job. But also, the police officers aren’t generally trying to help the criminals, so that is a more adversarial relationship. We’re trying to help our patients, but are still being placed into an adversarial relationship with some by way of their own behavior. And, to be honest, I worked in the dental field several years before I decided on dental school, and patients were more stoic then, so, no, I didn’t expect such a large number of them would work against me in their own care. I don’t think most of us were aware before that, unless our parents were dentists, and mine weren’t. In fact, I chose dentistry over medicine in part because dental patients seemed more reasonable and appreciative than medical patients. Not so, anymore.
I agree with you about the posts in response to suggestsmagic, which is why I didn’t address the TMJ/TMD thing at all, but focused on her lack of understanding for why we sometimes have to do things a certain way, and her insult to our profession as a whole.
The thing is, every dentist I know, both personally and through online fora, feels this way about some of their patients. We all have the occasional patient who makes us want to just stay home. And we say so among ourselves. And it’s not just us – our staff generally feel the same way about the same patients, because their job is also made more difficult by patients who won’t cooperate and who complain a lot. We’re all just trying to keep people healthy, and some mutual respect is in order.
Strange. From my own experience of treating patients, most patients do NOT wince even when they can hear the drilling in their mouths (which is why when one winces I immediately assume there is pain). I know it is normal for patients to be anxious in the dental chair, but I was quite surprised to read ‘I’m going to wince whether it hurts or not’.
Thanks for posting this! I’ve been a dentist for 16 years, in both a large group practice and in my own private practice. I can certainly relate, and so can my staff! Its amazing to me how many of my patients think I’m so rich, that they should receive a discount, or not have to pay their insurance co-pays. This when I drive a 13 year old car with 160K miles on it, and haven’t taken a real vacation in 5 years. As for insurance companies, they keep saying the price of healthcare is going up, and yet they are actually cutting the fees they pay to me…Delta, Blue Cross and Medicaid all cut their reimbursement…so I’d like to know what costs are going up? Its not my fees.
My brother is my dentist. I love him. I still pay him, let him make fun of me while his fingers are in my mouth (so I can’t reply… it’s ok though, I bite him from time to time
) and I always brush my teeth before I go see him! He went to school for a long long time and I admire him for making it through! He’s an awesome dentist.
Also… I grind my teeth!
How can this topic get so many replies? Is this a dentist forum/site? Btw, good choice with WordPress. Kick ass CMS. If you ever need customization for it let me know. I will trade dental services for a custom Web design
On a more serious note, I think that every industry could list 10 reasons why they hate their customers. It isn’t just related to dentists.
Cheers!!
Lolabees,
You Rock. A friend of mine and I run a FB group called Dysfunctional Dental Stories. One of our members shared your blog in our group, which led others to share on the main FB wall and now I see that you’re going viral on FB. We, my friend Mary Beth and I would LOVE to have you join our group if you are on FB. It is full of really cool people from the dental community who love to share crazy stories about our daily adventures in our practices. I think you’d fit right in! I LOVE this blog and your others too, I’ve read a few. Keep blogging! Love Nomi Waters
It’s horrible for me. I have a hair trigger gag reflex and x-rays in particular are sheer torture.
But that’s not my dentist’s fault. He’s a good guy.
Patients like you can be very tricky but at least we understand that it’s not your fault. You’re not just tricking your own mind into being overly anxious and difficult.
Wonderful, wonderful post! To add: everyone feels inclined to make really dumb jokes and comments about dentists and dentistry. The best ones are just lame. (No, your sugar-rich dessert would not make me recoil in horror. I do have a personality outside of dentistry, and I love dessert.) The worst ones are passive-aggressive. (If I’m venting about a rough day that I just had, I’m not inclined to hear about how dentists are evil because your root canal hurt like hell.)
Anyhow, I wish you all the best in your future endeavors!
Seriously, hundreds of thousands of dollars in school loans. I love Basterds. Can we spell it basturds too? Excellent post. Thumbs up and amen!
This is SPOT ON. I wish those bastyrds can read this.
Healthcare profession is a “Noble profession” after all…We work more than what we get paid for, we understand that people make mistakes and keep our counter-transference in check! But it is also the most satisfying and rewarding job after all!
Love it!!!
Sincerely,
Your mouth janitor
Love the Post! I am a dentist and SO want to post this in my office! However, patients would feel it totally offensive so I will keep it to myself. I did repost it on my facebook…….so funny!
How did u put on FB? I’m trying from my phone. Not sure if it will let me?
Love it!!
I Love this.. So true!!! LOL
Lolabees: You really are not helping your profession with this sort of public outcry. Everyone reading this was at some point a patient, and very likely to be again in their lifetime. And the next time they go in to see a dentist, they will think of nothing but this post and resent their dentist even more. Imagine too if someone were to identify you, and your own patients saw what you had written about them! If someone in the medicine talked about patients this way…man. Frankly, you should have known what you were going into before you attended dental school. It is a lifelong commitment to others, and no one ever said it would be glorious or even that you would be appreciated for what you do. Good riddance.
People in the medical profession have written stuff like this. Look at a Reader’s Digest sometime. There is a monthly article about “50 Things Your ____ Won’t Tell You,” and doctors and nurses have been the ones in the blank at times.
And some patients really need to know what they do that is a hindrance to their own care. If that knowledge comes from a blog, so be it.
And it’s obvious from her former patients’ posts that Lolabees career change is not “good riddance” to them. It seems she was well-liked, which means she treated her patients well.
I have been a hygienist for 30 years and have always tried my very best to treat my patients as well, if not better than, I would treat my own family. I have been told countless times by patients who sat in my chair for the first time that they hate it here, they’d rather go through childbirth, they’d rather be anyplace else doing anything else rather than be in my chair. Once I have finished up with their appointment, they almost always thank me and ask if its ok to schedule with me for next time. I have quite a following at my office.
I know exactly how the dentist feels when he cited each and every reason why he hates “Those” patients. I agree totally with all 10 reasons. I have seen it all. My all-time favorite patients are the moms with toddlers who bring their “little darlings” in with them for us to babysit during their appointments. Come on, get a sitter already!!! Would you bring your cranky child with you to any other hour long important meeting, or appointment? Have you ever tried to work on a live human being with a colicky baby screaming the whole time 2 feet away? I’m trying to take good care of you and your 3 year old keeps asking, “Are you done yet, Mommy?”
If patients would just take a second and use a small fraction of the brain that God gave them they would not behave that way. For some reason dentists and dental offices are like a cosmetic store. “Just do what I want so I look better, as long as my insurance pays 100% for it. NO, I don’t want that if it’s not covered. Why should I have to pay?” They don’t speak to their Medical Doctor like that. They don’t decline to do what the Medical Doctor recommends. “Mrs, Jones, you have and infection in your kidneys we need to do this test and you have to take this prescription.”" “Yes, Dr. Smith.” But at the dental office its: “Mrs. Jones you have a broken tooth, we have to fix it with a crown.” :Will my insurance cover it? Not 100%?! Well it’s not hurting that badly so I’ll think about it.” Three month later Mrs. Jones is back with a toothache and now needs a root canal in ADDITION to the crown.” Oh, but dentisits are “greedy basterds”. I forgot!
Thank you, I just needed to vent.
Love this blog Lolabee. I am a fairly new dentist – D’10, and I work at a community health center. I experience most of the items on your top 10 every day. My addition to your list would be that I hate when patients who are meeting me for the first time start off the conversation by complaining about their previous dentist, or blaming their previous dentist for all of their dental problems. That patient has instantly put themselves on my “Oh geez, this is going to be a difficult patient” radar. I assume that they are also going to complain about me when they leave, and that most of the other items in your top 10 list will apply to them – they don’t take responsibility for the state of their own mouths, and have no appreciation for the work that we do.
I gather from the kind way that you’re responded to a few of the patients who have written, that you are a great dentist. And now that you are moving on, the profession will be losing an asset.
Amanda, almost every patient is a recycled one looking for a place that will provide what they haven’t gotten in the past. If you listen closely, they will tell you how they wish to be treated. It’s how you respond that will make all the difference. If what they are asking for is reasonable, responding with something as simple as “Mrs. Jones, I’m sorry you had that experience. You can be sure that we will do everything we can to make sure that doesn’t happen here” can set you off on the right track. Assumptions can often be your worst enemy.
Your thoughts on this are so funny and you give us all a great reminder of how to behave at the dentist! Love your blog!!! Keep it up!!!
For the lady blaming dentists for causing her “TMJ”: you should blame God, and be very upset, because he didn’t really give you one TMJ, but two.
I am a TMD (temporomandibular DYSFUNCTION) specialist, with a 3 year Masters degree and residency on the topic. I will be brief and just say that unless your dentist punched you on your face it is HIGHLY unlikely he caused your condition. He may have exacerbated or flared the pain in a joint that previously already had a predisposition to the disease. If it wasn’t the mouth opening during the dental procedure, it could had been a yawn, or eating a sandwich, or laughing out loud…
When a dental procedure needs to be done, it needs to be done, right? And your mouth would need to be open, right? With IV sedation or without the mouth needs to be open, and no, to do a root canal or a large filing you CAN’T close your mouth every 5, 10 or even 15 minutes, it is simply not possible, because the procedure requires a dry field. I agree that SOME may not have the patience/care/attention to give a patient a little brake during the procedure, which may cause exacerbation/flare of TMJ pain issues, but MOST TIMES we have NO OTHER OPTION. There are side effects for every single medical/dental procedure out there, you have to assess the cost-benefit ratio and make a decision – an example: should I treat an infection on my tooth in the expense of having a flare of pain in my TMJ???? Well, you have to make this decision, and accept the consequences no matter the choice. Simple like that.
It is easy to blame others for what causes you pain. Difficult it’s to accept that you have a chronic, intermittent condition that requires continuous attention and care.
There are crazy dentists out there, as there are physicians, lawyers, engineers, etc… But they are the EXCEPTION, not the RULE. Stop the generalizations, please.
Have a good night.
Great post!
Thank You.
Reason # 12 your dentist hates you:
You are frustrated, angry, in pain, uncomfortable, and don’t have the knowledge to understand exactly why you feel this way nor are you ready to hear what it will take to make you feel better, but you have made up your mind that your condition is not your fault. You place the blame on me or the last dentist you saw and accuse us of being interested more in our fee than you. The best part is that no one cares about my feelings or frustrations in trying to help you. It’s my job to eat a big ol’ piece of crow listen attentively to your rant and try to get you to let me help you. Even better is I know I will get to enjoy this same experience with another patient this week.
I understand the dentists who prefer to do mission trips out of the country do so again and again because the people there need them and every person is glad to have whatever care the dentist is willing to give.
That said; I always tell people I get to go to work I don’t have to go to work and I can’t imagine wanting to be anything other than a dentist. lolabees, sorry it didn’t work out for you but good on you getting out and being happy.
Next patient please!
My husband hates the dentist, I love him! I love having a beautiful smile, etc.So as soon as our son was born, I really made brushing of the gums and talking about our teeth so much fun, etc. His pediatric dentist is beautiful so my son loves going. I decided to start making my husband go with my son and guess what, my husband is suddenly really taking a little more ownership in his teeth so when he takes my son to the dentist she now compliments him on his teeth. My plan worked and my son’s pediatric dentist was in on it! My son is 7 and has braces and is doing great. It’s all how you introduce things in your house and I appreciate my dentist and his staff, they are always up beat and cheerful. I have never sat down and thought I hate my dentist and I hope they’ve never sat down and thought I hate my patient. Usually he looks at my teeth and says “damn I’m good”
ok…question why are dental assistants so under paid?? I feel that we help the practice run more efficiently and contribute to patient care just as much as the rest of the staff. Maybe it is the area that I am in but I am over it! I have decided to go for dental hygiene, I love being an assistant but I can’t afford it anymore!!
I agree that dental assistants are highly important and contribute a great deal to a practice. I’ve told mine that if she ever talks about the “R” word (retirement), I’m chaining her to a chair in the basement at night to keep her here. But until then, I pay her very well. I don’t know what I’d do without her – she’s always looking for ways we can schedule more efficiently, she knows all our patients, their quirks, their families, jobs, pets, pasts,… She’s great at explaining to patients what we’ll be doing, in layman’s terms if I have to step out of the room for a moment. I seldom have to ask for an instrument – she’s ahead of me. And she’s great with making things fun for a nervous child.
I do think it is appropriate to pay a hygienist more than an assistant, due to their more extensive education and greater ability to produce income for the practice.
Good luck in hygiene school!
So loving this blog post… I’m in dental school, and everyday, I wonder why I’m dealing with my patients moans and groans with their EXTREMELY discounted work that I have spent the night before studying, and probably hours in a lab fabricating (or some other lab that I’ve paid to have it fabricated). Oh, and I find it humorous when someone comes to me, and actually is surprised to have a good experience.
NEWS FLASH: Dentists are here to do good. If you find one that is ripping you off and you feel like isn’t treating you well, you have free will–switch dentists. But the majority of us just want to help you get out of pain and fix that “snaggle” tooth that we stare at while you talk.
too funny!!… how about reason #13 why your dentist hates you:… you show up in a cadillac escalade, with a brand new iPhone and the latest Designer purse. You have several broken teeth (since you claim you “don’t clench/grind my teeth” and ignored my splint recommendation) and now need a few crowns… then you have the audacity to ask me for a discount (!)… because you have six kids (your choice) that you put in expensive private schools (again, your choice) and you ‘really don’t have a lot of money’ !!!!! Guess what? I know your address and you live in the most expensive area of town….seriously?!
good luck with your next endeavor, keep your license current, because, you never know, you may miss all of these wonderful situations we experience in dentistry
I am not a dentist, but I visit mine every six months. There are two dentists in the practice where I go and they are amazing! I couldn’t ask for better dentists! I love the whole staff…such great people.
Very professional, caring, understanding, SUPER with my girls and always willing to give advice when I ask (and sometimes when I don’t). LOL I show them respect, because they deserve it. I have never had an unpleasant visit. You are still young, hopefully you will mature into just accepting the little bit of discomfort that sometimes comes from a dental visit. Although, it shouldn’t be too uncomfortable…unless you’re having some work done and then, well….have you ever heard the saying “it hurts to be beautiful”? Thank them for taking the time to do their job well. 
Find a good dentist and show him or her respect, because they know more about your teeth than you do. 
Boy lady, you really hated you job right? Forget dentistry, work instead in a complaints department! Your bitchy attitude will come in handy!!
I saw nothing bitchy in Lolabees post – she just stated the facts we all come across, with a bit of humor.
How was she bitchy?
I had more than one patient who are more than 20min late for their 30min appointment. When I explained to them that I could not see them or I’d have to make the other patients wait (unfairly), they got mad at me. Would it be wrong for me to feel upset that they got angry at me for the consequence of their own mistake? Should I have upset the other patients who came on time by treating these tardy ones and making the punctual ones wait?
Another patient broke 4 dentures made by 4 different dentists, and she believed it was all because the 4 previous dentists were bad. Was it wrong of me to decide to not make the 5th denture for her? If she broke one, I’d think ‘perhaps it was the dentist’. Two, ‘maybe she was unlucky’. More than two, ‘no, it was her own fault.’
So so true!!!!
What did I learn from reading this blog and its comments? There are a lot of angry and disgruntled folk out there in need of a release. There are always factors to consider when it comes to people’s actions (but yes, some people do suck). I did get quite a few laughs out of reading some of the comments posted. At the end of the day we should remember its just water under the bridge and there are other more important things to worry about than whether or not someone appreciates us being in their mouth (that sounded unintentionally dirty).
Wow, what an interesting way to finish a tough day at the dental office by reading all of the comments. I guess after 35 years of being a dentist (missing only two sick days and one of those was to bury my son), never having a paid day off or a paid vacation…I feel I have helped my community be healthier. Some patients are scared, some are just mean jerks, but they all want healthy teeth and that is what I was trained to provide. Every profession has its down side. Dentistry can provide fulfillment because people come to us with acute needs and we have the ability to make them smile again.
I have to agree with Amanda Davids. I am also a dental hygienist and all of the top 10 apply, but I would also have to add “the moms with toddlers who bring their “little darlings” in with them for us to babysit during their appointments” to the list. It is very frustrating and difficult to do our job while your child is whining and playing with the light, instruments, suction, etc. I have even had a child lay his head down on my leg and drool all over me, then proceed to put his mouth on anything he could within reach. If you’re kids cannot behave, please leave them home.
I’m a greedy dentist I guess. So when a patient tells me they just made my car payment I tell them “lord no, that was paid off long ago”.
Sad as it is, this top ten resonates with dentists because we have heard everything on the list, all too frequently.
One of the worst parts about being a dentist is having a patient in one room that accepts what is going on, handles the small twinge from the carefully placed injection (and dentists know all too well what this feels like, as we have all had every injection known to man, performed by people with zero experience). I then get to go into the next room and the patient acts like I’m injecting molten hot lava in their face. I especially love the patients that start their pain response prior to me actually inserting the needle.
I do love helping these people though, and I put up with more than I probably should. This Saturday we will be doing a free dental care day in our office. Just trying to help some if the less fortunate out the best way we can. We will probably see about 60 people and two of those people will make me contimplate never doing it again, but I know in the end I will cause this greedy bastard actual must care deep down in my small heart.
Full disclosure – I’m an orofacial pain specialist, which is a dentist who specializes in treating headaches, muscle pain, nerve pain, sleep apnea and TMJ issues. Here are my Top 10 comments to this engaging post. Enjoy.
1. Any dental treatment at any fee is 100% custom for every single procedure.
2. Don’t complain about the fees unless you were not advised prior to treatment what the cost of the procedure was. You accepted the treatment and the fee, and obtained a good service for your money.
3. Pay your bill at the time of service. Dentists aren’t banks and there is no other business that will let you walk out the door without paying for the product/service. I guarantee you Best Buy, Wal-Mart, Target, Home Depot, etc. did not let you walk out their doors without paying for your stuff.
4. Most dental offices have an overhead between 60% and 75%. Yes, good dental treatment is expensive but some patients think the fees are 100% profit.
5. If you neglected your teeth, or went to the dentist in pain, don’t blame the dentist, and accept responsibility for your pre-existing condition.
6. What is wrong if a dentist runs a successful practice and makes a good living?
8. Lower your dental expenses by taking better care of your teeth. The more you do, the less we will need to do. Floss and brush at least twice a day, and get your teeth cleaned as often as recommended by your dentist. That is the best insurance you can invest in. It’s your choice.
9. Dentists should give patients a break every few minutes for longer procedures. If a patient is open for too long without a break, it can exacerbate a displaced disc or a closed lock, which are technical terms for what the public refers to as TMJ. Yes, the condition was likely pre-existing but dentists should not make a patient worse, which is when they end up in my office.
10. Almost all TMJ pain can, and should, be treated without touching your teeth. I treat TMJ pain without adjusting any teeth since most issues are related to the muscles and/or the joint itself, and have nothing to do with the teeth. Most TMJ can be treated very conservatively with stretching, nighttime splints, and anti-inflammatory medications. True.
I love you point about paying at the time of service. Funny how patients can’t afford their crown or endo treatment but have no problem at all paying for their brand new 60″ 3D top of the line television!
One of my favorites is the patient with the $3,000 designer purse and the matching designer shoes who complains about dental fees. Priorities, people, priorities.
Great thoughts Orofacial Pain Specialist. If dentists could learn to find gracious ways to express these sentiments, they could have more productive and respectful relationships with their patients. Thanks.
Thumbs up! Nice read. My friends shared this post in Facebook. I agree on 1 – 11.
I love Reason 8! That so irks me
I work for a dentist that has been practicing for 28 years. I want to say I love the article!! I am an assistant, but that is secondary to my resposibility as office comedian. I feel like the Dr. I work for would love to print the 10 reasons….and spend alot of time coming up with funny comebacks to the rude announcement that “I hate the Dentist” people spew out without thinking:
#1. 99% of people dread coming to the dentist, please come up with an original comment before he gets in here, thanks
#2. Can u imagine what it would feel like if he walked in and said he hated you? Dentists have a high suicide rate, i need job security, so how about you wait to decide if you hate him until after you actually meet…..
#3. I am sure once you have been to our office, you will hate many things, but it wont be our dentist.
#4. Does your hate come from anxiety? Do you want the giant inflatable baby bottle, or the big stuffed chicken to hold on to? It is a visual aid to let him know you arent comfortable……so you dont have to say you hate him
I could keep going, most people are shocked and quickly realize they are being Rude!! Most people will actually choose the chicken, and i say dont be a chicken, they dont have any teeth!!! I work hard to remove all negativity before he is in the room, and our patients know from that point on that we are truly trying to make them comfortable, and improve their dental health. If you are not comfortable where you are, keep looking….we say it all the time, there are 40 other dentists in this town, surely you can find one if you do not like us……life is too short to even make a rebuttal to the person that was hateful about dentists in her comment…….I bet she has had a bad experience in one office, and has used that to judge us all. She might end up like my stuffed chicken……toothless!
Just an FYI, it is a myth that dentists have high suicide rates. But it doesn’t hurt to be nice to a dentist.
Yes, we had the highest suicide rate for over 30 years, but we have been surpassed by psychiatrists just this year.
I am a dental assistant and I absolutely love this post!! When people automatically say they “hate the dentist” I always let them know they are far from the last person to say those words and ask why. They never have a legitimate reason… usually something sissy like “I hate the sound of the drill”.
YES!!! Finally someone who gets it! When patients make comments like this, don’t assume you know what it’s about. Ask them. Behind the comment lies a whole host of different reasons – some of which the patient wasn’t even aware of until you took the time to ask. Replacing your judgment with curiosity allows you to truly find out what is holding your patients back and starts the process of behavior change through discovery. Now, the answer IS legitimate. For instance, the “sissy” drill thing – if the sound is an issue for them, it’s an issue. Stay in the question – what is it about the sound that bothers them? Are there things we can do to make that less of a problem for them? – you get the idea…keep being curious!!! Bravo.
just explain the consequences and the treatment part , allow the patients to decide what they what.
if we force them for their betterment they will think we are doing this for our sake(our betterment).
so let them go through the consequences(tooth acne is horrible no one willl dare to bare it.) they will understand the need and importance of the treatment.they will cooperate. MAKE THEM FEEL THE NEED,
DO NOT FORCE THE treatment allow them their way .
by doing this both of us can earn respect for each other..
” dentist are greedy basterds that want to work out you as fast as possible not letting you close your jaw for a moment. ”
dentists are in servise industry .it is for ur sake u go to them dear patients so kindly respect them ‘
u have no choice dear patients u have to respect or suffer pain , NO dentist will allow u speak against any dentist in the manner u have done above.
wow, i think its fairly clear to assume that dentists out there definitely know what TMJ stands for. and its apparently very funny.
and by the looks of the subsequent discussion, im assuming they teach best by repetition, because that’s what keeps coming up.
Lolabees,
Great tongue in cheek vent, (excuse the pun). Your 10 Reasons response was very clever and right on the mark. Thank you also for providing the opportunity for so many people to rant. I almost forgot how anal retentive our profession can be. I will forward to all my dental buds as my daughter, also a dentist, did to me.
Guess I should learn how to perform my own dental work, these professionals appear cynical……hateful towards their careers and reimbursements and clients…. shock and awe… to say the least.
Care without judgement…
YES! Learn your own dental work it may take you becoming one of us to understand these frustrations. Enough said.
Just learn to brush and floss. Then, you won’t need our services as frequently and even then probably just basic ones (cleaning and periodic x-rays).Perhaps then you will have plenty of time to pull that stick out that jammed up your butt and get a sense of humor!!
I have been treated by quite a few dentist and
I have to say I never had a dentist I didn’t like
Even the dental surgeons who extracted all of
My wisdom teeth (in 1 day I might add) where
great. Haha the pain after sucked but I never
Laid blame on them. I love going to visit the
dentist and if my insurance would allow it I would
go monthly. I absolutely love that fresh feeling when
I leave their office. My new dentist is a riot. He uses
to much novacain but hey after the first time
I just asked not to be so numb. As for the noise
While sitting in the dental chair my DA just said
Bring in your iPod and listen to your music..
Lol once I told my dentist to put his mask on and
He replied “I read your chart, I know you don’t have
anything”. I said listen doc but I don’t know what
you have … He Laughed it off while pulling up his
mask.. I still remember the look on my surgeons
face when after getting the 4 extractions I
just wanted Motrin… lol I can understand fear my
Sister has only 8 teeth left in her mouth due to
a dependency on prescription medication and
Her lack of going to the dentist because of fear.
We visited the same dentists as children so no I don’t believe
A dentist was to blame.. Some people a just that
way.. Anyway I don’t think of dentists as greedy bastards
I think they have come a long way in the dentistry
feild.
An interesting read, I do have to say I enjoyed it. Something some people don’t seem to understand is that your dentist is trying to do their job. It’s nothing personal, they are trying to pay their bills and feed their family (should they have one). When I go to the dentist, I try to help my dentist make the process as easy, quick, and painless as possible. First and foremost I make the time to brush beforehand, it’s just gross if you don’t, at least chew some gum and try to make your breath not wreak to high hell. Second, I open wide as possible, this falls under easy and quick. Third, I realize as a reasonable and hopefully intelligent person that there is some pain involved. All I can say is shut up, deal with it, and be an adult about it. Get it done and you be ok after a day or two.
Wow, what a bunch of uncouth dentists! A young girl in pain vents and so many of you lash out at her, and how! Sounds like an ocean of frustrated and unhappy dentists and patients. Maybe it is time to do your own root canal. Very disheartening! I didn;t hate them before but now I wonder if I have started to hate dentists!
Great post. Spot on.
Can you guys stop pointing out that TMJ is apart of the human anatomy. I think she saw people make the post a hundred times before you decided too.
Thanks for making my day Lolabees. After reading this, I can also say, “…….ahhhhh, I feel so much better now.” My favorite is Number 5 and 6.
Kudos to you for penning our thoughts in a very humorous and witty manner! Humor is the essence of life… It can change even a dreary moment into something tolerable,if not downright beautiful! And I simply love the way you are taking the time to reply to each comment personally,even the nasty ones!! And that too so pleasantly!! Good luck on your future endeavors!!
Great! Thanks for this post…at least now patients know how we (dentist) really feel. All the comments here are good benefiting both the dentist and patients. Patients should know that not all of the dentists are alike…if you feel your dentist is a gold digger go find another, ask friends or relatives for referrals. And for the dentist who are doing bad things to their patients, you are losing so much in your practice…you will lose your credibility as a professional and eventually lose patients. God bless you lolabees! please do more post in the future!
“Additionally, I have spent hours literally bending over backwards repairing your teeth.”
Really? How does that work exactly?
This is so funny. I can relate being an ER nurse we see many people with rotten mouths showing up in the middle of the night demanding pain meds, tooth extraction, etc. like this just happened. All I have to say about #2 is thank goodness you weren’t an OB-GYN. It could always be worse
Gee I’m so sorry some of you chose a profession that is so bad. boo f’ing hoo. Suck it up you are well compensated and don’t get me the crap about your education bills we all have them. Maybe if we weren’t meant to feel like we committed some unspeakable crime for having an issue in an area only seen through an x-ray because the previous hack placed the crown so close to the tooth next to it that every time you floss in that area it breaks. Yeah, that was my fault… My son’s pediatric dentist has the same smug attitude I hated as a kid; a bitchy hygienest who is pissed because my son isn’t a seasoned vet in the torture chair yet and a dentist who comes in as the closer like a 9th inning relief pitcher to tell me my boy needs a little bit of work. cha ching. So, yeah I don’t hate you I just hate going to see you! I am made to feel like crap and get to pay you handsomely for the effort.
I hope you don’t refer to the dental chair as a “torture chair” in your son’s hearing. If so, you may be contributing a lot to your own problems. Even if you don’t specifically say things like that, if you have a bad attitude toward dental appointments, that attitude will communicate itself to your son.
And if you don’t like your son’s dentist, switch.
a drawing pictures a dentist and his friend. friend: “what will you be after you stop being a dentist?”. dentist: “happy”.
I have this drawing in my office
And weirdly enough, a lot of educated people felt the need to act in an immature way (ie two wrongs make a right?) by insulting someone they perceived in insulting them. Further, it seems that either we have a bunch of narcissists here or people just didn’t read the other comments, because I could swear I read the same f***ing comment by most people responding,,,
Was all this necessary? Did it improve dentist/patient relations?
To be fair, the initial post wasn’t kind to people either.
For my part, I’ve been on both sides of the situation. I have worked in offices and know how hard the employees work and that they believe they are doing good things for people, not figuring out ways to steal their money for unnecessary procedures.
I have also been on really hard time for years where I could not afford a dentist. To me, a dentist is a bit of a luxury. To my insurer, my dentistry is a bit of a luxury, too. lol As a result, I am not able to schedule dental work as I would like to have it. Not only that, but I have a family. Sometimes their dentistry needs supersede my own. We do not have an unlimited supply of credit or money. We have to pick and choose. Sometimes, it also means we have to pick and choose even getting a cleaning done in a timely manner. I actually had one dentist suggest I take out a small home equity loan to pay for dental work he thought I needed. I was thinking “Really??????? Compromise the stability of my living place to pay for dental work?” I said, “No, thank you. I am uncomfortable taking out a loan for this.” Assuming I qualified and that a bank would give me a loan for ‘dental work’. So, that ‘nasty mouth’ you might be working on might not have had too many alternatives. Even basic brushing and flossing doesn’t get rid of all plaque. If it did, people wouldn’t need cleanings.
My frustration with many dentists around here is that they contribute to their own bad perception. When I check out of the dentist, I ask for payments and am told, ‘no way’, and not in a nice fashion. The average person cannot afford to just write checks for $3000 or $5000 and that makes them reluctant to make an appointment and keep up with their own care. Dental insurance is mostly crap, which is not good – considering much research now indicates problems like heart disease are exacerbated by inflammation. I think dental insurance is way out of date and doesn’t compensate for procedures on a level that it should. It would be nice for dentists to take some time out of their busy schedules to lobby for improvement on that for their patients’ benefit, or failing that stop refusing insurance because they don’t want to ‘deal with the headache’ of trying to collect. My job is to provide insurance, to pay what they don’t pay, keep my end of the bargain with brushing and flossing, and make my appointments. My job is NOT to make your existence as easy as humanly possible. You make a good living, can afford to hire someone to chase down that insurance, so please do just that. Oh and flexible monthly payments on the balance would also be nice. There’s no need for me to pay you $5000 today. Even the hospital will accept payment arrangements. (PS This is not an isolated case. In my town of 120,000 people with two hospitals and a teaching hospital, I found exactly TWO dentists who will take flex payments and I am seeing one of them…)
Their staff is often gossipy and unprofessional, too. When I am in the chair, I don’t want to hear about your fight with your girlfriend, boyfriend, mother, sister, husband, priest, etc. I don’t want to know where you think you might want to go for lunch. I don’t want to overhear your cell phone conversation, or bickering with other employees. Those things detract from my ability to relax and focus on the situation at hand. I am already laying down in a fairly strange place, often in pain or discomfort, with bright lights and bad music all around me, being told I’m going to need $5000 work of root canals and crowns. The rest is insult to injury.
Anyway, I hope that my comment has been more constructive. I wish that a dialogue had been opened here instead of a dogpile on someone, but that’s just the Internets, or so I hear.
You make some good observations, and I hope you will see my responses as explanations not attacks.
On the topic of payments. When you buy a car, the dealership does not finance the car for you they provide a financing option through a bank. A dentist does not have the financial resources to take on the risk of lending and act like a bank. We run a very high overhead business, and when we accept payments (most of us will on occasion for highly necessary treatment for patient who are truly limited financially – but not for convenience) we put ourselves at huge financial risk because of our costs. We frequently have people chose to finance $5000 worth of work, others choose to have the tooth extracted and buy a deck for their house. The dentist is giving you options, and you have the right to chose to spend the money on something else based on your priorities. The dentists obligation is to tell you what he sees in your mouth and what can be done about it. Don’t be upset with him because he lacks the crystal ball necessary to know you priorities
You said, “I think dental insurance is way out of date and doesn’t compensate for procedures on a level that it should. It would be nice for dentists to take some time out of their busy schedules to lobby for improvement on that for their patients’ benefit, or failing that stop refusing insurance because they don’t want to ‘deal with the headache’ of trying to collect.” Dental insurance is out of date, but as dentists we have very little control over what your insurance pays, so if we are going to lobby for your benefit that sometimes means not letting them control our fees. Maybe the reason you think all dentistry is crap is because you keep going to dentists who try to treat your dental problems with such low compensation they cannot possibly do a good job. We sometimes get proposals from insurance companies where the reimbursement for a crown is 20% less then my actual costs. to afford it I would have to spend half the time doing the work, send the crown to China to be made, and hire staff that lacks the professionalism to know when it is appropriate to talk about their drinking escapades.
I hope you can take my comments in the constructive manner they were meant.
We offer a dental insurance alternative in our office called quality dental plan. You can find an office near you or recommend an office at http://www.qualitydentalplan.com
We are doing our best to help our community. I hope you can find the resources to assist you with you and your family’s dental needs.
Unfortunately the vast vast majority of dentists don’t take in house payment plans because they have tried it, and most of their patients don’t pay them. Not some, MOST. Can’t help people when you are bankrupt.
I feel for your condition. I understand what is happening, and I see it all too often. good luck to you.
Yeah I find this at animal hospitals too, because people won’t pay. It sucks for me because I would feel immensely guilty if I didn’t keep up with a payment plan, but for every one of me there’s ten jerks not paying and they ruin it for everyone.
As the payment plan issue has already been addressed by other posters, I will address the insurance issue. Filing your insurance is done as a COURTESY, it is not required. Some dentists in my area don’t file at all, just give the patient their bill and let them do the work of filing themselves. And yes, I don’t accept insurance who insult my staff, demand from me refunds of money they didn’t pay in the first place or threaten to sue me if I don’t pay, or consistently “lose” claims for which I have electronic evidence of claims submission. Some insurance companies are abusive and dishonest, and I will not work with those companies.
And, if we have a large enough practice to require us to hire another person just to deal with insurance companies, well, who do you think that cost gets passed on to? That’s right – the patient. Filing insurance generates NO income for the practice, but it does cost the practice money. That money has to be recooped somehow.
As far as staff conversations – let your dentist know you’d prefer quiet. Many of us keep up a stream of chatter as a way of putting the patient at ease. If it bothers you, say so. But I wouldn’t characterize all that conversation as gossip – most of us are friendly with our staff, see each other socially, and are involved in each other’s lives. Sometimes, just as with any other coworkers who are also friends, we chat about our personal lives. But we don’t gossip about someone else’s personal life in a malicious way, which is what I consider gossip to be. At least, not in my office.
Just wondering why this country doesn’t have better dental insurance plans? We have pretty good medical insurance coverage, why is there not good dental insurance? Your teeth can become a medical emergency if not taken care of, so I don’t understand the reasoning behind this. Even with the militaries insurance for dental, I still end up paying a good chunk of cost, and never pay anything for medical. The dentist and oral surgeon informed me that they would really recommend that I get my wisdom teeth out, because they would cause problems in the future. However, it still cost me $600 to get them out. I paid this amount, but what about the individuals that are below the poverty line, that make less than $1000 a month (they can’t afford to shell out $600?) If something is really necessary, then why isn’t it covered by medical? They did tell me it was an elective surgery, but if the wisdom teeth are going to cause me problems, preventative care is important. If we spend more time doing preventative care, then there would be less people having issues later.
That’s a good question Natalie. I hope all the dentists and their financial coordinators respond to you. My perspective is that as employee benefits, dental coverage is considered an “add on” – sort of like an extra bonus over and above medical coverage. Employers negotiate with their insurance providers for the best deal they can get – which ends up being nothing more than a couple of cleanings/exam and a small amount toward treatment per year. Truth is, people don’t die from “bad dental health” and treatment isn’t “necessary” in most cases and that drives how the industry treats dental care. Bottom line is if you value your teeth, want to look good, want to chew and enjoy your food, want to avoid pain and/or want peace of mind, you will have to pay for it yourself – just like car repairs, a new dishwasher, a perm or other things you could live without but prefer to have.
I would love to know exactly what kind of degree you hold Mary Beth Head? Your assertion that ” Truth is, people don’t die from “bad dental health” and treatment isn’t “necessary” in most cases and that drives how the industry treats dental care.” is one of the beliefs that causes so many patients to not understand how their dental health DOES affect their entire body. Dental Insurance company’s get by with treating oral health like a second class citizen because for so long this myth has persisted. I surely hope with the advancements in science and in dentistry that myth is replaced soon with a more educated understanding and that the insurance company’s will finally start to devise plans more in line with what our medical communities have. $1000 – $1500 per year maximum payouts in dentistry is peanut compared with the thousands of dollars your medical insurance company pays for your healthcare.
Melanie, Forgive me. You’ll get no argument from me on anything in your response. I certainly don’t want to perpetuate the perception that oral health is not connected to overall health. My point was that most dental insurance companies justify their benefits on the fact that in many dental situations there is no systemic relationship – sad but true.
No problem Mary Beth
I just did not want to have someone read misinformation and set back the little bit of advancements we have made in this area.
I think we both agree that it is the insurance companies that need to change their look at dental health so that patients will also start to see how very important their dental health affects their overall health.
Melanie…and unfortunately Brad’s got it right. the insurance companies hold all the lobbying power. Just look at what’s happening in the state of Washington and you will see how damaging dental “insurance” is becoming. That will increase over time and dentists better get ready and hold on for the ride. The little power dentists hold is the ability to influence their patients to think differently about the role dental insurance plays in their care. It’s like pushing boulders uphill but it’s the most powerful leverage you have.
The simple answer that you probably don’t want to hear is that. Dental care is an expensive quality of life treatment and nobody starves without teeth. True, life threatening dental infections do occur, but are relatively rare, and when they do occur they can be treated in the hospital under medical coverage. Most dental disease is largely preventable with good home care and diet, so it is a good thing for people to have a financial stake in taking care of their teeth. If you stay on top of it and do the preventative things you will rarely have a huge financial obligation.
Like others have said dental “insurance” is an add on and it is only as good as the plan chosen by the employer. Furthermore, it really isn’t insurance at all in the sense that it doesn’t insure you against a catastrophic loss, rather it gives you a benefit to use.
As far as lobbying goes, the insurance companies have all the lobbying power. The Ada is no small group but the insurance companies really don’t have to listen to us, as we don’t buy insurance from them. The only people they will listen to is the employers. On a final note, insurance companies have an unfair exemption to the Sherman anti trust act that allows them to work in tandem against all of us, vs competing against each other like every other business in America. If you want change, lobby against the anti trust exemption–dentists already spend fortunes doing just that.
Natalie,
please be aware insurance companies are in business to make money. They do not provide care. The less treatment they cover and/or more hassles they create, the less money they have to pay out, this equates to the more money they make. The people who lose in this insurance model are the patients and the dental office. Also, please be aware dental insurance and medical insurance are to completely different business models. I mentioned in an earlier post we started to offer an insurance alternative called quality dental plan that gives people without insurance a benefit to visit our office. It still costs money but it is much less than insurance and unlike insurance you can save on all of the dental care at our office. Insurance companies make it extremely difficult to provide quality work at low reimbursements. Patching a hole in a boat with a piece of gum only last so long! Prevention is the best dentistry as it is the best medicine.
Natalie,
You may be surprised to hear that many patients actually lose money by having dental insurance. We are sometimes asked by our patients to analyze whether having insurance is “worth it” for a patient or family, when the patient’s insurance premiums are paid in part by deduction from their payroll. In some cases, patients were paying $1200 per year in premiums, but only using about $250 to $300 per year in benefits, because their oral hygiene was so good. Unlike a severe medical problem, house fire, or car wreck, severe dental problems are seldom unpredictable, and seldom costly enough to lead to bankruptcy. So, we’re not usually insuring against a catastrophic loss here. And unlike those other types of insurances, dental insurance has a very low maximum benefit – usually around $1500. So, people were paying $1200 in premiums to receive a maximum benefit of $1500, of which we could fairly predictably say they were unlikely to use more than $300. Those patients were losing a lot of money over the years – and insurance companies were profiting handsomely. Once they saw the numbers, many chose to drop their insurance and pay out of pocket.
So true!!
Talk to me about overfilling…
Before you ridicule a patient for using the term TMJ instead of TMD, consider how often you tell a patient that they need a “root canal” when we really mean endodontic therapy.
Oh, so very true! Haha
As a third year dental student I have already encountered everything you said. Hilarious but also sad. People just don’t understand the difficulties of fixing their teeth, especially when they don’t care enough to maintain them themselves.
To all the people that are wasting their time blogging, bitching and being passively aggresive on this page. Why don’t you spend your time more valuably…spend it flossing your teeth once a day.
All the studies show that it is better for you mouth and your body.
YOU SAID EXACTLY WHAT I WANT TO SAY!!!! GOD BLESS YOU
I just want to say I love my Dentist! He and his entire staff are the most wonderful people. I had really bad teeth for a long time and when I went to him he came up with a great plan of action to help me. I can now smile and show my teeth with pride. He not only helped my teeth he helped my self esteem. Thank you all the dentists here for all you do for us
true
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Awesome, everything you said is so true.
AWW MAN!!!!! SO VERY TRUE AND I WILL LEAVE IT AT THAT
imagine that we have to deal with all of these 10 problems in egypt while the crown fees cannot pay for a good shirt. looooooooooooooool
Interesting article. Obviously that provider was a little UN-happy with there career choice and made the best possible choice for them. Leave the profession before they hurt someone or better yet get sued. In any career choice you make you must love it not like it. It will show clearly in your work. Money comes and money goes, but if you are good at what you do and love what you do financial reward comes often. I applaud the writer to decide to leave the profession. To many of stay us stay in a profession that they completely dislike and do damaging and create scaring affects in people lives. If you are true to yourself re-evaluate your career choice. It’s never too late to start over. I am a DENTIST and TOTALLY LOVE WHAT I DO….. I can’t think of no other profession I want to be in………
Thank you so much for your comment! I agree with you 100% I loved (almost) all of my patients and always gave them my very best because I care about people and believe in doing what is right. Your patients are very lucky to have you, and I am so happy to hear there are so many dentists who love what they do!
Omg I used to think this every single day I worked on patients! Its so true! another thing I would add is… Every time I went to party or met some relatives, they would tell their little kids that if they didn’t behave, I’d give them an injection! I love little toddlers and it is so depressing when none of them will step 2 meters around you once their parents scare the shit out of them. It is no wonder every child that walked into our clinic was bawling his/her head out so much and for so long, that most of the allotted chair time was spent calming the poor kid. Part of the reason I hate pediatric dentistry. Every word I’ve read here I’ve been nodding my head to. Could I post this to my blog please??
Yes, thanks for asking. Could you just please give me the credit for your post? Glad you liked it!
You’re welcome! I hope this is ok!
http://iliketorantandrave.wordpress.com/2011/12/01/10-reasons-your-dentist-probably-hates-you-too/
Great post! I agree 100%. Most patients are nice but it’s the 10% who give you ulcers.
I will never change dentists because there’s Penthouse magazines in the lobby.
Lolabees,
I have never read your blog before, and I have to admit that after reading all of these responses, I’m apprehensive to comment. There seems to be a great deal of attack by others that I do not wish to be subject to! I do, however, want to say “Thank You!” Thank you for helping me understand what those in your (former) profession go through. As a patient, especially if I were in pain, or fearful, I’m not sure that I have thought beyond myself to the needs of the others in the room. I get that I’m the patient, and I need the care, but that does not excuse a lack of common courtesy. Like most others, I’d rather be doing a lot of things than going to the dentist. However, for whatever the reason is, I am there and need to make the best of it! Thankfully, I love my dentist. I do not envy her job, and this blog helps me not only internally appreciate her more, but will also help me externally show it more. So, again, thanks! Best wishes in your new career!
Thank you so much, Kathy! Most people have never read my blog before!!!! I’m actually quite shocked that it has caused such an uproar. Based on your kind response, I can assure you that no one will attack you here
I just posted (not sure where it ended up in the long list of comments) that I am literally sickened by all of the nasty comments. While I originally wanted everyone to have the chance to speak, I can no longer tolerate it, and am starting to censor. So thank you for all the lovely things you’ve had to say. It’s people like you that make our lives so much easier.
Good thing you can reply to this annonymously! My husband is a dentist and I have been working in the front office for the last 11 years. Most patients make HORRIBLE and INAPPROPRIATE comments about money. Most of them make snotty comments about cars they THINK we own, vacations they THINK we have taken, and assume we just put the money in our pockets and skip away, spending it on trivial things. Did they all forget that we provide JOBS for people in our community? That we pay TAXES: payroll taxes, property taxes, unemployment taxes, INCOME taxes – the list goes on and on! I would LOVE to take the money and run, but it just doesn’t work that way. @lolabees – Thank You! for saying what none of us can say UNTIL we retire. For the rest of you who think that dentists are greedy bastards (spelled correctly) stop going to the dentist!!!!!! When you are in pain, or don’t have teeth to chew your food with, maybe you can look back on your comments and think again. Maybe that dentist – you know, the one you said screwed up your TMJ wasn’t that bad. “Boy! I sure wish I would have been nicer to him/her so that I could go back and have him/her fix my pathetic excuse for a mouth.” How about the comment we LOVE to hear the most: “CANDY! You can’t give my child CANDY! Oh, that’s right you’re just trying to drum up business!” Holy cow, folks, REALLY??? Is that the best you can do??? Hit me with your best shot!!! I have heard EVERYTHING!!! Sadly, most of it is insulting, inappropriate and rude. We are a pathetic society.
FrontOfficeHell you are completely right!!! My fiance is in a private practice and the terrible things that some of his patients tell him that he later comes and tells me are atrocious! Why does everyone think they get to treat a medical professional like this?? Half of these people didn’t even graduate high school and yet they feel they have the right to mouth off and be so rude to someone who busted their ass to be able to provide a much needed service to them. People like suggestsmagic (above) do nothing to help the doctor/patient relationship and yet they feel that just because they exist they have the right to treat another human being like a pile of crap. If that’s how they feel they should just stay home. Don’t even bother making an appointment.
I hate going to the dentist. Every time I go to a new one, I fill out the paperwork and history and I put in big letter, “SPENT 6 YEARS IN BRACES AND HEADGEAR BOTH CAP AND NECK” The hygenist reads the history but the dentist doesn’t and the first thing out of his mouth is “So have you ever thought about braces?” I want to kick him in the shin or a bit higher up. I didn’t miss an appointment, I didn’t break appliances or brackets or bands. I had a messed up mouth. I brush 2x a day with tartar control toothpaste I floss at least 3x a day. My teeth aren’t white, They have a grayish tint to them because of the braces.
Hopefully you can find a different dentist that will take more time to get to know you. I can understand why you feel the way you do.
don’t you think it might be sore for a while? –
No! If it was just a filling, then patients are supposed to feel only slight discomfort in the gum where the injection was done. If you had a filling done (without any root treatment) and the tooth started hurting withing a few days, it is wrong. It means: 1) that there is some infection inside and as there is no way for the infection to come out it gives you pain. And if it happens, it’s your dentist’s mistake, because his job is to identify how deep the cavity is and to resolve the problem asap; 2) the filling is too high and needs correction, which the dentist has to do for free, of cause.
Incorrect.
Every time we touch a bur to a tooth, we risk traumatizing the nerve of that tooth to some degree. For most patients, the tooth can handle the trauma, and the nerve can heal, although some sensitivity for a while is completely normal. If the decay is deep and close to the nerve, the trauma of decay removal close to the nerve can cause irreversible damage, and the nerve can die, causing the tooth to need either a root canal or extraction. Neither of these is the dentist’s fault; it’s just the nature of the beast. And it is frequently difficult to determine, even with x-rays, exactly how deep the decay is until we actually get it all removed.
If the decay is deep, that’s the patient’s fault, not the dentist’s.
And yes, if a filling is high, which sometimes happens and can also cause pain, the dentist should adjust it for free.
And a very small number of cases can lead to peripheral neuropathic or central neuropathic pain. This means that the area around the tooth is painful but the pain is not coming from the tooth. Dentists need to be more aware of these types of pain. We see patients everyday with root canals and extractions but the pain persists since the pain generator is not the tooth. The pain if coming from a trauma to the trigeminal system.
And Miss, if you think you know how this “simple procedure” works, why don’t you just self-operate? I wonder if your dentist enjoys seeing you?
I love this. Read the whole thing.
Here’s my gripe about the great profession. When I schedule an appointment, I’m expected to be there at the appropriate time. When I’m late, you’re upset. When I’m on time and you’re late, oh well. My time isn’t valuable. I believe it’s the same as airlines overbooking. Trying to keep schedules filled with the inevitable no shows. However, if I’m “bumped” on an airline, I am compensated for the inconvenience. Not so at my local dentist. Suck it up, you’re lucky we’re seeing you is the perception I get. I try and practice the 10 minute rule. If my scheduled appointment comes and goes by 10 minutes without being attended to, I leave. Common courtesy goes a long way. My 1/4 of a cent.
You are right. As a profession (m.d.s too) we are very disrespectful about other people’s time. However, many people do try hard to stay on time. It was more the exception than the rule that I was ever more than 10 minutes late. Sometimes a procedure goes long and we need to spend the extra time to help the patient in our chair get the best care that they need. What we can only hope for is that our patients are understanding enough that when they need the extra time from us, they can feel confident that we will give it to them. I know, that case is only some of the time, but many of us do try. Thanks for commenting.
You are right that some offices do not respect peoples times, but most do and there are reasons dentists occasionally run late. People forget that even a simple filling is a surgery, and the unexpected can arise during a surgery, thus causing the procedure to take longer than expected and I would think most patients appreciate that we take the extra time to make sure it is done right. Likewise if you show up in my office late because something truly unexpected happened like a car accident or a flat tire we do not get upset. The problem is that every single day we have people come in late simply because they weren’t paying attention to the time. This also causes us to be late with other patients – I think the blogs top 10 addresses that scenario pretty clearly.
Sadly there are usually patient who are repeat offenders in regards to being late, so I hope you are not one of them, and the offices where low cost is paramount have the worst scheduling problems. It is a proven fact that offices that accept low income insurance where the patient pays very little or nothing have the highest appointment failure rate, and these offices are the ones that double book and schedule in the airline manner you described. They have to because the value of their time is categorically ignored by to many of their customers. If this is your experience and you can afford it I suggest you go somewhere else, if you cant afford it at least now you understand the problem and can work to be part of the solution.
You literally bend over backwards?
I’m thinking not so much. I do appreciate that it’s hell on the back, but no one is doing backbends. (Or if you are, I’d love to see it!)
I love this article, as I am very polite to my dentist (and waiters, even the people who come to shut off my utilities if I forgot to pay my bill), and I respect them as well. Often, it’s only as bad as you make it, for sure! My goal in life really is to try to put myself in someone elses’ shoes regularly to understand where someone else is coming from, so we can be the best team, or at least have the best experience when put together as possible.
#4, however, doesn’t do this. I know, it sucks. However, considering most dental insurance still leaves hundreds of dollars for a patient to pay, and Medicaid only covers extractions, most people put it off because they have to pay car insurance, buy food, or pay rent. We don’t do it to upset you. The LAST thing we want is having a Saturday night become a painful dental emergency, and have to call you at dinner to complain. We KNOW you’ve been saying it needs to be fixed for awhile. We KNOW it’s been hurting for 2 weeks and that’s bad, but our car needs gas to be able to drive to work… we’re praying that WE can make it until Monday. So when we call you Saturday night, crying we can’t take the pain we’ve been dealing with for two weeks anymore, it’s not to be a jerk — it’s because we finally are in enough pain that we have to pawn something to pay for the dental work, something we’ll have to figure out how to buy back later. We really don’t spend weeks in pain and call you on a weekend to be a jerk.
Thanks again, Christie for your thoughtfulness. I guess a few of these jokes (#4, for example) are kind of “insider” jokes. We understand emergencies. We really do, but there are a lot of people that do not have the attitude that you have regarding this. When I get an email on my blog, please email me because I would really love to give you the scoop on it– if you have any interest.
Ok, so I’m exaggerating a little bit, and maybe I did on a few other things too, but it’s all tongue in cheek. You are right, we don’t bend over backwards, but we do have to contort quite a bit, putting a lot of strain on our bodies. MAybe I should have said I literally bend over forward?
Oh, and for the record, I actually enjoy the dentist. Call me weird, but I do. I’m actually sad the student I was seeing at the dental college graduated (and I spent months being treated by him, and 10 hours with him so I could be his patient for his board exams). He was a really good guy who does great work and really cares about his patients and the end results. My kids see dentists regularly within 6 months of getting their first tooth or by their first birthday — whichever comes first.
But money is such a big, big issue, and one we’re dealing with in a painful way since my husband was medically discharged from the military, that #4 made me personally sad… seeing as I had my first tooth pulled a few months ago, right after we lost insurance, because I was trying hard to budget to be able to get the crown it needed, but it just got too bad too quickly. I was embarrassed beyond belief to have a tooth get that bad, and now I have to spend my whole life having a (thankfully non-visible) hole in my mouth where a tooth was, all because I had to put it off so I could afford food. So thanks for reading my sob story, but obviously this one point touched me wrong, though the rest of the article is fantastic.
Thanks, Christie. We really are very sympathetic about the situation you describe. My rant on #4 really isn’t about your situation, so I hope you don’t take it to be. I can probably speak for others that it always makes us sad to see people lose teeth. One thing to keep in mind– and maybe you did this already– but if you are ever faced with this again, ask your dentist if there are any options that will hold you over until you can do more definitive treatment. I have extended treatment out for years for people. Thanks for being so kind and understanding, and I wish you lots of luck!
Thanks for the reply! I did have a build up done on one tooth, but we, my dentist and I, had thought the other would be okay until I could afford the crowns for both. I had changed dentists a few times (one was rude and his office lied about finances, and the other was fabulous but did very shoddy work), so that made it that much harder.
I do realize not everyone will have those problems, but I do know for a lot of people, it’s a matter of money, and a source of major embarrassment, unfortunately. I’m so grateful for income tax returns and dental schools, else I’m afraid I’d be missing more teeth by this point. This country really needs to start treating dental health as a more important part of health care, since it really, really is!
Christy,
Your situation is difficult and I think different then what she was referring to in her blog. Most dentists will really help and find hold-over treatment like Lolabees said until you can afford treatment. Sometimes we will even just do treatment for free to buy you time, or accept extended payments outside our normal policies, but the problem is that we simply have too many people asking for these breaks and cant afford to do it for everyone. We really do respect and understand your predicament and would never judge you for your difficult decisions between important priorities
What she is talking about in the blog is the people who can afford it, and simply don’t deal with the problem because of indifference or priority problems that have more to do with self indulgence. We usually know it is a matter of out of wack priorities in these cases because invariably they don’t seem to think twice about talking about their vacation to the Bahamas or their new car while you are there are a Friday night while you should be at home with your family.
This is so funny !!! Great article!
Many thanks, Steven!
You made my day. A friend sent me a link to this and I am dying because it is so true. Thank you for your wit. I absolutely want to post this to my blog. I will credit you. Is that OK?
Absolutely! Thank you so much!
To all of you who think TMD is NOT caused by a faulty filling. YOU ARE WRONG!
If the filling is not anatomically/ morphologically correct, it will in future be the cause of TMJ problems. If the harmony of occlusal contacts is disturbed the load on the Masseter muscle is changed and in the long run might cause the TMJ disc to anteriorly dislocate, causing the patient pain on opening or closing the mouth and alos restricting the movement.
So please before trying to put down the sweet child who named the dysfunction uncorrectly, think if in fact you are right. There were some that weren’t, I suggest they keep up to date with the newest publications, articles and etc. Afterall dentistry is for ever growing science.
This is true. Thanks for keeping us on our toes!
I need to respectfully disagree. Most dentists think TMD is caused by the teeth. Most cases have nothing to do with the teeth. How do I know? I am in a CODA accredited orofacial pain residency and we treat TMD without a high speed handpiece and our patients get better without any irreversible intervention such as occlusal equilibration. Yes, we were taught wrong in dental school when it comes to occlusions role in TMD. Consider that 95% of the population has a bite that could use equilibration. Consider that only about 5% of the population suffers from TMD. If you adjust the teeth, that means you have a 5% chance you are treating disease, which are very poor odds. Occlusion is important but many people with poor occlusion don’t have TMD and many patients with poor occlusion that do have TMD can be treated without touching the teeth. Consider that your teeth should not touch during the day except when swallowing or chewing. A full coverage, hard acrylic splint can be made for sleeping. With this conservative, reversible treatment, you are doing no harm to the patient. Try it. It works.
I think the original post was quite funny in the spirit it was offered! It highlighted that even a career considered desirable and enviable by society at large has some really nasty low points. There’s no such thing as the perfect job anywhere. You have to take the bad with the good, and the emphasis in the post was on the humor of the bad. Even Lolabees, who chose to leave dentistry, could have written a post about good things: the sense of meaning that comes from participating in a profession focused on caring for people; the patients who say “Gee Doc, that’s expensive for me but it’s worth it!”; the patients who cry because they are so moved by how great their smile has become or that they can chew again without pain or discomfort; the patients who thank you for changing their life; the patients who love you so much they absolutely insist all their friends choose you as a dentist. The list goes on.
But, I have to say, the spirit of some of the comments was disturbing. So I offer this …
To those dentists who went into attack-mode on a patient-posted comment that used the wrong clinical terminology, I’m glad you’re not my dentist. To those dentists who held out their DDS’s and DMD’s as proof of being smarter than a non-dentist’s opinion, I’m glad you’re not my dentist. To those dentists who jumped on every little spelling error or typo as a huge character flaw, I’m glad you’re not my dentist. To those dentists who sniffled that patients are rude because they don’t automatically behave in a way that makes your day as easy as possible, I’m glad you’re not my dentist. To those dentists who allowed their staff to schedule a treatment appointment for patients before asking the patient “How will you be paying for that?”, I’m glad you’re not my dentist. To those dentists who complained about how little they get paid on the insurance plans they’ve chosen to participate in, and at the same time gripe about patients who don’t take ownership for their oral health condition, I’m glad you’re not my dentist. To those dentists who whined about not getting a paid vacation as a business owner, I’m glad you’re not my dentist. To those dentists who chose a career with a high education cost and a high start up cost, and then feel that they are entitled to an easy life after that just because they went into debt to get started, I’m glad you’re not my dentist.
I love my dentist. I love that he is profitable. I’d much rather go to a profitable dentist than an unprofitable one, because then I have more confidence that he’s good at what he does. I really can’t judge the quality of what he does inside my mouth because I’m not a dentist. But everything else about him is great: his office, his team, his technology. I know he’s focused on staying on top of his game both clinically and in business. I have no doubt there are challenges to doing that which I am not aware of from my perspective of not being a dentist. That being said though, if he ever once exhibited in front of me some of the immature, defensive, unprofessional, pathetic, finger-pointing attitudes that some doctors have SERIOUSLY shown in this discussion thread to a FUNNY post, I would leave his practice in an instant.
And I suspect that is exactly what is happening to some of you. Attitudes don’t need to be voiced to be heard. It’s one thing to have a laugh over an inside joke, but once you start printing it out, sharing it with your entire team, posting it permanently on the wall in your team area, then you’re really just fostering the understanding in your practice it is OK to demean patients and value them less than you expect them to value you.
If I were a dentist, I would look at my very worst patients and see them as my biggest opportunity — faults and all. If I look in my schedule for today and see a “bad patient” on the roster, the first thing I would do is say to myself and the team, “We are the only people in this patient’s life that have the ability to change their mindset about dentistry and our practice. What can we do today to turn this patient into an amazing patient? What can we do today that will forever change their whole attitude about coming to the dentist? What can we do today to change this person’s life and set them on a path to better health?”
The only way to do this is to be one-on-one with them. Really care for them. Really love them. Really love what you do and how you can help them. They are the ones desperate for your help. When you demean them, dismiss them, joke about them, and behave in front of them like they are a hopeless case, then you are failing the patient more than the patient is failing you.
Thanks you for so eloquently putting all of these things in perspective. You are right! I just hope that besides the anger and nastiness going on here from some of the commenters, you can not think we are too awful for having a laugh with our staff over this post
Just trying to add some humor– thanks for getting that!
You are awesome.
twonineteentrain,
I agree with a lot of what you’ve said, but, really, not the last two paragraphs. I know it SOUNDS great for us to try to motivate our patients, but the truth is, just as for any change anyone wants to make in their life, the motivation has to come from within. If they don’t care about their dental health, they don’t, and that’s that. We should educate them, definitely, but constantly trying to change the priorities of an indifferent patient is a losing battle, and the path to burn-out. It’s like expecting an alcoholic to give up drinking just because his doctor/wife/friend recommends it – until he WANTS to, for his own reasons, he won’t.
We dentists have several sayings for these patients:
“Teeth weren’t meant for everybody.”
“We can’t care more about their teeth than they do.”
I am not rude or dismissive of them, but I can only control MY behavior, not theirs. I give them the information and advice they need; what they do with it is up to them.
Wow Sandra! I think you’ve really missed my point at the end. I wasn’t suggesting that you engage in a heart-wrenching emotional intervention that leaves everyone in the practice wracked with feelings of despair and self-doubt if the patient doesn’t rise to the challenge. And I wasn’t trying to suggest that there is one thing you can do that will “magically” transform that patient into an overnight super-patient. I know that you probably hear “no” all day long in your profession, and that must be hard to deal with. I think part of your response seems to reflect that: “If they don’t care … they don’t, and that’s that.” You feel the need to detach yourself from disappointment, and thinking that way is one way to do that.
But I really disagree with you that motivation can only come from within. If that were true, we wouldn’t have world leaders, we wouldn’t have salespeople, we wouldn’t have managers or CEOs, we wouldn’t have religious leaders, we wouldn’t have a diet industry, or a fitness industry, or a fashion industry, or even teachers. Motivation surrounds us all the time. People are influenced hugely by external forces and, in particular, by the people that are around them. I’m sure you spend a lot of time thinking about how to motivate your own staff. Sometimes we do it with a smile. Sometimes with a stick. Sometimes with a system. How many of your staff would you describe as “naturally self-motivated”. Few people are. Most people just slide through each day if they are left to their own devices. Powerful people become powerful because they influence a lot of people to think the way they think, or want what they tell them to want. Steve Jobs comes to mind as the most obvious example in recent years. He shifted people’s priorities in a huge way. How many of your patients said “no” to the last treatment you recommended because they maxed out their credit card buying an iPad and upgrading the whole family to the newest iPhones? Would you consider those technology purchases even half as important as your recommended treatment? After all, that technology will all need to be replaced in 2 years, but your treatment is going to benefit them for the rest of their lives.
People’s priorities can be influenced, and any people-driven business should recognize this as the first rule of success. Sometimes that influence occurs in very small ways — a different choice of words, body language, a story, something out of the ordinary. I’ve been to enough dental offices and enough dental appointments in my life that I know the “system.” Most dental appointments are about as routine and familiar as doing the laundry. Nothing new, heard it all before, let’s just get it over with. Five minutes after I’ve left the office, everything that happened is forgotten. No influence happening at all.
Now, a confession: I’ve been a bad flosser most of my life. A great educated dental patient, but a really delinquent hopeless non-flosser. I can’t tell you how many times a hygienist has said the same things to me about flossing. In fact, I got to the point that when I saw a new hygienist, the first thing I would say is: “I don’t floss. Yes I know flossing is important. Yes I know how to floss. Yes I know it only takes a few minutes. Yes I know I can floss watching TV. Yes I know I can get a handle that makes flossing easier. But I don’t floss.” And they’d laugh. And that’s that (to use your language). That’s pretty much how things were for 20 years.
Then one day, my hygienist did something out of the ordinary … in fact, extraordinary. At the end of the appointment, she sat me up in the chair, came around facing me eye-to eye and said: “I want you to know that I really like you. I look forward to seeing you every time you’re in the schedule. But I want to talk to you seriously about your health for a moment, because I’m concerned. We both know that you are a smoker and you’ve been trying to quit for a while. I want you to keep trying. But as a smoker, and not flossing, you’re really putting yourself in an extremely high risk category for periodontal disease. Already there are signs of it in your mouth and its getting worse every time I see you. (She showed me images, gave me numbers). So can I ask a favor? An easy one? (I nodded). When you go home today, can you promise me for the next three weeks that you will floss at least once per day? Just for three weeks. Just to try it. For me. It becomes a habit, just like smoking, but a good habit that soon you’ll be very happy with. Can you try that for me? (I nodded) And, I’d like your permission to call you once a week just to help you keep your promise. Is it OK if I called you? (I nodded). Can you give me your mobile number and I’m going to program it into my phone right now? (I gave it to her and she did.) Now, the first call I’m going to make is tomorrow because that’s going to be the hardest day for you to start your new habit. What is a good time to call you tomorrow? (I gave her a time.)
Well, she called. And she called a week after that. And a week after that. And a week after that. The whole conversation chairside was about 3 minutes. Each of the calls were about 20 seconds. I have flossed everyday of my life since then (“4 years flosser” as an AA person might say.) The point isn’t so much what she said but how she said it. Eye-to-eye. Different language. Personalized. She changed my life, didn’t she?
My next visit was a happy one for that reason, and I thanked her. Then I asked her if she does that for everyone. She said she picks about 10 patients she knows each month that can really be helped by developing better home care habits. So she ends up making about 1 call a day on average. I asked her what the success rate is. “In a good month, about 2 patients will follow through. But that’s a good start!”. God I love her for that.
Anyways, my point is that you may think your job is only to educate and give advice, but really your job is to influence choices (which education and advice are part of), and you should be creative about that and try to find the triggers that work with different types of patients, even the worst. And if you don’t think you are an influencer, then just look at your practice system for hygiene. How many of your “good” patients do you think would, on their own accord, pick up the phone every six months and call to schedule their hygiene visit? Suppose you said to them at the end of today’s visit, “We won’t call you. You should call us to come back in six months.” Some, but really very few would call in six months. Some others might call when they “remembered” 9 months or a year later. Lots would probably just disappear from your practice.
Even “good” people need to be influenced to make the right choices at the right time. That’s why you send those cards and letters and make those phone calls. Because people have a million things competing for priority in their life, and the important things don’t always get noticed even if they are important. You send those cards and letter and make those phone calls to remind them of what’s important. Ultimately, it’s their choice to schedule or not, but you’ve influenced that choice.
Part of your job as a dentist is to continually help the patient prioritize. But if you don’t see it that way, I understand. But Sandra, can I ask a favor? An easy one? One that will make me happy because it will be something out of the ordinary for those indifferent patients, and one that will make you happy because it will remove the stress and potential for burnout in your life?
Take a look at all those patients about whom you think “Teeth weren’t meant for everybody.” when you see them. (Those would be the patients you’ve decided are hopeless, otherwise you wouldn’t say it.) At their next visit to your office for any reason, just do this: Sit down in front of them, eye-to-eye, and say “I’ve given up on you. You show no interest in what I’m trying to do for you, and I can’t do anything more for you. Here are your records. Good luck finding another dentist.” (Remember, keep it personalized … I’VE given up on YOU … looking right into their eyes.)
Now I realize this is called “firing a patient” and there are good reasons to do so sometimes. But really, I think that if you, as the doctor, don’t think that a patient DESERVES TEETH — that your negativity around their past choices so completely obliterates any spark of belief that you could ever find something that would be a first step for the patient toward better future choices — that it’s not even worth making the effort to try to find some new way to connect to them besides telling them the same thing over and over again in the same way — then that must be the all-time highest and most important reason to let a patient go (more than because they’re bad paying their bills or they are late all the time).
Because the truth is, as patients, we know that when we say “no” to recommended treatment, we are not making the “right” choice. It may be a “practical” choice based on current circumstances, but we know we are disappointing you. Dental patients are like school children. They have limited knowledge. They’re easily distracted. They’re fidgety. They’ve got some bad habits. Some have bad attitudes. Some are not too smart. But what is our expectation of school teachers of our children? A child who is troublesome, doesn’t do their homework, has bad study habits, isn’t that smart … is it acceptable for the teacher to say “not worth the effort” and focus their energies on only the brightest and most cooperative students? If that were the case, it’s better for us that they just let us know. We need our teachers or dentists or care providers to be caring, not just to provide care. And really, that would mean they have to care about education, or teeth or whatever more than we care ourselves, doesn’t it?
All right, I’ll bite. Kudos to your hygienist for getting you to floss. But your hygienist’s intervention did seem to me to approach a heart-wrenching emotional intervention. And in my opinion, the time spent on phone calls is a misappropriation of resources which could be better used in providing care to patients who value my services and their teeth.
And I disagree with your examples. Do world leaders really motivate those who don’t already agree with them? Not most of them. Most followers consist of those who already shared their views. Do CEO’s motivate employees, or does the employee’s need for a job and enjoyment of his or her career motivate him or her? Salespeople sell customers things they already need or want. And the diet and fitness industries – well, we have an obesity epidemic, so how is that working out?
I actually only have 2 employees – one at the front desk, and one chairside assistant. And I do very little to motivate them, because I don’t have to. They both have excellent work ethics and are always trying to look for ways to make our practice run more efficiently, better serve our patients, or make the day brighter. I believe I discussed my assistant, in particular, in a past post. I do make sure to tell them how much I value all they do, but, even when I forget, they’re always there, giving their jobs their all.
And frankly, I thing you’re being a bit judgmental in that you seem to think I’m dismissive of patients who have made poor choices. It depends on that patient’s current attitude. I recently treated a woman who was getting out of an abusive relationship, and who admitted to a past drug problem which had wreaked havoc on her teeth. She was ashamed to smile, because she had large, dark cavities in her front teeth. And she was petrified of the dentist. I didn’t judge her for her past decisions; I praised her for working to improve her situation. I worked carefully and slowly with her, trying to make her experience as painless and stress-free as possible, and I restored her teeth so that she could smile with confidence. When we handed her a mirror, she started crying because she was so grateful, and my assistant and I joined in.
So, no, my “negativity” does not obliterate belief in the patient. I’m always glad to help those who help themselves, and to praise progress, which I suppose you could consider to be providing motivation. But the motivation to make that progress has to come from within the patient. By scheduling a consultation or scheduling an appointment to follow my recommended treatment plan, they show me they are motivated.
But I’ve also had a patient tell me, in all seriousness, that he thought everyone’s teeth should be “pulled” when they came in, because they were nothing but trouble, anyway. And when I meet this 60-some-year-old man who doesn’t bother to shower, let alone brush and floss, and thinks teeth are just trouble, I’m being pretty unrealistic to think I’m going to change his attitude.
And yes, I have “fired” patients. I dismiss the chronic no-showers, non-payers (which, when you do this for a living and not as a hobby, is just as valid a reason as noncompliance), and blatant drug-seekers. Verbal abuse of my staff members earns you a one-way ticket out the front door, and a phone call to the police if you don’t comply (see blatant drug-seekers). And I have also told patients who have repeatedly not followed through on treatment or their home care that we are both wasting our time, and there is no reason for them to schedule another exam to reveal problems they’ve known about but not had addressed for years, despite multiple approaches, including education, asking them how I can help them follow through, and calling all around the area to find a sedation dentist they trusted, when fear was the issue. So, as to your advice, been there, done that. And because that has left me with a pool of patients with many more good than bad, you’re right, it has helped me avoid burnout.
I also think it’s my more pragmatic attitude that has kept me from wanting to change careers, like so many others on this forum. I want what’s best for my patients, but I can’t want it more than they do. I see providing care for them as a team effort, with their role being just as important as mine, if not more so. But if THEY don’t see it that way, I don’t stress over it, and I don’t berate or belittle them. I inform them of the possible consequences of their neglect, and let them own their problems. I enjoy my work, and really like and respect the vast majority of my patients, and have no intention of changing careers. I don’t even want to retire early. But I devote the most mental energy to the patients most likely to benefit from my care.
I didn’t mean to imply you were dismissive of any patient who had made past poor choices. I just meant that when you’ve given up on them completely because of your experience with them in the practice, it’s really in your best interest and theirs to tell them so and show them the door. And I’m glad to hear that you do when it is appropriate. Yes, every business has to be pragmatic about the fact that not every client can be accommodated.
I’m really glad that you love your career and want it to continue as long as possible. With two employees and you’re taking home as much as $130k in a year (I believe that’s what you said in a previous comment somewhere), it’s a tremendous business model. I’d be hard pressed to think of more than a handful of other jobs outside the healthcare industry that can achieve that. Most people would give their eye teeth for a chance at that! (just a little joke! … Are two eye teeth worth about the same as dental school tuition? … I’ll ask my insurance broker or perhaps a personal injury attorney!)
As an aside, with respect to your comment about the patient who thought all teeth should just be pulled, I couldn’t help but think about my mother. She’s always had an overwhelming fear of going to the dentist (even though she always made sure my sister and I went for as long as I can remember). In her late 60s, she had a tooth that was causing her a lot of pain. She was actually pretty lucky for her it took that long for a serious problem to occur. She went to our family dentist (who must have been in his mid to late 70s by then) and told him she just wanted all her teeth pulled and to get dentures. You see, my father has had dentures all his adult life — since his early 20s before I was even born and before they were even married. She saw dentures as an obvious and permanent solution to the pain and whatever future pain might come from her teeth. Thank god good old Dr. T absolutely refused. He literally said to my mom, “I won’t do that, and you won’t find another dentist in this town that is going to pull all your teeth and give you dentures based on the condition of your mouth.” (He was fairly confident about the other dentists in town because most of them had started as associates in his practice.) Of course, the tooth just needed root canal therapy and a crown. (Although after the RCT and crown prep, my mom went for 6 months with a temporary before getting up the nerve to go back for the final lab-made crown.)
Thank you Sandra for engaging me in this exchange. I’ve really enjoyed it and learned a lot. You’ve challenged my thinking on some of my really core ideas, and I hope I said a pearl or two that has challenged you too! After getting to know you a bit through these comments, I think your patients are pretty damn lucky.
Thank you, as well. I did learn a bit, or at least acknowledged that I was providing some motivation in the form of praise that I didn’t realize I was providing. I guess it’s just so much part of how I operate, I don’t think about it much. I apologize for being defensive.
I’ve met patients like your mother many times, and almost always convinced them to maintain their natural teeth. Perhaps not the tooth that is hurting, but at least enough to avoid a full denture. And, like your dentist, if they persist in demanding full mouth extractions and dentures, I politely tell them I can’t in good conscience act against their own best interests, and I’m sure no other dentist in town will, either. “First, do no harm.” Yes, I could make a fair bit of money extracting all their teeth and making dentures, but it would leave them with a compromised ability to chew and talk, and I won’t do it.
And as far as the eye teeth, well, they’re the most valuable teeth your mouth, so they might add up to dental school tuition
. Of course, I don’t know how much that is, now, so maybe not. My business model is actually small potatoes compared to many dental offices – dentistry seems to be trending toward multi-dentist practices with each dentist supervising several hygienists, and more assistants and business staff to keep the practice running smoothly. These folks make a lot more money than I do, but I would (and do) gladly trade their added income for my small, homey practice.
WOW. I took this initial bit of writing a lot more light hearted than a lot of other folks.
Me too
Hey suggestsmagic, if you don’t want people jumping down your throat for making one small mistake then maybe you should think before you post some terribly hurtful and hateful comments about an entire professional community. Don’t get hurt because everyone responded so violently to something that you started. Pull your head out for just a moment the next time you even think of posting something so terribly mean and hurtful. And if at the end of the day you decide the snarky comment is still worth posting then toughen up a bit and suck it up when people respond back with the same amount of violence. Don’t act so shocked! I mean seriously?? Get over yourself!!
Perfection. Just perfection. I adore this perspective. Thank you so much for sharing. I am also a dentist {albeit a new one} and I swear I had every single one of these things happen to me just yesterday alone. Sometimes I wonder why whyyyyy did I WANT to do this job?!
You’re welcome! There are a lot of reasons why. Don’t lose sight of them. And if you do, that’s ok too, maybe then it’s time for a change! Thanks!
I LOVE this post! This is how I feel in my forty-hours-in-four-days workweek. No wonder I write on the weekends!
Seriously, thanks again for the post it made my day, as well as everyone else’s day in the office.
Thank you! It was meant to be FUN!!!!
Ooooooh, thank you so much
I’m a dentist, and I enjoyed reading this!!!!!
It is like I feel better now…
Isn’t it? Glad to hear it helped you too!
Wow. Just because you are “hidden” behind a screenname, you feel ok to use “fuck, piss off” and the like? I suddenly think a lot less of these so called “professionals”. In regards to the original post, I am sure almost every profession can come up with a list of reasons their job stinks from time to time. And while I have 80K in student loans due to higher education, I am thankful to have a paying job that supports my family. Time to sit back and take a look at the bigger picture here, people.
Thanks for weighing in!
Don’t forget “I hate shots”
To be honest, that one doesn’t really bother me. If venting about that particular anxiety helps the patient to deal with it, I can listen and empathize. It also lets me know that I should take particular care with this patient, to give as atraumatic an injection as possible. If I’m pretty sure the procedure I’m doing is going to be painless or nearly so, I offer the option of trying without anesthetic. Frequently, the patient gets along just fine, often says it didn’t hurt a bit, and appreciates avoiding the feared injection and hours of numbness.
Lolabees, I have really enjoyed your post and the responses. Would you allow me to link to your blog and use it as the basis of my next blog?
I love #6!!! It is so in your face!! Everything stated is so true and right on!!! We know these things already, but when you read if from someone else you tend to just appreciat it more!!!
Thanks, Kristen! I don’t even remember what #6 is by now! Haha!
+1 triatheletedentist, Natasha LarsonDMD & JeffBuenoDDS!
Hysterical post!…is that all it takes is some incendiary dental comment to get the peanut gallery lit up?
My dentist used the J & the D–he called it TMJ-Dysfunction. I guess mine was extreme. One morning I yawned, my jaw clicked, & I couldn’t open my mouth for 2 weeks. I ate only soft foods and liquids and couldn’t brush or floss. It took a while to find a dentist that knew what to do. I could make long lists of what I love and don’t love in a dentist.
I had to reply to this — even had to go to the car to get the laptop because I just couldn’t type this out on my phone.
First, I am sorry this whole comment section started off with a bad reply from someone who had certainly learned a lot about dentistry. I am sorry for her remarks as well as many of the responses.
Second, I want to tell all of you who are dentists how much I appreciate you. I am a “difficult” dental case who has been in the chair a LOT as an adult, correcting things that went wrong long ago. In 2003 I finally got a crown on a tooth that had my first root canal — in 1973. Yes, it took 30 years for that tooth to return to being the priority as far as my care plan. I’m one of those patients with a small mouth and boney structures that make front X-rays particularly difficult. I may cry, but I do my very best to accommodate the films so you can get the image.
I found a wonderful dentist in 1979. He worked with me on my dental issues for nearly 30 years before we went different directions, and I am so sorry to have lost him as part of my care team. Through all the root canals, wisdom teeth, crowns, bridge, etc., he was my champion.
Why? First, because he was a good dentist who knew his stuff. Of course. Second (maybe more importantly) he treated me with great respect. He would ALWAYS talk to me about the treatment plan, and he would talk to me while he worked on my teeth. He would always let me know what was going on, even explaining medical terms to me (probably because it can be really boring to just sit in the dentist’s chair endlessly looking in pitiful mouths.) He educated me and we worked hard to improve my dental status. Yes, I have a lot of restorations, and I am so very grateful that when I needed them done, I had a job and dental insurance and a dentist who made it all possible.
I cannot tell you how many times I was under nitrous oxide and I was just in awe of what it takes to be a dentist. In that state I could appreciate not only his chairside manner, his medical knowledge, his dental knowledge, but also the engineering it takes to do good restoration work and the artistry in creating a great smile. It sometimes took us quite a long time to decide which shade would be best for a crown, because he was determined to make it look like a good match.
I loved my dentist. I appreciate all that each of you do. I appreciate that you have spent YEARS learning how to do this, that it takes many more YEARS for you to get established in your practices and it is a bloody expensive profession for you.
I learned a few things: I won’t cut my own hair — how would I dare ever have the audacity to think I know more about dentistry than someone who has given their life to it? Second: I have learned never to look for bargains in brain surgery or dentistry. Just because the guy with the lowest grades in dental school is still called “doctor” doesn’t mean all dentists are created equal.
Thanks again to all of you who care about your patients as much as my dentist did. Excuse me, I need to go floss now.
Beverly, thank you so much for many things. Thank you for caring about your health and for those around you. Thank you for sharing your knowledge with such grace and dignity. Thank you for having faith in your dentist to help you decide what is best for you. There are so many people out there like you, and you are what makes dentists love their profession. And for those of us like me who sometimes doubt what we are doing, you are what makes us smile at the end of a day and feel like we can do it all over again tomorrow– and actually enjoy it. Thank you for going out to get your laptop. Oh, and thank you for flossing!
Beverly, thanks for sharing your experiences and support. You’re the type of patient I love working with. I don’t mind if a patient has challenging needs or is petrified of being in my office, so long as they try to let me do my job, and appreciate my efforts.
In fact, one of my favorite patients, who passed away a few years ago, was also one of my most challenging as far as the work he needed. Every time he showed up, I knew I was going to be wracking my brain trying to figure out how to repair whatever problem he had this time. He had a lot of old dental work that was failing spectacularly faster than we could fix it. We were constantly putting out fires. But, the minute he walked in the door, the office got brighter. He was one of the most positive people I’ve ever met. Even if he was in pain, he dealt with it philosophically, even cracking a bunch of jokes about the mess he was in. He always had a story to share – he had I forget how many degrees, and had travelled all over the world. He was just a gem, and if I had a hundred patients like him, difficult procedures and all, I’d love it.
Lolabees: Did you really leave dentistry? I am a dentist too and really don’t like it but I feel a bit stuck. I would love to talk to you about that if you have time.
I love your list and I am printing it out to bring into my office tomorrow! So are you still a dentist?? I was a bit confused by the beginning statement? If not, what do you do now? Just curious!
Haha, they obviously read the blog and realised it was based on them and took offense so then posted a bad comment. I love this blog and I’m not even a dentist, I’m a dental receptionist.
I guess I’m one of the few people who enjoy going to the dentist. I love the way my teeth feel when the hygienist finishes with them. I’ve had a lot of dentists in my 51 years, and I don’t have any complaints about any of them.
I have been surprised that I had to learn about the impact of healthy (or, rather, unhealthy) teeth and gums from my veterinarian. My veterinarian taught me about the linkage between gum disease and other problems in my pets (I drew the link to humans). I don’t think I’ve ever heard it from anyone on my human medical teams.
This is so true. My whole life I’ve had a bad immune system and only recently did I learn it could very well be because of gum disease and other tooth problems. Your mouth really does impact the rest of your body in amazing ways.
When I was a child I had a horrible dentist. He was just mean. I remember a child in the next room screaming and it scared me. He told me the child was getting his teeth ripped out because he ate candy. Then he put this rubber screen thing in my mouth to stop me from swallowing his tools.
He never believed me when I told him I could still feel it even after he gave me 1 needle of novacaine.
Now I have a great dentist. He is as gentle as he can be, he freezes my mouth with the gel before giving me the min. 3 needles I need to freeze my mouth. Then he waits a couple minuites to make sure I am frozen. He even hides the needle so you can’t see it. My son who is 8 loves going to see him. He is amazing. If you are unhappy with your dentist find a new one,
Yes! What a success story that many of us can learn from. Glad you were able to turn a bad situation into a good one. We dental geeks love to help people do this.
I love your list, I’ve been a dental nurse for 28 years now and I love my job. Its interesting that you have the same comments from patients over there that we have in Ireland. This could have been written by an Irish based dentist . I’ve enjoyed reading the comments on here, I’m sorry that dentistry hasn’t worked out for you, and I hope you have a happier time in whatever you decide to do next. Who knows maybe you’ll come back to dentistry in the future.
Thanks, Carol! I guess people are people, right? Glad you love your job! Who knows, maybe I will be back someday!
The only thing I have to say, I guess, is that sometimes people can’t afford to see you when they need to. I don’t know of anyone who would willingly let a cavity go by untreated – or anything else. I was 16 when a tooth of mine started to go bad but couldn’t get it fixed until I had moved out and got a job on my own that provided enough to pay things like the dentist. Unfortunately for many of us now food and other necessities have to come first.
You are right. Thanks for your addition to the story.
Dentists are trained for many years to provide a healthcare service in which their patients are well looked after, are pain/disease free and can function on a day to day basis. This encompasses chewing function so you can eat, speech function so you can form words and aesthetic functions so you can present yourself in public. All these issues are so important to our day to day lives and nobody would like to live without them. Therefore no-one that has not trained for a number of years to provide these services should be allowed to make rash comments on how the profession is performed. Yes a filling may be expensive from time to time, but it saves you from pain and suffering and provides you with the benefits previously mentioned which significantly increase your quality of life.
Nice posting. Seems like it’s close to going viral
It was funny as I can relate to all the points. In my opinion, both dentists and patients have valid points but before attacking, accusing and blaming one another, they should take a step back, take a deep breath, calm down and put themselves in the other person’s shoes/situation. They need to understand and respect each other, communicate, educate and be patient, just like a marriage. I’m sure most people would probably call this wishful thinking
I, also, am not practicing dentistry anymore. I am curious to know why you left the profession.
My thoughts exactly. I’ll have an email soon, and we can connect… would love to hear your story too.
Trop fort!
Haha, I just LOVE reading this!
I’ve never understood why people dreaded going to or even hated their dentist. I really didn’t mind. Probably because most of my uncles/aunts/cousins are dentists and getting my mouth looked at wasn’t such a big deal. And I love my family, so I’m a person who LOVES their dentist.. well, dentists (:
I tell my patients that I don’t like sitting in the “big chair” any more than they do because of my own dental experience as a young man (tauma related dentistry not dental trauma in the chair).Bu I can empathathise with their concrns and we get through the appointments together. I have been practicing for 25+ yaers and while somedays you can have the whole thing for a $1.25 I would not trade it for the world. Hope you have found your true calling I know I have mine. Loved the list!!
Finally somebody says what we all feel. Most if my patients are great, but this small minority ruins it for everybody. People should educate themselves before making comments and assumptions about dentists. I just opened a new practice and at this point it is a labor of love.
I’m not a great writer so I may have grammatical errors or even spell words incorrectly but I do want to share something.
The thing I like about the internet is that it allows us to share ideas and thoughts not only to people we know but also worldwide. However, I “hate” (and i don’t like using the that word) it when people take advantage of it and use it as a shield to say some really nasty things…all behind a computer screen. this applies to everyone!
When I first read this article, I thought it was funny and I thought to myself… “finally!! somebody in the dental profession speaks out.” There’s soooo many articles, rants, youtube videos, movies poking fun at this profession but I have yet to hear someone from our field share our experiences.
Any type of customer service is difficult and that includes being a dentist. I think what makes it worst is when people don’t even like to come see us! We want to help and a lot of us really spend the time to educate and talk to patients and it really sucks when we’re not appreciated for what we do. Medical doctors listen to your heart, breathing patterns, check your eyes, nose etc…ALL without doing anything too invasive. They are there to help you too but how come they are usually viewed as heroes while people hate us.
I know money is a HUGE issue and times are tough. I grew up not having dental AND medical insurance. Needed dental work gets pushed aside when there’s bills, bills and more bills. Bottom line is though.. we didn’t put the decay there. We are here to help and it’s fine when you call in and want some pain meds or antibiotics but please don’t blow us off when we ask for you to come in for a follow up just to get a broken appt (sometimes).
There are some dentists out there who give good ones a bad name just like there are bad patients out there that give good patients a bad name. That’s why people write these lists…to poke fun! If you enjoy reading “why I hate dentists” rants, be open minded to hear it from the other side. it’s only fair!
This post is incredibly arrogant. First of all, when people say, “I hate the dentist,” it is not intended to be personal as in they hate you, but rather going to the dentist. I am pretty sure most people understand that. Dentists cause pain, gouge your bank account, and their clinics have disgusting smells. Who doesn’t hate the dentist? It doesn’t mean we aren’t grateful for dentists who take care of our oral health, or that we hate that individual, it just means we hate going to the dentist.
Point number 4, how it irritates you that people wait months before getting a cavity filled. Did it ever occur to you people have lives and schedules? It doesn’t seem strange to me that people wait a few months between check up and filling, they have to find the time and perhaps save up. Years in between? Maybe they are scared of the dentist, another not so uncommon phenomenon. Maybe they put it off for months and years because the thought of you drilling holes in their teeth or even the needle for the anesthetic frightens them. There are actual phobias for this out there. In your “hundreds of thousands” dollar education did you learn nothing of human compassion, human psychology or fears?
You said, “If it hurts please tell me.” How do you expect people to do this when their wide open mouth is full of tools and your hands? You hate the wincing so much? How else are we supposed to get your attention? And on that note, why does the dentist strike up conversations with us while they have their hands and tools in our mouths? As if you are the hair dresser and you want to chat. We can’t speak with our mouths full.
Anyway, sorry to rant, it is just so arrogant that you hate so many things about the people who allow dentists to live the lavish lifestyles they do. It irritates me that most dentists are dentists simply for the money and then complain like crazy about it. What did you think you were getting into? And what profession/job out there is 100% perfect anyway?
Hi. Sorry, I’m not exactly a dentist, just a dentistry student, so I have not really experienced anything the author have said. However, I’d like to point out that, personal or not, when people say they hate you, that’s just plain rude. So far, I’ve noticed that I get two kinds of reactions from people when I say that I’m taking dentistry. The nice people would laugh/smile and say, “I dislike going to the dentist” or sometimes, “I’m scared of dentists”. Even when they said, “I hate dentists” (which they RARELY do), they’d say it in a way that lets you know that it’s not meant to be hurtful. Just a few days ago, I bumped into an old ‘friend’ and when he learned that I’m a dental student, he said “I hate dentists” in sort of a provoking manner. He went on complaining about the noises and the pain. Seriously, it’s just not nice telling someone in the face that you hate what the person does for a living. And it’s terribly rude to go to a person for his services and then letting him know that you don’t like him. Jokes are ok, but acting all haughty and telling it straight to a person that you hate what he does shows a lack of manners.
About point #4…. It wasn’t the fact that people wait for months to get a filling that’s irritating; It’s the fact that people wait AND THEN call the dentist at an inappropriate time. “Two weeks of pain go by, and you call me on a Saturday night while I am at dinner with friends because your tooth that needed a filling a year ago and that started hurting 2 weeks ago is suddenly an emergency.” You said people have lives, well dentists are people too. My dad, who is also a dentist, had at times, received calls when he is off duty from patients like these. One time, we were out of town when he received a call from a patient, on a weekend family getaway. It’s as if the patient thinks my dad is always available for his beck and call. Now that’s just plain arrogant.
And about not being able to tell the dentist when it hurts? I’ve had dental treatments from dentists other than my dad. When it hurts too much, I’d make a sound. Usually the dentist would get it. And as for the conversation, well, I’ve asked my dad about that once. He said, would you rather have a stifling quiet treatment where you could hear each and every noise the handpieces are making? Usually, the dentists do that to get your mind off what he’s doing. Admittedly, it doesn’t always works. Still, if you’d rather be treated as a dummy and be ignored throughout the whole procedure, you could always request it.
And lastly, I’ve known a lot of dentists. My dad is one, his friends are, and my lecturers are all dentists. Have I heard them complaining? Well, who doesn’t, about anything? But ‘like crazy’? Um… not really. My dad does get annoyed by some patients sometimes, but he was never one to complain like crazy.
Sorry if this seems like a rant. Just wanting to share my views.
Thank you for clarifying with some really great points!
Great post, mel. I tell my patients to raise their hand if anything hurts. We all also try to be sensitive to our patients’ facial expressions and body language as an indicator of pain, which is probably why it stresses us out when you flinch when it doesn’t actually hurt.
My mother raised me in an environment that allowed me to appreciate the dentist. Because when you are sick and go to the doctor, you dont go home feeling better. When you go,to the dentist, you leave with clean, shiny, teeth that feel like polished rubies!
And I love my dentist. We are getting married
Congrats!
First, I just have to express a bit of jealousy as a fellow blogger/dentist – you’ve received more comments on this one post that I have with my last 2.5 years of blogging combined! LOL Oh well, good for you! I’ve shared this on my FB, Twitter, and G+ pages, ’cause I think it’s hilarious.
Good for you to have the strength to walk away from something that wasn’t right any longer. I’ve always loved dentistry, and honestly, I am loving it a lot more now that I actually get paid for it well, instead of just paying all the student and bank loans (not that they’re gone yet, not even after 13 years, but they’re a lot more manageable, and I can feed my family a lot better). But it’s wonderful that you’ve found a new niche where you are happy, and it even seems like you’re inspiring some other dentists who’ve felt the same way! That crazy “Natalie” who posted before, her especially! (BTW – I’ve been friends with her online for about 8 years now, so that’s a friendly poke, not a real insult. LOL)
Definitely looking forward to reading more of your blog posts!
BTW — I’ve been blogging with WordPress for over 2 years now – if you need any help, I’d be glad to help in any way I can – if you’ll just help me figure out how to get so much interaction!
)))
found this article on facebook through a dentist i used to work for. couldn’t stop laughing and had to share with all my coworkers/dental friends..
can i add to the list?! my biggest pet peeve ever = when patients TAKE OFF THEIR SHOES.
are you in your house?
are you at the spa?
NO YOU’RE AT THE DENTIST. KEEP YOUR SHOES ON, i don’t want to look at your ugly feet, nor smell them while im working on you!!!
Simple solution: socks or slippers – add it to the bill.
Lolabees, this article has been a joy to read..! And on a completely random note, your new haircut is so chic!
If you haven’t seen this YouTube video yet that describes the typical dental patient, I truly believe you will have a great appreciation for it.. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SfR0mT2DSDw
I have just recently started to work in private practices after finishing a residency program, and I couldn’t agree more with your list. But what tops my list the most is when I get asked “Are YOU the doctor?” (even AFTER I introduce myself as Dr.____) ARGH, words cannot describe the angst!
I hear the comment “I hate the dentist” so often that I’ve begun to correct patients by saying “You don’t hate the dentist; you hate dental PROCEDURES”.
I wish you the best of luck with your new career..!
HAHA
Very true, I am one of those people who grew up in a small town, we had a dental nurse in our school, My FEAR came from then. I brush, floss, rinse with mouth wash, in my hopes to avoid going to the dentist…. I am sorry for being afraid, it turns fear into haterd, not for you, but for the experience. I am a massage therapist, I love my job, I hope your new path is enjoyable for you.
To all my past dentists, I’m sorry! I even made the “buy him a car” crack. I will try to behave better in the future. As a little boy my mom and the nurse dragged me kicking and screaming to the chair (might as well have been the electric chair). This may not come as a surprise but as a grown man, that little boy is still alive and well in side of me.
I LOVE YOUR ARTICLE!
Finally someone had the courage to say what we, dentists, have been holding in for years. We have been taking all this BS from our patients but couldn’t say anything back to them. Every item on your list is absolutely true. Those who don’t like your article, are those people who give us the most trouble and think we owe them something. Thanks for speaking out and telling the forbidden truth!
Wow, didn’t know people had so much to say about dentists
. I don’t hate dentists I actually appreciate the good ones. I will confess that I am scared of dental work because of a really scary tooth extraction I had when I was quiet young. It just stuck to me. And in those days the dentist where more “suck it up” kind. I make it a point to go to the younger generation now, no age discrimination, I just feel that now a days they are more considerate and have better chair side manners 
. I had a wisdom tooth extracted two years ago and the dentist gave me repeated shots because the area was not going numb. He waited 45 min before he could take out the tooth. Some dentists would have just told me to “suck it up”. All dentists like people are not the same. No professional is. So i suggest that people should try a dentist for simpler procedures like cleaning and a filling to see if they like them and should go back if there is any future issues. I read another dentists article and he mentioned that dentist had higher suicidal tendencies because the feeling of causing all that pain lead to depression. I can understand that. I appreciate dentists. They have a hard job, looking into a disgusting mouth for hours is enough for me. And I agree that people do not follow the instructions given to them by dentists or any doctor, and then they complain that they have the same issues again. I am one them I don’t floss as often as I should and end up with scaling appointments (sorry). So thank to all the good dentists and orthodontists out there for making life easier and giving us a great smile.
I loved this article and the comments- both good and bad actually support exactly what you were writing about to begin with. Being a dentist is a great profession and luckily there are great patients who become our family and make us smile:) It’s not always easy but worth taking the unappreciative patients (10 reasons your dentist probably hates you too) for the fabulous ones.
Could not read all the comments . But as in every profession there are the good ones and the bad ones. I have a problem with patients who keep doubting us and questioning every single thing .After having painstakingly explained and worked upon who will only find flaws on our work and send us on a guilt trip at the billing counter ….As far as our work is concerned we r not god and its extremely difficult to simulate nature …we can only try to.
Nevertheless i feel this can be a lot lesser if every patient is given a fair picture about what hes gonna experience . This saves a lot issues later. Like I will make sure ill tell my patients things like hes gonna have gaps i n his teeth after scaling if his gums have already receded …it not me whos making those gaps , they were always there …we are only cleaning the deposits over the teeth…!!! For gods sake no one has such scalers which can actually trin teeth down!!! Or about post operative sensitivity. Post Rc pain for a few days …etc !!
So people have a heart please understand that we are humans trying to help you out.
This is so sad. I never thought that anyone would ever just not brush for days period, let alone before they went to go see the dentist. I really like my dentist. He’s kind of a grandfatherly figure, and shares an office with his son, who is also a dentist. The atmosphere is friendly. I suppose it helps that he complimented me on my clean and well kept teeth. I do brush religiously twice a day.
Ha-ha
Ha-ha, life sucks
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haha. i guess this is where all dentists and “dentist lovers” go when they are free
thank you very much.. even i could have never expressed myself as good as you did. here in turkey it never brings a car nowadays, but the rest is totally true
)
My dentist died of cancer. Now I have no dentist to go to
To patients out there, try me, you won’t regret… I am one of the few dentists who work with compassion….
What a cheap advertising ploy!
Love the article, very refreshing, not many of us “un- dentists” view dentists and doctors as being merley human. This list i’m sure could easliy fit into any career field. Thanks for sharing and giving me a different perspective.
Very interesting stuff, but I’m still not sure I understand the difference between TMJ and TMD?
Insightful blog and I found the list of your responses to patient behaviour amusing
As for the discussion… shame about the multitude of individuals who can’t get off their hobby-horses…
Also, rather ironic that a blog about patient/clinician love/hate relationships has attracted a bunch of egos that seem driven to drill the ‘lay’ person about incorrect terminology or a few spelling errors (sorry about the pun).
I am a dentist. Experienced and well qualified beyond the basic level that a GP has. Gaining the qualification you have is an unrelenting exercise but the concepts of dentistry and medicine you learn are not difficult – so stop looking down your nose at people and lose the arrogant attitudes.
Chances are that some of you aren’t quite as brite as you would like to think. Also likely is the fact that your patients don’t know how good your work is…just that they trust you or don’t trust you. For some of you that will be a benefit….as they won’t know how poor your work may be.
You are priviledged to be able to provide such a role for people. Show some grace, and understand that your patients are not by implication, necessarily priveledged to receive your care.
Love this! Thanks
Hi. Thanks for such an interesting post
Although I have to say, as a second year dental student, this has made me a little bit apprehensive now, lol. I’ve only worked on extracted teeth so far. Hopefully I’d have a better experience with my patients when the time comes. Have a pleasant day
EVERY part of this is true! Loved it! Hopefully, pts will see this and think twice before they sit in our chairs!
Wonderful! it is worth framing and putting up in a dentist’s office.
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“my tooth didn’t hurt before you worked on it.” <<that's what make me crazy
You have like a hundred million comments here but I just had to get in my two bits worth!
Loved the write up and I shared it with my dentist who loved it.
What a fab insight. I have a lovely dentist and she actually put the fear of dentists out of me and the kids too! We love going to see her. Enough respect to your (sometimes) thankless efforts.
I will never ever ever tell anyone ever again that the fancy car that they drive is because of me….
Ah When I think about how afraid I get when I think that I’ve stopped visiting the dentist and that I damn need one.I’m a medical student and have nothing against dentistry but definitely have a tooth against my dentists.They definitely solve my troubles but I hat it when they say”Owww u love candies” with a sarcastic grin!
Yes I’m a glutton and I never denied it,but no need to make me further depressed ;So sweet of u to remind me who i am !!!
I have definite grudges with all my dentists(well I only had 2 of them in my 20 yrs of life)
Everyone can say something about this, and certainly there are many money suckers out there.. I’m a 4th year dental student, I know the feeling. We are no god, we simply read a lot, failed a lot, until we are able to do the right thing in one appointment. It’s not easy, we through some hectic years in dental school, things many outsiders can’t imagine. You tell me, 32 teeth is easy, why don’t you whiners try it out? yeah go through those mind blowing years, see if you can still sit in your freaking couch and rant about dentist. Respect, please. I respect you, you should show me some too.
i like u post hahaha
1. All the fillings on my front teeth that my previous dentist did break and come out. It doesn’t matter that I chronically smoke which drys my mouth out and causes decay under fillings. It doesn’t matter that I have huge fillings that my dentist recommended crowns on 5 years ago. It doesn’t matter that I don’t have back teeth to chew on and that I’m putting all the force on my front teeth causing my fillings to break.
2. I hate my previous dentist. He sent me to a specialist to get a root canal, which I got. He told me to crown the tooth so it wouldn’t break, but I waited 5 years and now it’s broken. It’s his fault it broke.
3. I have to pay $25 for not showing up for my appointment? That’s crazy! I never get charged for not showing up to my medical doctor for an appointment. You guys are just trying to make money. I don’t care if your hygienist makes $35-50/hour, I shouldn’t have to pay her for her time if I don’t show up for my appointment. You are so greedy. Oh, and I just paid for your new house.
4. You want to charge my Dad $1000 for a denture? What, you just want to pay off your student loans quick, huh? This is the last time I’ll be coming to you! His last dentist only charged him $500 for his denture in 1970.
5. I’m a Medicaid patient and I’m entitled to free dental work. So what if I drive a BMW, my kids have Air Jordan’s and iPhones, and that all my clothes come from Nordstrom? I’m entitled because the state says I can get free dental care. I know how to work the system. I just keep having kids and don’t work and they state gives me free health and dental care. Isn’t America great?!
6. My family is really getting sick of the progress we’re making. All the work you are doing is failing. So what if I have severe acid reflux, smoke chronically, and spend the night vomiting? It’s your fault and they want results. So what if I only come in for emergency appointments? I can’t afford my dental treatment. Oh, where I have I been? Well, I just got back from a deer hunting trip in Illinois. It wasn’t too expensive, $5000. I can’t spend my money where I want. The real question is why are my teeth failing?
7. You guys are too expensive, I’m leaving your practice. You are so greedy and your quality of work sucks says the patient who never comes to the dentist more than once a year for emergency visits.
Love the snappy remark about the patient paying for a portion of your student loan vs. a brand new car. So, I’m curious, what career did you transition to? You must be thrilled to only be responsible for your own mouth from now on. I’m a massage therapist and experience the flip side of the dental profession. Clients look forward to seeing me for weeks.
Thanks for this article.It has opened my eyes to the “other side” of going to the dentist.It is mostly my anxiety that makes me do some of these things,but with a little nitrous oxide,I am much better and therefore making it easier to let the dentist work on me.
I am a dental assistant and I agree and understand her frustration absolutely
Here’s a real-world example of what we deal with. I had a patient in yesterday, whom I had never seen before, to recement a crown. When I looked at the tooth and crown, he had broken the remaining tooth structure, which was severely decayed, when the crown came off, so all that was left were two decayed roots, well below the gumline. There is no way to fix that.
When my assistant brought him back to the chair, he told her that he hadn’t been to the dentist in years, ever since his last dentist told him he needed a lot of work. He said, “I told him I could have a lot of fun with that money, and I would spend it on that instead of dental work”. Fast forward however many years later, and now I get to tell him he needs three completely nonsalvageable teeth extracted, at least one filling, and periodontal treatment. When he asked how he was going to chew, I explained that his options were implants or a partial denture. When I told him the approximate costs involved with each option, he got upset. He told me he would have to think about it, and even refused a referral to an oral surgeon to have the infected, nonsalvageable teeth extracted.
Now, I feel bad that he can’t afford the treatment he needs. But his own words made it clear that years ago, he COULD have afforded it, but chose not to. I can’t do anything to help the fact that neglecting problems now leads to bigger, tougher-to-solve, more expensive problems down the road. If you decide it’s too expensive to change the oil in your car, don’t get upset with your mechanic when he tells you it’s going to take a lot of money to fix it.
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I am a dental assistant and think that this is BRILLIANT! SO true, so funny, and I literally laughed out loud at home by myself
Well done!
As a dentist, I think we all agree on all points of your post. One thing though, despite everything, I actually still love my job, and I can’t think of another job that would fit me better. Yes, patients can be rude, but they can also be nice and thankful. When my patients tell me I have golden hands, or when they say the anaesthetic didn’t hurt at all, when they give me chocolate/flowers/small gifts, I feel happy. I think that counts too!
xo,
a dentist in the Netherlands.
Absolutely it counts. I have a patient who bakes pies for us, many who bring us chocolates or gift cards. And the vast majority of patients are wonderful people. I like getting to see them – our visits are seldom just exams and fillings. They’re chatting/social time, too, which makes for a pleasant day.
I made something like this for the store I’m working at…while going to dental hygiene school
If you think about how much money us greedy dentists make think of the billiions insurance companies make in profits. These are just three publicly traded companies. Humana 6.1 billion metlife 6.3 billion united health group 23 billion. There are many more.
On this same note…..when a patient complains about the last dentist, and how horrible it was that it made them stay away for many years before going back……use this analogy…”If you went to a bad restaurant and didn’t like the food, would you stay away from ever eating at another restaurant?” Patients do not need to group all dentists together in one pot. Nor, do we as dentists need to group our patients in one pot either. We chose this profession to make a difference in our lives and the lives of our patients. Although, the blog that this started was too funny! And to Ms. Suggestsmagic, I am sorry that you are so unhappy and cynical in life. Some of your negative attitude can definitely be affecting your entire health and wellness. For instance, one of the first part of our bodies to feel stress would be our TM Joint, causing muscle tension headaches and pain. Something to think about. May you lighten up and find happiness in life.
DLB, I suggest a different approach. Almost every patient is a recycled one looking for a place that will provide what they haven’t gotten in the past. If you listen closely, patients will tell you what sent them away and how they wish to be treated. It’s how you respond that will make all the difference. Responding with something as simple as “Mrs. Jones, I’m sorry you had that experience. We will do everything we can to make sure that doesn’t happen here. What would you like to be different this time around?” can start you off on a long and successful relationship.
90% of dentist do are incompetent doing really bad works. I work with them and I see all the days.
they dont want to lissen , so never can learn because they think his work is the best…
the people dont know when is right your work.
I can extend more but is going to be the same because 90% nerver lissen
Im so sorry but is the work that I see every single day
so congratulation for the other 10% of dentist that are really profesional
If we’re that bad, why do you stay in the field? Must be frustrating.
Do you mind revealing what type of “dental professional” you are? Are you in an actual position to judge the dentist’s work? Not all positions in the dental field are clinical in nature. Do you have the training to recognize good vs. bad work? On how many dentist’s are you basing this opinion?
Or are you a troll?
I love my dentist. Not only has he helped me to get over a life-long fear of going to the dentist with his gentle treatment, concise explanations, and pleasant office and staff, but he has personally shown me great generosity and compassion by working with me to get bills paid since I have no dental insurance. I will be grateful forever to this kind and wonderful man. And, to top it off, he does beautiful work!
your car …. of course is for your hard work but the law said you must show to the patient the cost of all the treatment , who do that?
….
Well, your list has made it to us lowly NHS dentists over the pond.
loved the list but cant put it on my Fb page because I have a few years left before I can bail out.
I admit to being slightly scared about putting any comments on here, in case I have all the grammar fetishists waving their pitchforks and torches at me but hey ho.
Cant say I am happy about the whole TMJ/TMD superiority thing but…
Speaking as a member of the british profession that appeared on The Simpsons as a horror book (‘Bumper book of British Dentristry’anyone?) I sympathise wholeheartedly with all my colleages here. We generally dont have the huge debts that you guys do but #8 is often spouted by the patient who is having the emergency extraction for £17 or the 10 restorations for £47 or even, horror of horrors, the 1 to however many they need crown/dentures for £200.
Aaah 2 hour appointments, 45 minute examinations that sounds loooooovely. *sigh*
Keep smilin and dont let the buggers grind u down
yes I didnt used the the apostrophes , but is just a opinion that you cant respect , probably u are one of them because hurt you.
Xx
and I sed that THERE ARE GOOD DENTIST ASWELL.
I have to learn the apostrophes but u habe to learn to respect the people and possibly about u work
Wow! Interesting rants going on there!!! As a dentist, I understand all the dental angst out there, I’ve been through it. Fortunately, as a military dentist, my patients are generally well behaved, becase you know what? They understand that we are there to help them. They sit down, take their treatment, give a ‘thank you ma’am,’ and of they go. We are mostly unthanked in our profession, but at least the military, who understand we are on THEIR side, thank us. Perhaps the civilian population could take note. When you have bombs and bullets coming your way from the bad guys who actually want to kill you, then a short sharp ouch as an anaesthetic neeedle goes in that ultimately leads to us saving you from further suffering is not actually that bad. GET SOME PERSPECTIVE PEOPLE!!!
Wow Lolabees~ thank you for your interesting article~ you speak out for us.
greetings from Malaysia~：））
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Many of the points you made are PART of the reason why I decided to specialize in OMFP… my microscope loves me! Actually, I have plenty of stories from my 3 years as a general dentist of very appreciative, willing, helpful patients… but there were just too many days I had to encounter a patient plunking down in my chair, heaving a big sigh, and saying “I HATE the dentist!” I haven’t practiced clinical dentistry for 9 years now, but funny story from the other day… I got to talking with someone while we were in line waiting for something, she found out I’m a dentist, and said she had horrible experiences as a child. Of course I’m thinking “Well, here we go, I can’t mention that I’m a dentist without hearing all about everyone’s horrible dental experiences…” She proceeds to tell me that “Dentists used to be so horrible, making you wear that awful rubber thing. Thank goodness they don’t do that anymore.” The look of horror on her face when I told her that rubber dams in fact ARE still used, especially for certain technique-sensitive procedures that won’t work without moisture control… the whole explanation was lost on her. I was once again reminded why I love my microscope.
lolabees,
Your blogpost is spot-on. As the husband of a dentist, I get to hear about the god-awful things said to my wonderful dentist everyday. I’d like to think that most people are not malicious (just ignorant…) towards dentistry, but there are days where it is hard to keep that optimistic outlook.
I’ve suggested my wife say the following to her patients – “You know what, caries hurt, drilling makes noise, the pain you feel now is MUCH better than the pain you would have felt had you not sought professional service, and the discomfort you feel afterwards is not nearly the discomfort of gumming your food. You haven’t put my kids through college, paid for my vacation, bought me a new car, or purchased my house. Based upon the choices I’ve made in life, I have – the same as you. I bet you would not say something so rude to your family doctor or any other person who provides professional service to you and your family. If you actually hate me, then I suggest you go elsewhere. Or shut up, open your mouth, and let me do a good job on your rotting, plaque-infested teeth!”
But, she is much too professional and compasionate to say all that directly to her patients. Thank you for saying it for her
I’d like to know how you got out of the dental profession. It’s not like dental skills crossover into many other kinds of jobs. I enjoy what I do but sometimes I feel like it’s a bit of a dead end.
Do you think that all people only have one set of skills? There are many people who switch careers after many years in another careeer. I know pilots who have become dentists or physicians. I know a pharmacist who became a vet. I know an OB/GYN who became a dentist (yes, he traded one opening for another). I know engineers who became dentists. ETC. ETC. ETC. I am in the middle of my 2nd career (3rd career if you count the 5 years I was a professional snow skier). I started my first 13 years in the military before becoming a dentist.
Before I became a dentist, I did many things: I was a ski lift operator, I was a professional musician (have a B. of Music degree besides all of the science), I taught piano lessons… there are also many, many things I’m interested in as well, that I would like to learn in the future. I am in the military now, but once I retire from the military, I very well may pursue other career paths and challenges besides my dental specialty. If you are a dentist, I hope you have some hobbies at least, but if not, if dentistry is the only thing you have in your life, besides clinical dentistry you could teach, you could go into public health, you could become a healthcare administrator… not a dead end to me.
About the 10 reasons… We have the same problems here in Chile hahaha!!. We understand your issues hahahahaha!
Best Regards from Chile
I love Chile! Thanks!
Some great comments here although I did not have time to read through all of them. Here’s my 2 cents worth. Over the years I have observed dentistry as a profession decline. What was once a highly respected health profession has now become a business more than anything else. So many dentists have reinvented themselves as “Cosmetic Dentists” or “Implant Dentists” or “Children’s Dentists” or “Wholistic Dentists”, and so on, in order to compete with each other or to attract certain types of patients in this modern age where dental needs are decreasing. What used to be termed “patients” are now “clients”, “clinic” or “surgery” is now “centre” or “institute”, and “treatments” are now “services”. Dental clinics now advertise on TV, radio, glossy magazines and have fancy websites with models who have obviously been downloaded from istock. No wonder much of the medical profession and general public do not respect dentists.
Much of what you said is true. Slick advertising and aggressive sales techniques do seem to have increased, and I don’t think they always reflect positively on us.
But offices geared toward a particular group of patients are largely in existence because there is a need or perceived need for them. I don’t know what I’d do without my favorite pediatric dentist to refer to. Some kids are just unable to cooperate with the dentist in a general practice setting, or have such extensive needs that they need specialty treatment, under sedation or general anesthesia. Pediatric dentistry, BTW, is not a marketing ploy, but a legitimate specialty. Cosmetic dentists exist because emphasis on physical perfection is much greater now than it was years ago, and we now have materials and methods to deliver a perfect-looking smile. Many dentists I know, myself included, are not interested in focusing on cosmetic dentistry, and I have no problem with patients going to a dentist who does, if they want cosmetic dentistry. As for holistic dentists, there will always be patients who believe mainstream treatment methods do more harm than good, and they will be more comfortable in a holistic office. Whether the dentists themselves truly believe in their methods, or they’re just using “holistic” labels to gain patients, I don’t know.
“Decline” was not the appropriate word for me to use. I should have used “change” instead. I don’t know whether “specialty” practices exist because of actual need, perceived need, desire, or economy. However I do agree that specialist practices are a necessity. My wife is a specialist pediatric dentist and I don’t know what I would do without her (I am hopeless at treating children). I am not judging what dentists do to satisfy their own or the public’s need/desire. It’s just an observation on where the profession seems to be heading.
Dentistry Forever, just think about the way dentists are reflected in modern culture and movies! Where does that come from? It’s the way some patients are treated. It is my opinion that dentists have the enormous responsibility of changing the public’s perception of the profession. I agree that there is some dental advertising that does not reflect favorably but Dentists, like every “business” must compete in an increasingly difficult economy and part of that is distinguishing themselves apart from their colleagues. One way in which they can change perception is through the external messages they send into the marketplace and their goodwill in the community. It must be authentic and true to the dentist and their beliefs without being manipulative.
This is so true, I’m a hygienist and when people who don’t brush and or floss complain about me “hurting” them, I want to just scream “you came to me for a service, to clean your teeth! If you don’t take care of them its not my fault it hurts! either let me do my job or get out of my chair!” Its like they think we know some super secret way not to hurt them but we are just holding back b/c we like to see people in pain. I have plenty of patients who floss everyday who LOVE coming to get their teeth cleaned!
I love this!!!
this article sure seems like it was written by a cry baby. any dentist who likes this article must know that he/she chose the job and to bitch/whine about the hurdles that come along with that job, is pretty juvenile. in short, if any dentist hates his/ her patients, two suggestion for that: 1- change the job, 2- keep in mind these patients pay you bills!!! without them your nothing!!
First of all, this article is a response to another list of ‘why I hate dentists’. So it’s not exactly whining, it’s sharing perspectives.
Besides, I could say the same about some patients as well: Anyone who visits the dentist must know that he/she chose to go to one and to bitch/whine about the hurdles that comes along with the treatment is pretty juvenile. In short, if any patient hates his/her dentist, two suggestions for that: 1- simply change to another dentist. 2- keep in mind that without those dentists, you’d still have to suffer the pain of your toothache or whatever it is that ails you. Or, if you’re one of those people who had already set in mind that all dentists are evil, the solution is simple – don’t ever visit the dentist.
I don’t hate the dentist, for me its the anticipation. My dentist is a lovely lady who is so calm and reassuring. I’ve realised its not the dentist I dislike, its the drill. As soon as I hear it I tense up. My dentist does a great job of calming me and reassuring me. Abd when she is done I wonder what all the fuss was about. Yes some people have had bad experiences, I have had them with my previous dentist. But ive had bad experiences in the garage, in shops in loads of places. Doesn’t mean I stop going to them all. I’ve very happy with my current dentist, after all, she is providing a service, doing her job. It’s not her fault if I need a filling.
Sooooooooooo true,I stopped working as a dentist after just working for few months for all the reasons above and much more.It is a really stressful job
I actually quite like my dentist. Going to sit in a very fancy surgery, getting my teeth checked out by a lovely, polite and friendly dentist and then being chided if I’ve not been following her advice. At the end I’m given a bill which is pretty reasonable considering the running costs of the surgery, the equipment and the level of training required.
All this and a sticker if I’m brave!
No wonder Dentists have one of the highest suicide rates among professions. FACT!
Well, I have had some terrible dentists but thank you for making me see what it could be like in their shoes. I can’t believe some people don’t brush before going. Also….. It is really hard for me to afford getting work done though a lot of the time, so I do end up waiting.
@suggestsmagic u should physiologically develop a brain before teeth….apparently this was not the case. Thank u 2cents by reinforcing my statement. suggestsmagic you are just another daddy’s issued girl with a lot of free time in hands…try and study to be….i dunno…maybe a dentist ? Idiot remarks make idot responses.
The true!!!!
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Great post ! View from the other side of the mouth. Keep sharing!!
right
Thought this would be more funny, less bitchy. I feel more nervous about going to the dentist NOW after reading this wondering how they REALLY think and how disgusted they are about being in my less than perfect mouth. :/ Hope it was good to get it off your chest… (Now if I could only delete it from my ‘brain’s cache’…)
Nah, don’t sweat it, Tammi. The list is not about most patients. I’m just showing the extreme of what we can see. We really are a very understanding bunch!
Greetings to all and Happy Holidays,
I feel bad for the OP who leaves this wonderful profession as there are thousands of applicants failed to gain dental school admission each year with shattered hopes.
In every field in all walks of life, there are “bad” patients, clients, costumers and the worst thing a person can do is to let this small group of people ruined his/her career. In the majority of the case, these behaviors unfortunately are through ignorance, naive or bad dental experience in the past that somehow became a learned perception and that leads to unhealthy behavior. And this behavior can be changed by the provider willing to take the time to undo this learned process. Taking the effort to advise, inform the patient and not letting your emotion to get the best you, you WILL disrupt the unhealthy destructive thinking and replace it with an informed and healthy one. All the things you had said in the article I have experienced firsthand myself and with very rare exception, I was able to convert from highly misinformed to wonderful and pleasant patients. My motto is “An informed patient is a good patient”. If that person understands why certain procedures are recommended and why such fee is associated with that particular procedure, then he/she likely will not question your assessment. A long time ago when I had my faculty practice, I was once asked on why mine is almost doubling her general dentist’s fee? I sat down at length and discussed on the reasons for her referral and once she understands on how my expertise can give her the best chance of success, she no longer questioned any cost associated with my proposed treatment plan. I did not go into details of my student loans or my overhead cost because these things are irrelevant in patient care. The only thing that matters is what you can do for your patients. And this is where our focus should be as a health care provider. What important in this particular case is what I can do for her and the rest is history.
After amassed huge school student loan and had spent 16 years from my first day in college, I often in the past asked myself if I made the right choice of being the dentist. I must say absolutely that it was the best decision of my life and to let others know the wonderful blessing that I have now, I became an avid mentor for students seeking career in dentistry. You can read more about me on the link below and I will be more than happy to answer any questions anyone may have.
http://studentdoctor.net/2007/08/another-face-of-dentistry-an-interview-with-dr-dai-chinh-phan-dds-ms-maxillofacial-prosthodontics/
I ask the OP to reconsider her departure from dentistry as her skill is too valuable to let it go to waste. If I can be of any help to anyone, please feel free to let me know. Happy Holidays everyone! DP
Tammi… like Lola says we’re really a pretty good bunch of people overall. The only way you’ll run into a hard time is if you manifest your nervousness as rudeness or disrespect. Be honest and humble… and respect the fact that we’re professionals who do this for a living and you’re only the 10,000th person to sit in that chair. That’s the best advice I can give anyone.
And honestly… as long as you pay your bill and don’t give me or my staff a hard time… I could care less how perfect your mouth is. The more imperfect it is the more of a challenge it is to fix. We like that
Well said, Coach. Thanks!
Tammi,
Most of us don’t have perfect mouths, either. Most dentists have had some cavities, some (like me) have crowns, and some are even missing teeth. Shocked? We’re human, too. I don’t know any dentist who judges a person for not having perfect teeth – it’s the patients who look like they threw away the toothbrush we gave them at their last visit without ever using it that we judge. As long as you’re polite, pay your bill, and don’t rub snuff and leave that for me to pick out (happens more than you’d think), I’ve got no problem with you.
Not sure what is more amazing here… The fact this great post got you 778 comments (as I type this one) or that you take the time to respond to most of them. It’s a full-time job.
Anyways, I saw your post on the WordPress “Recently Posted” section, jumped over and read a couple posts. You are a very good writer, and you hair looks better that little bit shorter and “cleaned up”.
Cheers.
Thanks, Urban Daddy! Yeah, I tried, and luckily I wasn’t working for a few days b/c of the career change! Eventually I couldn’t keep up, but was interested in the dialogue (obviously,) so I had to jump in at times. Had to reply to you, though! Thanks for joining in the fun!
OMG! This is sooooooo true! I deal with this everyday! It’s a very good compilation of the dentist’s problems!
Lolabees,
Your story is inspiring! Would you mind telling me what are you doing know, after leaving your career as a dentist? Have you already found an occupation which is right for you?
Good list. I laughed, and I felt bad for all dentists. I try to respect mine often and always thank him after fixing anything that caused me pain. Enjoy not being a dentist…I think.
“Why is this bill so large? do you have to make car payment.” asks patient. I usually answe “no, the car is paid for, it is for my staff to have food on their table.”
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May I link your blog to my blog, please?
Absolutely. Thanks for asking!
@ lolabees: The reason you got jumped was because you were insulting and disrepactfull. You do not call an entire profession “greedy bastards”, you stupid bitch (yeah I said it). Do we make good money? Sure we do. However, remember that we spend lot of time in school and have ton load of student loans. I am not saying we deserve the money we make. However, who does? Does the professional players, CEO’s deserve it? Do you call them “greedy bastards”? Now shut up and get a life
DDS MSD– pay a little more attention please. I did not get jumped or say any of the things you are implying. I’m the author of the post and felt nasty comments like this one were ruining the spirit of my post.
Thanks again for having the courage to put this out there AND all the entertaining and valuable comments!
I’ve posted a new writing based on this Blog and discussion thread. It looks at these issues from a behavioral perspective. If you care to read, here’s the link:
http://prosynergyblog.wordpress.com/
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Cited from http://www.nidcr.nih.gov/OralHealth/Topics/TMJ/TMJDisorders.htm
“Temporomandibular joint and muscle disorders, commonly called “TMJ,” are a group of conditions that cause pain and dysfunction in the jaw joint and the muscles that control jaw movement.”
As a hygienist of 12 years, this post literally made me laugh out loud! Who doesn’t need that every once in a while? I think I have actually replied to the comment, ” I hate the dentist,” with this, ” I could retire if I had a dollar for every time that I heard that.”
I do believe that most of us in the dental profession went into the profession to help people and because we like people. That being said, it is disheartening when you hear these things on a daily basis. I realize that people have baggage and bad experiences but why do we as dental professionals get called irresponsible when we vent in response to an article that was written.
Respect is a two way street. Unfortunately, In our society today, there are way too many people that do not respect each other which is obvious with all the bantering back and forth. I am amazed at the immaturity of some of the comments not only by lay people but dental professionals as well.
At the end of the day, I really enjoy the patients that I’ve grown to respect and love over the past 12 years. The few, that are grateful and appreciative of what we do to help them, make it all worthwhile. However, it is no secret that these comments are mind numbing and get to most of us in the profession on some days.
I think by making your comments accessible to the public that there will surely be people that learn from this. I hope there will be patients that realize that everyone wants to feel appreciated whether you are a dentist or an employee working at the McDonald’s drive thru.
Good luck and blessings to you all in whatever career you choose. May we all find happiness in our choices.
Thank you for your thoughtful reply. Very well said!
I am a home health aide and the services I provide are as necessary to some as dental care. I can make $20 an hour if I am lucky. I don’t have much sympathy for a dentist who whines about badly behaved patients because I know I put up with as much if not more, for far fewer financial rewards. Everyone needs dental care but in most communities there isn’t a low cost, sliding scale alternative for low income patients. An individual may forgo dental care until they have an emergency, and then be subjected to a humiliating experience because they “didn’t take care of their teeth.” I think that the writer of this blog show a remarkable lack of sensitivity to the realities of life during this economic downturn.
Wow! Talk about someone not being happy in their job!
I don’t understand how so many people cannot get this in the playfulness it was offered?! Lolabees was not “whining” or “complaining”, she was just talking about less than the 1% of patients that are like this and they may not even realize this is how they come across. What s wrong with having a frank discussion about something that can bring about a positive change in this world while at the same time, poking a bit of fun at ourselves?
Not only was she being funny about how we all act at times, she is talking about a career that she thought she would like, but found out it is not a good fit for her and she decided to make a change that makes her happy. If more people had the strength to admit they do not love what they do and make a career change, maybe there would be less unhappy people in the world!
I admire your courage and strength lolabees and I find the humor in your postings~
Melanie, you hit the nail right on the head! Thanks for getting it, and thanks for the positive encouragement! You show a lot of empathy… something the world needs
Thank you, thank you, thank you! Oh, and you have a great sense of humor, btw 
My pleasure!!
I wish you were still practicing and I lived close, I would love to be your assistant!!
You just keep being true to yourself and let the negative comments roll off your back! I look forward to hearing more about what your next adventure is
Wishing you much success!
I am surprised you call the experience ‘humiliating’. I am certain I just focus on the job of fixing patients’ teeth. Some patients act sheepish for ‘having not seen a dentist for a long time’, but I have never felt it was a matter to judge the patients for, because I realize there are other circumstances in one’s life that need to be prioritized before dental care. Nor do I feel any reason to judge them when they say they are short of money, because my own parents came from poverty-stricken families who could not even afford to buy shoes for the children.
However, I do judge a person who complains that $120 (Australian) for a filling is too expensive and then buy bottles of soft drinks at the supermarket during her weekly grocery shopping. (I work in a small town; often see patients outside surgery). One bottle costs $2. She buys 5 or more bottles each week. How much money does she spend on soft drinks each year? How much healthier would her and her family’s teeth be if they cut out soft drinks. My parents’ families were so poor that they were happy if they just had enough to eat. Before I became a dentist 8 years ago, they had only been to the dentist twice in their lives. Yet the first time I gave them a check-up, I did not find even one carious lesion (decay) and their gum conditions were good.
I also judge parents who have 10 children but have failed to keep the younger ones dentally healthy and yet could not afford the treatments. I saw all 10 children. The oldest 3 had good teeth. The 4th one had 2 carious lesions. The 5th one had 4. The younger the child, the worse its teeth became. Every single tooth of the youngest one (2years old) was grossly carious and needed to be removed. The parents complained that dental treatments were too expensive, when they should have realized before they decided to have so many kids that more children mean more cost, more chaos, and more work. I cannot stop myself from judging the parents. I feel sorry for the children who are neglected due to their own parents’ lacking sense of responsibility.
None of these two examples have anything to do with how much I earn myself. These people complain that their teeth are bad because they cannot afford the expensive dental treatments and they make dentists the scapegoat for their demise simply because we earn more. But the real causes are their skewed priorities, their irresponsibility, and their lack of self-discipline and self-control.
Wow! My receptionist just gave me a copy of this post…let me say, AMEN AMEN AMEN! I felt as if someone had tapped into my everyday thoughts:)
Thanks, doc!
lolabees!!! You sound like a damn child for even making this retarded blog……. Your how old? If you had that many complaints with the people you worked on maybe you should look at yourself and not the other people….. (Just a thought) Maybe with how much you disliked being a dentist you provided bad service and then got offended when people complained…I’m sorry but If I see a dentist who is a complete asshole to me for no reason and is rough on my mouth then no I dont want to pay them I dont feel I should pay someone my hard earned money to fix my tooth and treat me like shit on top of it…. Not saying all dentist are like that but Ive dealt with plenty of them and you lolabees sound just like them. Naive and uncaring of your patients probably a good thing you are getting out of it… We need people in the dentistry who really care about people and what they need…. We pay You to help us not to deal with your anger issues or whatever else you got going on, same concept If i pay someone to cook my food and its not the way I order then they need to fix it, same with getting my hair done if they dont take time to listen and do it wrong why should I pay for that!!! same with alot of things in this world… bottom line we pay you to help not be mean rude and just straight up rough…
This is outrageous. Comparing the medical care you receive from a dentist is NOTHING like ordering a meal or getting your hair cut. Neither of those things affects your health in the same way proper dental care does. When you go to a dentist, it is not a smorgasbord from which you can select. This is a medical professional who will care for you in professional manner, in your best interest.
Would you complain if your hairdresser didn’t cut your hair the way you wanted, if you were moving your head all over the place while she was working? Is a bad result their fault, or yours? That’s what dentists are dealing with, but in a much more confined space, and with sometimes irreversible consequences if the patient bites down on the handpiece while it’s spinning.
Lolabees’ former patients and colleagues have posted on this forum, and they think she’s a great dentist. You’ve never met her, and are assuming that she is uncaring. She’s not asking anyone to fix her anger issues (pot, meet kettle), just asking patients not to make it unnecessarily difficult to fix their dental issues, and to pay their bills the same as they do for any other service they receive.
Wow… You sound like such an arrogant person.
“We pay You to help us not to deal with your anger issues or whatever else you got going on,” Wait, what? Did your dentist ever ask you to deal with his “anger issues”? I doubt it. Dentists are people and people complain. What makes you think that your hairdresser isn’t talking about you behind your back? Just about everyone talks about their work problems to let off the steam. Every cook and salesperson and all have a certain type of customers they dread having. Just because this author made her complaints public doesn’t mean the rest didn’t complain. You just didn’t happen to stumble upon them.
And like Sandra Drake said, if you move your head around when the hairdresser is doing your hair, whose fault is it that the result is less than satisfactory? If you want a good service anywhere, you’d have to cooperate, be it with a dentist, hairdresser, cook, makeup artist etc.
And you know what they say, “treat other people how you want to be treated”. If you treat someone with respect, they’ll respect you back. And if you’re being an asshole, the other person might return the favor.
Get a life!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! …and a sense of humor!
Hello Lolabee
Word Press Red Hot issues; Politics, religion and now dentistry! Makes me laugh I would have never guessed dentistry was in the red hot issues. I enjoyed your blog, your authentic, honest and delightfully transparent ahh so refreshing.
GOD bless you and your family two and four-legged!
Two levels of commentary here:
I do see you point on all of those and some of that I can sympathize on. The X-ray thing has gotten worse, though–I never had any trouble biting down with my pre-Katrina dentist. I think it’s something in the way the film is constructed now–it used to hurt when it dug it (and I dealt with it) but now it hurts AND my gag reflex stays in. It literally takes at least three people to do my X-rays now. I wouldn’t hold it against you as a person…exactly.
And in defense of more nervous/anxious patients, 1, 6 and 8 might just be a perversely humorous way to break the tension and try to maintain some inner calm. I always ragged on my two previous dentists for humming while they were seemingly digging for uranium in my mouth. Neither took it personally.
And since I mentioned that….it is SOOOOO NOT. THAT. SERIOUS. Did I really scroll through that many supposed “adults” catfighting and nitpicking over a blog post with shades of truth AND humor in it? I’ve seen kindergarteners argue with more tact. If you disagree, that’s your right, but what good is the verbal attack going to do but make you look more stupider? (And yes, I realize that “stupider” is not a word and if it were, “more stupider” would make it redundant–however, that is the only applicable description for some of the infantile exchanges I read through…and ultimately past, as I heard brain cells committing suicide from the jackassery displayed.)
Anywho, great read, Lolabees….and I applaud your patience.
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10 Reasons Your Dentist Probably Hates You Too
1. The first thing you say when you sit down in my chair is, “I hate the dentist.” Really?!? Did your parents teach you any manners? Did they ever teach you that it is impolite to tell someone you hate them the moment you greet them? What I really want to say back is, “aww, I hate you too.”
(Its not like real hating, sometimes it’s just for opening a conversation…would it be better to break ice by using questions like: how’s the teeth market those coupla days? Whats the expected average growth of teeth for 2012? So whats your target for teeth pulling this year? Do you know that we hate hairdressers more, but there’s one good thing about them… THEY TALK so you don’t feel time)
2. You come to your appointment, and it’s obvious you haven’t brushed your teeth in days. I’ve had some people with great hygiene come in and apologize because they’ve just eaten lunch and couldn’t brush. This is not what I’m talking about. I mean food and thick plaque everywhere. After 10 years of seeing blood and rotten teeth and some really nasty things, this is still the 1 thing that makes me dry heave. You know when you come to us that we have to be in your mouth. Would you clean your home before having company? Additionally, I have spent hours literally bending over backwards repairing your teeth. Could you at least pretend that you are caring for the work that I have struggled to complete for you?
(OMG!!!! If a dentist says so, what’s left for the gynecologist or urologist? I hope it’s more personal and confidential…)
3. After we have spent hours of meticulously repairing your teeth, you complain about the bill. Would you walk out of the grocery store with a bag full of groceries and expect not to pay? I’ve just helped you to continue to smile and eat comfortably, two pretty valuable things that help your quality of life.
(Well There gotta be a golden apple somewhere in this grocery bag that I am paying that much for!)
4. I tell you that you have a cavity and you need a filling, and you wait months or even years to get the necessary work done. Eventually the tooth starts hurting. Two weeks of pain go by, and you call me on a Saturday night while I am at dinner with friends because your tooth that needed a filling a year ago and that started hurting 2 weeks ago is suddenly an emergency.
(YESSSS I finally won the Lottery on Saturday…and the first one to share me the prize is you….BE HAPPY !! )
5. You come to me so I can help you, but you make it hard for me to do a good job. You wince and make faces when it’s not hurting. The idea that I’m hurting you makes me just as uncomfortable and stressed as you are. If it hurts, please tell me, and I can help you with that. But if it’s because you don’t like the whole experience, you are only causing me to work in undesirable conditions, making it harder to do my best. And when you push your tongue in the way, or you don’t open wide enough, it makes it physically impossible to get my work done. Don’t you want it to be easy for me to do the best job for you?
(How about if you make sure that your da** mini vacuum cleaner isn’t sucking my tongue out while you think I am complaining for being in pain or frightened by your mean little drilling machine noise?)
6. You call and say, “my tooth didn’t hurt before you worked on it.” You came to me with a cavity. I did not put it there. You did. I am simply fixing a rotten hole that was in your tooth. To do so, I must use a tiny drill to cut the rot out of your tooth. If I took a drill, cut a hole in your femur bone, and then filled it in with a foreign material, don’t you think it might be sore for a while? Same concept.
(I’ll leave that for people who had to cut their same rots more than once because someone thought that he/she removed it perfectly before.)
7. When we try to take an x-ray, you won’t bite down on it. We have to do this to see what is going on with your tooth. Without knowing the problem, we can’t properly treat you. I know, in some cases some people really can’t do it; but some people could and won’t just suck it up for 15 seconds. I’ve had x-rays too, and they hurt and dig into my gums, but I just do it.
(Just stick that useless numbing needle you have in my cheek before dissecting me and I promise I won’t complain)
8. You tell me that you bought my car for me after having a crown done. Contrary to how it seems, you actually didn’t buy me a car. You bought yourself a crown. I have spent hundreds of thousands of dollars on an education, and have spent hours making this crown fit precisely in your mouth, so maybe you helped me make a portion of a student loan payment. But you certainly didn’t buy my car.
(Well yeah it’s a valid point, so it’s me and my friends who covered your tuition and a 50% down payment of your car.)
9. You no-show an appointment or cancel last-minute. Some things are unavoidable, but when it’s because your hairdresser got a last-minute cancellation and you had to take that appointment instead, this is just rude. Not only am I unable to fill the 2 hours of my schedule that I reserved specifically for you, but someone else who wanted to get in had to wait 2 weeks for his/her appointment. And on that note, when you have the first appointment of the day, and you show up late for your appointment, I am late for every other patient the rest of the day.
(I mean I am late as well because someone did the same thing to me while I was working through the day to earn enough money to pay your tuition fees and down payment on you car)
10. When I tell you that you grind your teeth, you deny it, as if I am accusing you of having a horrible disease or being a baby murderer. It’s not that bad to be a tooth grinder. I’m just pointing something out and maybe offering a way to prevent more problems in the future. This observation is concluded from signs or symptoms that are based on real science, not myth.
(Sorry about that, I am gonna record my sleep habits and see… Would you like me to video tape it too so we can hear and see whose right ?)
And along those lines… bonus #11. You tell me a diagnosis I make is simply wrong without listening to me. If you know so much, why are you coming to me? You do the filling or root canal yourself. You obviously don’t need me.
(How the hell will I be able to tell you that I hate you if I didn’t come ??!)
Aaahhh… I feel much better now.
If this isn’t you, I am sure your dentist loves you. You are probably the bright spot of his/her day. But it makes you wonder, how do you behave when you go to the dentist? And most importantly, are you making it easy for your dentist to give you the kind of care you want and deserve?
(Love to hate you guys
…Honestly, I love you)
Thanks for having fun with this!
May I have the liberty of adding a few less PC ideas?
1. Would you visit your Proctologist without wiping first?
2. I also like to scrape off the bulk of plaque, put it on a cracker, and then tell the patient to eat the cracker with the plaque spread. When they refuse, they still can’t understand how it’s no different than every meal they eat. REAL thinkers these guys.
3. Why will one ALWAYS clean his exit after use, but rarely his entrance?
4. I have lost all sympathy for pain due to caries and neglect. I truly feel for the trauma case, but brushes, paste, and floss are very, VERY inexpensive.
‘Why will one ALWAYS clean his exit after use, but rarely his entrance?’
LOOOOL!!!
Eww! Thanks for adding. Hope it was fun for you too
Interesting post. How serious were you on this Lolabees?
Maybe you’re just trying write a provocative blog post to get a strong reaction from people. Bulls-eye on that level and congrats on the attention you gathered.
If you were actually serious about your description of dentistry, I would say you totally self-sabotaged your own career.
Like writing a decent blog post, winning at dentistry is very much about communicating effectively. And most dentists suck at it.
I’m guessing that isn’t the case for you. Writing a blog indicates you have some love of words and enjoy connecting with people.
So if you were actually serious in your post, my guess is you bombed out at the business aspect.
You wouldn’t be alone on that. Dentists often stumble along in their businesses with a transactional mindset when it comes to service… Dentistry for dollars.
It’s no wonder that in people’s minds, dentistry is often perceived as a commodity. And here’s the thing: Patients aren’t happy exchanging what they perceive to be a honking big pile of money for an itty bitty pile of dental service.
That’s the basic value equation people have in their heads. On the surface dentistry can feel like a bad deal.
In terms of turning that perspective around, let’s just say that a dentist can’t keep blindly marching to the Dental School drumbeat like they could in the old days. Customers are the kings now, not the doctors. And nowadays, it’s all too easy to go belly up as a dentist. That was unheard of a few years ago.
Those who can master the value equation thrive, and those who can’t starve.
Hi Joe
Thanks for weighing in. Thanks for asking and trying to clarify intent on my post before making any judgments. I like that!!! Plus, it shows you are probably a good communicator yourself.
I wasn’t trying to do anything with this post, but just have a little fun. In fact, I didn’t think anyone but my mother would read it. If you read my follow-up post, you will get a little more background on my take of the situation. I was playing, making some jokes, and responding to a post titled “10 Reasons I Hate the Dentist.”
As I read your comment, it’s making me laugh– we are some bad communicators
So here goes… I like to think I’m a pretty decent communicator (at times.) I had REALLY good relationships with my patients. The reality is that I didn’t bomb out on any part of it (don’t mean to sound arrogant 
I had a really good future ahead of me and an opportunity to buy out a really wonderful dentist. It was a HUGE shock to a lot of people that I was making this decision. Bottom line is I wasn’t happy, so I had to choose that over “success,” money, prestige, or whatever people think comes along with this job. At the very least I’m hoping to change the perception that a dentist who chooses to leave the career isn’t a failure.
Thanks for your comment! It’s much appreciated– you sound like a good problem solver, something patients need
Thanks for that clarification. I can understand not loving the profession. But hating patients? I couldn’t imagine you would be the type to bite the hand that feeds you.
I can appreciate your decision about leaving dentistry. I’ve known others who made the change and were better for it.
Meanwhile I’ll keep fighting the good fight…
Just to let you know, I’ve written a bunch of stuff on the ‘Hate Dentists’ topic. In fact, an entire blog over at http://www.hatedentists.com
I use “I hate dentists” as a core marketing strategy. People can relate to it and the conversation becomes about them, not me.
Besides, I sure hated dentists when I was young!
Wow! Well done! Your site is great! I’m really impressed. It’s brilliant and has a great message. Keep fighting the good fight– we need dentists like you!
Replace the dentist with a Car mechanic and plaque with the gunk in the carburetor etc. This blog could be for all of us including the dentists hating the Car mechanics. :p
Haha! We could probably say this for a lot of different professions and services!
with the exception we would KNOW we would not have to have our molars chenged…..and that incisor is making a sound…..it wont last.
I am actually an aspiring dentist and my brother, who graduated dental school in 2008, is always telling me to just save myself the stress and debt and do hygiene or (and I have actually heard this suggestion from about 4 different dentists now) pharm. school.
I never got what he was talking about in terms of stress (I totally understand the debt- dental school is obscenely priced, and a lot of informational packets different schools send out don’t even include the out of pocket expenses students have to spend on equipment, supplies and materials), but reading through this article and every single comment has given me a totally different perspective on the dark side of dentistry in terms of stress.
I never realized how much consternation there is as a result of PATIENT negligence and attitude- I had always assumed that a big source of the stress and anxiety that came with being a dentist was the debt, overhead, scheduling and the difficulty of finding a full-time position so many are facing now.
So I’d just like to thank the dentists who commented for giving me more insight into the emotional toll the dental profession can take and the patients for providing both evidence that some patients are good and some patients are ignorant yet eager to make suggestions as if they themselves are a trained professional. You’ve actually given me a lot of things to consider regarding my future (although I’ve been vying for either cardiovascular surgery or maxillofacial surgery since I was like eight years old, so I’m sure I’ll continue on my path to dental or med school regardless), and hearing first hand accounts of what it is like to be a dentist from people other than my brother really helps me be aware of what I need to prepare myself for if I manage to be successful in my career path.
Great perspective– these are the things I didn’t know about either. It’s good for you to know some of the challenges now so you can decide if it’s for you. I would say if dentistry is your passion, then these complaints are not a big deal. If it’s not, then they can be that much bigger. It sounds like it still is what you want to do. Thanks for sharing your thoughts and good luck!
I went to the dentist last week and wrote down your blog for her so she could see this post. I wanted to get a check up before I go travelling for 12 months, next month and I have to have a filling and when I get back, my wisdom teeth extracted, but I am so glad I went. Could have been nasty needing a filling in south america! I don’t know how much dental work costs in the US, but here if you go to an NHS dentist it is only £17 for a check up and £47 for a filling and that includes the wisdom teeth extraction if you get it done in 3 months and the original check up fee. Not too bad is it? Hope you’re well.
Good girl! Yes, best to not have to worry about dental work while on the road and in a different country. Those prices sound pretty good– it can vary a lot here in the US. Happy Holidays to you, cazbag!
so tell me, when I go for my six month cleaning and check up, how come my dentist has new dental assistants all the time. Never the same ones within a six month window. Is he getting rid of them before he needs to pay them a decent wage or what.. Having a relationship with your dental assistant is as important as your dentist. I feel like he discards them, just like the floss they use on our teeth. So give me the goods, why does my Dentist not keep his hygenists for more than six months. ( ps. I heard via gossip that he only keeps them until it costs him more? I do not understand this…)
That’s an interesting perspective, and I agree that the relationship with the whole dental team is important. I guess it’s possible that what you suspect is going on, but I think that is more the exception than the rule. Most dentists want to keep their staff as long as they can. It actually becomes much more of a nuisance and more expensive to hire and train new people all the time. The hygienists and assistants may be choosing to leave on their own. Makes you wonder though…
The dentist is probably a bear to work with, so they quit. To me. that’s a sign of a bad dentist.
Very funny blog lolabees, they are the same reasons that sent me into administration
I remember a common comment from women was…
“I hate going to the dentist, I would rather have a baby” So many times I felt like responding, “Well make up your mind so I can position the chair correctly!”
cheers to my colleagues from around the world.
Thanks, Aussie! Love your response, would have been great to say that a few times. Hope to make it to your part of the world some day!
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i loved it > u said the whole truth . our profession is ahard one but i enjoy it and whatever my patients do and annoying me with their questions and comments>>>>>>i will always love them:)
in sha2 allah
Thanks! We still love them because most are really lovely people, aren’t they?
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today I had a patient come in for fillings. She is one of those people who states that they hate the dentist. When she was leaving and paying her co-pay she said, “I am paying you people for torturing me!” I told her, “No, You’re paying for us to fix your cavities, the torture is free.”
Love it! I don’t think I ever had anyone tell me they paid me to torture them– you must be mean!
Just kidding, but really, that is so over the top! Love your response! Thanks for stopping by.
This is hilarious. Of course I haven’t had to live through it…Sometimes I can’t believe the things people say. #8 is so out of line!
Thanks, Clip Snark! Yes, #8 happens all the time. Wait, they all happen all the time! Thanks for stopping by!
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This is one of the most accurate and awesome things I’ve read – as a DA who has had a day full of patients telling me they hate us!!
Thanks! Glad you liked it!
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I’m really glad I don’t do any of these things!
So is your dentist!
Thanks for stopping by!
Not that I’m a rabid, anti-dentite, but ever since Rick Moranis version of Little Shop of Horrors I’ve never been able to look at dentists the same way. Is there just a little bit of sadism there? I can’t say.
Just a little bit, Ammon.
Steve Martin also played a dentist in another movie called Novocaine. That was a good one that will give you a whole other view!
I absolutely love rants! I love listening to what peeves everybody else. I did a post “Time to Rant” a couple weeks ago and felt so much better afterwards.
I will be honest, I’m not the biggest fan of dentists and I’m sure you probably get that a lot. And now after this post, I understand dentists aren’t the biggest fan of their patients
Very well done, and very funny!
Thanks, Joe! It’s funny how a good rant will get people from all over involved. I’ll have to check out your rant. Glad you liked it despite your feelings about being a dental patient
Wow! Never realized how rude people could be to the dentist. I go regularly and as a result only have 1 cavity at 49 years of age. I am grateful for the hygienists and all that they do. Ironically, I now work for a dental products supply company.
Thanks, K! We are grateful for patients like you! Hope you enjoy your work in the field
you seem like a pretty cool dentist, too bad a lot of them are douchebags. sometimes, you cant exactly pick your dentist and are stuck with what you got.
Haha! Thanks, Jessica!
You are completely right, except that you can pick your dentist. You should find one you like — there really are some good ones out there, and it makes all the difference in the world.
The Dentist I’m now seeing has dental assistants complete most minor procedures for him . From what I understand In Ca its legal . He will whip in drill your tooth and leaves his flunkey assistant to fill it .
In my experience he prepped my crown left her to cement it in place . The next day I’m looking at my shiny new crown and hey its looks like there’s a small hole in it . Back to his office I go.. the Flunky assistant tells me O yeah I should have told you about that . “The lab made the crown real thin around that area could not be helped” . I guess she took her dental bur and oops slipped while fitting my nice new crown .
She hurried me out of there by telling me its not that big a deal and there’s really nothing that can be done .
Cant wait to show this piece of work to his hygienist who I actually like and respect. I’m sure he will be there will have to wait and see what he has to says about this ….
And by the way I enjoyed reading your article…. yes your right its a two way street in dealing with your dentist …..
Thanks for commenting, Bernard. In Colorado assistants are allowed to do a lot of procedures also. Sometimes it can work out very well, and other times it’s not so good. The bottom line is the dentist is responsible for any work that is done in his/her office. I used to work in an office in which we had a lot of those problems with our crowns. I ultimately switched jobs and never had this problem ever again! In our case, the hole was in the porcelain, and the crown was still intact functionally because there was gold under the porcelain. I always informed my patients of this, giving them the option of having a crown that did not have metal showing through. To me, the big problem here is that they did not inform you. It’s just poor customer service. I’ll also add that this is the responsibility of the dentist to train his assistants properly regarding such a situation. If there is indeed a hole in the entire crown, than it is absolutely not okay, and they should replace it for you. Either way, if you are unhappy with the crown, I would talk to the dentist about it. He may have a good solution for you. If it were me and many other dentists that I know, we would replace it for you. I hope you can get this resolved. Good luck!
Assistants are the salt of the earth. They are not “flunkies”, they are well trained. Talk to the dentist if you want your issues resolved… unless you just want to gossip.
Update! went to the dentist yesterday to have a tooth out. The dentist who did it and I had something in common, we’d both read this post!
Haha! Thanks, Dave! See, I’m bringing dentists and patients together
I am having 33000.00 dolars worth of work for implant supported dentures. My dentist rants on with the assistant having conversations and flirting with her(they are both married.) I finally told him that I do not want to hear anymore of his boring hockey stories or family stories. I think he should just focus on what he is doing talk to me when necessary and otherwise keep his mouth shut the fuck up. He is clueless as to the amount of discomfort he is inflicting and actuall; had the nerve to tell me that I have to work with him when I complained about some pain. (I only do when it is more then I can handle) This guy just gets worse each time I see him and I am too far along to fire his egotistical ass. He has no bed side manners. Geez do they teach you dentist anything about empathy for your patient??? He must have skipped those classes or paid off his teacher to get his passing grade during that part. THIS GUY PUT ON SUCH A GREAT SHOW TO SELL ME AND NOW I am shopping for a good malpractice attorney in case he screws this up. I pray he does not but I will make it a pount to put him out of business permanetly if he does. Boy I feel better already. As for the dentist that started this ranting about his patience. I understand why you hated them but Good God man Why the fuck did you go into dentistry if you hated it so much??? Damn dude!???
John (I’m guessing that’s your name,)
I am being totally honest and not sarcastic with this response as I was in the original post I wrote. Help me to understand something… I know you said it too late to “fire his egotistical ass,” but how far into it are you? I once had a woman ask me to give her crown to her so she could take it to someone else to cement it. I asked her what I had done to upset her, and she refused to tell me. I thought we had great rapport and that the appointment went really well. What was I missing? So my point is, in most cases, it’s never too late. I don’t understand why you would continue to see a dentist that you hate so much that you are almost hoping will cause damage to YOUR mouth just so you can get revenge and sue him. I know you say you hope for the best results, but already shopping for a malpractice attorney is an action that doesn’t support that statement.
I know with the tone of your comment that you probably expect me to respond back to you with a similar tone, but you didn’t make me angry enough to do that
Did you really tell him to “keep his mouth shut the fuck up?” If so, maybe if you politely explained that their discussion makes you nervous or uncomfortable (or whatever it is,) and could they refrain from the chitchat, maybe he would respect your wishes. It’s possible they are just keeping the appointment light in an attempt to make you comfortable.
I don’t know you, and I don’t know this guy. You could be a very easy, friendly guy or you could be a very difficult patient. He might be a great dentist or a complete douche, but I don’t understand why you are trusting someone you hate to do some of the most important work on your body that you might ever have. If you feel stuck with him, why don’t you have an polite discussion with him about how you feel? I do know that implant-supported dentures are great, and hopefully you will love the results.
As for your last comment, if you read my other posts, you will see a very candid answer to “why the fuck did [I] go into dentistry”. And, I’m not a dude, I’m a dudette.
My only complaint with your article is #5. I’m sorry if I make a wincing face when you are drilling and there’s suddenly an odd noise. I’m also sorry if my tongue gets in the way at times. I’m generally a little tense playing the “waiting for pain” game (especially since I tend to have a high tolerance to pain medication so I always seem to feel pain regardless of how much medication is used) so I’m not 100% conscious of where all my body parts are or if they are in the way and/or making you uncomfortable.
And to be fair, if my tongue is in the way or my wincing is causing you stress… guess which one of us can more easily ask the other to change their behavior. Is it A: The person lying down in a chair with tools in their mouth, or B: the person sitting in a chair using said tools.
I know my comment is bitchy, but I genuinely liked reading this post. Although I don’t care for the dentistry process, I know it is a necessary thing I must endure and always try my hardest to be as pleasant as possible even if I’m in pain.
Glad you liked most of the post
It’s okay, some people thought my entire post was bitchy, even though I was just playing. There’s a joke between dentists that you should never ask a patient to do anything with their tongue because they will always do the opposite. It’s not because they do it on purpose, but it’s because they truly have no control over their tongue! And, it’s true. Sometimes my entire body used to hurt because I was using all of my strength to hold a tongue out of the way just so that I could get to the tooth. It’s pretty rare, but happens. Thanks for you comment, Michael!
The truth is the dentist (and his staff) don’t even like some of
their patients. This is what got dentists all over that
post. It’s true! Unprofessional, but hey, that’s human
nature. The real truth is that the dentist should not
treat people he doesn’t like. Jerome Groopman, author of How Doctors Think, tells us that mistakes in diagnosis are more likely to occur when doctors treat
people they don’t like.
Isn’t that true? I think the general public forgets that as much as they have the right to choose their doctors, we have the right to choose our patients. Although, as I’m typing this, I’m realizing that many patients don’t even know that they really have a choice. We always hear how they feel trapped. It really does lead to a negative situation all around. Thanks for the comment!
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The only point I question is the wincing when you don’t feel pain thing. I am a very sensitive person physically. This is a thing that applies in many aspects of my existence. I was born premature and I think that has something to do with it, and it comes up in odd ways like when I get a haircut. (I don’t have as much scalp as most people and it’s honestly very painful to get my hair cut with say, a straight razor) Things in my mouth are also very sensitive and often painful when they wouldn’t be for other people, I’m sure. I can bear a lot of pain but generally I can’t do so silently; being able to make a little noise and grimace is just how I deal with it. I want to be a good patient and I do my best but I’ve had a dentist just outright dismiss all of my upset and that made it very hard to trust him enough to get the work done that I needed. The dentist I go to now is the best dentist I’ve ever encountered and the guy could basically get me to put up with anything, because he never dismisses my concerns or tells me I am not feeling pain when I am. Not everyone responds to toughen up style bedside manner. God knows I don’t. But with a little soothing and reassurance I will very quickly come around.
Yours sounds like the perfect patient-dentist success story. I was never much of the “toughen up” type as a dentist. I don’t think it’s the way to get it done either. It’s great that you’ve found a dentist you trust and like, and I’m sure he doesn’t hate you at all because you want to be a good patient. Really– if you love your dentist, they’ll love you right back. Thanks for joining in the discussion!
Some things I agree with, but as a person who has been in complete agony following a root canal in my front lower tooth for 4 days now, I am not very sympathetic towards dentists at the moment. I generally like my dentist – he’s fair with pricing and is skilled and takes care of things that other dentist usually refer to a surgeon. My problem is that he is absolutely unsympathetic to pain.
2 years ago when he extracted one of my wisdom teeth, he told me I should only be a little uncomfortable and to take an OTC pain med if needed. Well, I could not sleep that night from the pain and resorted to using up my last pain med I had hidden away after toe surgery.
This time, as he’s doing my root canal (granted, this tooth had been infected in the root for a while and I waited an extra day following pain before seeing him), he keeps telling me I will feel much better with all the pressure he’s relieving. And again, to take an Ibuprofen if I need it. WRONG! as soon as the shot wore off, I was in agony. I’d take 4 ibuprofen and it would barely take the edge off and only last for an hour.
I called him and he asked if I was taking my antibiotics – yes, of course. He said the pain would get better by the evening and to call him if it didn’t. Well, it didn’t. I was up several times during the night in tears from the pain and popping Tylenol and Ibuprofen like it was candy. After calling, they said “well, that’s the only thing we can give”. Really?!? Everybody else I know gets Vicodin. I can’t believe they’d make me beg for pain meds and not give them to me.
I decided to show up the next day (2 days after the procedure) and he reluctantly took an X-ray and saw that nothing had gone wrong and just told me to suck it up for another 3 days and let the antibiotics work and call him. This is 2012, not 1850. What good comes out of me being in horrific pain? Why can’t he just get his pad out and put me out of my misery??
After this procedure is finalized (I still need to go back for another root cleaning), I’m changing dentists. You’re dealing with people’s bodies not a car.
He will probably be glad to see you go. As I read your post all kinds of “red flags” went up in my mind of someone who seeks prescription drugs as a way to get high in a “legal” way. This dentist probably has gotten the same thing and quite honestly, you probably have done this to yourself if you have gone to him for any length of time. And I can bet that the anger you feel right now at me is that I don’t have any care or feelings, which is 100% incorrect. I have a cousin who is just like you and she is an addict like you are. I bet you need Vicodin for pain if you happen to stub your big toe too.I have sympathy for those that truly have pain. I also have posted several times and anyone who has read them can see that I am a caring person. Sorry, but you scream addict to me.
You say you are a caring person but your comment is judgmental nonsense. I have never in my life been addicted to pain pills but when I have a medical procedure done I need a lot of them. I’m sensitive to pain. But as soon as the recovery is over, I set the Vicodin down and don’t pick it up again until the next serious thing. You don’t know what this guy’s root canal was like or how sensitive he is to pain yet you’re calling him an addict? That’s a brass pair right there and your awful attitude is exactly why I switched dentists; you two would have gotten along famously.
Thankfully I am not a dentist. I am however a dental assistant and have seen many cases of pain. One of the patients that the dentist I worked for had a patient that used the phrase “I have a right to pain meds” only to have the pharmacy call to let us know that she was on an abuse watch. Turns out that yes, she is an addict and the only thing she could then receive for pain meds were Ibuprofen. Jaeme, if that is judgmental and uncaring, then I guess I am. I however see it as telling someone that they need help and not in the pain med kind of way. I for one care enough about a person to tell them honestly that I believe they have a problem, wish more people had that amount of caring in this society. As lolabee’s nicely stated, “a dentist has to be careful about prescribing pain pills” because if they are found to be aiding this person’s addiction, they can have serious ramifications in which not only will this one patient not be able to be free of pain, but the rest of their patients will not have pain control either. They can be ordered to go through additional drug awareness classes, have to pay a higher DEA license fee, higher malpractice fees, and the list goes on and on.
Of course you have to be careful. Addiction is a real thing, and I recognize that. But I still don’t see how you looked at the OP’s story and got drug addict. He’s in horrible pain for days and days and this guy won’t give him a single bottle of vicodin? That’s crazy. You have to be careful yeah but he sounds like a regular at the dentist’s office and suffered for a long time before even asking. It’s not cool to automatically assume everyone who wants pain meds and wants them badly does it because they’re addicts, especially over the Internet.
Arie, of course this isn’t funny to you– you are in pain!
But seriously everything is worse when you are in pain.
I’ll first start by saying… it sounds like a good thing that you will find a new dentist. Once any trust is lost on both sides, it’s best to move on. Plus, if you don’t feel he is addressing your pain, then something is definitely missing from the picture here. While many of us dental geeks are sympathetic most of the time, some personalities just don’t have that. Maybe your dentist is one of them. I don’t know, but I do know that as a patient I don’t want any doctor or dentist who doesn’t seem to care.
While I can say your 4 days of pain is not the expected outcome, it is also not uncommon. What I mean is, according to the science of what we do, all the stuff he is telling you is supposed to be true. You shouldn’t be in any pain, but since we are dealing with individuals, we can never predict who will have the textbook results, and who will not (one of the reasons I didn’t like dentistry– it tortured me to know people were suffering when I did everything by the book.) These moments are when it’s best to deal with the individual as an individual and not as an expected outcome. There are a lot of dentists out there that do that. It sounds like you didn’t get that unfortunately. Personally, I don’t see why he wouldn’t give you a few pain pills, but I also understand that the challenge for dentists is that they do have to be careful about prescribing pain meds, so I can’t really judge the situation.
You may not want my advice, but if you are still in pain when he tries to finish the root canal, I would consider seeing a specialist instead of having him finish it. In my final years practicing I worked with an AMAZING endodontist who wouldn’t finish a root canal if there were still symptoms. Just my 2 cents. Good luck, and hope your suffering ends.
Great list ! patients are what make this career unbearable… They are big ungrateful whales sitting beached in our chairs demanding our time and best attention but then begrudging payment after we broke our backs, eyes and fingers working in their dark, smelly, wet mouths. Sigh…
Thanks! Haha! Don’t sugar coat it
I love your imagery here. You just about sum it all up.
This was such an awesome article…. and you totally schooled that Redhead Chronicles chick!
Haha! Thanks! I did, didn’t I? Bring it!
I have been a dentist for 5 years and have started to resent my profession. I love what I do and always give my best, but it is not the teeth that bother me. It is what they are attached to- a person.
As a dentist, we are expected to be professional and from start to finish manage the patient well and deliver quality results, but it’s a two way street. I wake up in the morning, get ready, have breakfast, and head out the door to have a good day. Not to go to work and deal with nastiness of patients. People tend to bring their worst sides to the dental appointment. They think as they are afraid of the dentist, its okay to be difficult. What they don’t realize is that one poor soul (the dentist) is dealing with the craziness of patients every hour on the hour. Every human being has a breaking point and I am reaching mine.
The best of all or should I say the worst of all is when a patient is upset as its taking forever to do the dentistry and they go to the front desk and be loud and obnoxious and complain how they were in forever for their appointment ( by forever I mean 2 hours ). Have they ever thought as to why it could be taking this long for the procedure? Could it be that they are difficult to manage?
From being late, to complaining as how they are not looking forward to it, to spitting every two seconds into suction, to not open up wide, to not sit still, and my favorite one- text while having work done or take phone calls. Guys, the TVs are offered in the operatory to watch while waiting on the dentist, not to tilt your head away from the head rest to watch ESPN or local news or Kardashians. Why do I have to ask you to look up every few seconds?
If you can’t open wide enough how do you expect me to see what it is I am doing. You complain not to recline you back far enough as you have a bad back or neck and than you don’t open wide enough or have the usual uncontrolled tongue. To deliver quality results I have to bend over to see my work field. I am 30 years old with a bad back to numbness in arms. I am wondering how long I can last.
Do you ever realize that you are in the chair for a couple hours while I need to keep my posture to avoid repetitive injury to my body? It is always the dentist who has to make things work around unsuitable working conditions while expected to deliver the best results.
Now to the famous say as to how dentists are greedy. It costs a luxury house loan to go through 8 years or grueling studies. Plus government wants to increase the interest rate and make profit of it and tax you insanely. Yes, I am going to charge you $1400 for a crown because once I am done chopping the price down to $700 due to your insurance, pay my front desk, pay my dental assistant, use quality supplies for your tooth, high technology, rent, and lab bills. I may have made $200 of it. That $200 does not make a huge dent in my student loans. You want 100% of my attention; well simply pay 100% of the fees. You want discounted service, than settle for discounted experience- but good work.
Yes, the schedule is over booked and I can’t sit and give you all my attention. And yes, I need to see multiple patients in an hour because your insurance has just made the numbers so low that to keep the doors open I need to work like a machine.
In short, For all the hard work I have put in to becoming a dentist and to deal with difficult patients, day in day out, I deserve what I make. Don’t call dentist greedy till you have lived in their shoes. Believe me you don’t want to- it’s a stressful life. For all this stress, dentist need to be compensated well.
I could go on and on about the life of a dentist. I still enjoy what I do, just not the psyche I need to deal with.
From,
D.D.S.
Hi DDS. Yep. As I am a little more removed from dentistry I am even more aware that the patient management is by far the hardest part. I will admit, it’s nice not to have to deal with it anymore. I still work with people, and it is so much more pleasant now. I hope you sort this out and find a way to find joy in this field or at least elsewhere. Much luck to you. It’s not easy.